


Night Sky

by dreamchangelive



Series: Night Sky [1]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Alternative Perspective, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Spoilers, Canon Divergence - Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Captain America: Civil War (Movie) Spoilers, Drama & Romance, Falling In Love, First Kiss, First Time, Friendship, Friendship/Love, Getting Together, Grief/Mourning, Lost Love, Love, Love Confessions, M/M, Slow Build, Steve Feels, Team as Family, Tony Feels, True Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-29
Updated: 2019-12-26
Packaged: 2020-11-07 14:34:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 45,403
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20818898
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dreamchangelive/pseuds/dreamchangelive
Summary: What would have happened if Pepper had also disappeared with Thanos' snap?A story of acceptance, grief, overcoming adversities, but above all a journey to true love. A path that was necessary to walk so finally those two souls could be together forever.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoy the story! :) English is not my native language, so I am sorry for the spelling and/or grammatical errors. Thanks for reading! Kisses! :) :*

Tony was standing at the end of the wooden path over the lake admiring the night sky, and feeling the peacefulness that surrounded that place. How would he love to be there with her, he thought. Eleven months had passed since the last time he had her in his arms, but the memories had not lost its strength yet. He could still feel the warmth of her body as he hugged her, the sweetness of her tender lips. When he thought of her, he could still see that sweet smile that kept his heart alive for so many years. _ Pepper, Love._ Tony closed his eyes and let the warm breeze of the summer day embrace him. His mind started wandering inside the memories shared with her. She was his world, his purpose, the reason for living. _I miss you. It cannot be possible to live without you, can I? _Then, without warning, that thought assaulted him with the same force of the emotions rooted in it. That moment came back to haunt his peace. _ Why did he let that to happen? _No, he wanted to think of her, how he missed her and loved her. _ Loves _her. But now his mind could not stop recreating that scene, those feelings. He left, ran away and likewise all that turmoil came with him. Suddenly, Tony's quiet heart started to beat faster when he heard a car entering the cabin. It could only be him, he thought. He heard the car stopped and someone stepping out. He did not want to look back. Tony was sure it would be him. 

The steps were carefully approaching.

«Tony,» he heard him say and his heart beat even faster, but Tony was certain he should not do this.

«Please, let me explain,» Steve said, pleading.

«There's no need for explanations, Cap,» Tony said looking straight to the lake. His words came out with a hint of sharpness.

«I think we should talk,» Steve insisted.

«We kissed, Steve. That is all,» Tony replied without looking back.

«It is not all for me,» Steve said firmly.

Finally, Tony turned around and looked at him. Steve body was tense, nevertheless, it was clear it was trying to hide all the pain his eyes were showing. «It is for me. You are wasting your time here.»

«Tony, what we...» Steve tried to explain.

«My name must be some kind of lucky charm for you or something? You use it a lot. Too much I could say,» Tony interrupted him trying to change the object of the conversation. He really did not want to talk about it. He did not want to talk to Steve. So he decided, at that precise moment, it was time to go to sleep. Tony started walking to the house.

«I love you,» Steve said staring at him.

Tony stopped dead and stared back. _What did he say? Love? Who talked about love?_ _No one was allowed to talk about love!_, his mind yelled. Love had died the day he returned and learned she also had disappeared. No one could talk about love. It was not _allowed_.

«I have loved you for so many years now, and I knew I should keep this for myself because you were with Pepper...» Steve said with a tremor in his voice that Tony had never heard before.

«Don't say her name!» Tony shouted out with anguish in his voice.

«I'm sorry. I just wanted to explain. Please, Tony, don´t do this...» Steve said, now begging.

«I don't want to hear anything. No explanations, no _ confessions_, nothing. It was a stupid moment, a ridiculous kiss that did not mean anything to me. And I really don't care if it meant something to you.» Tony took a deep breath and look at Steve with resignation. «Maybe it is time for you truly learn the lesson, Cap. We lost, EVERYTHING. We lost, and there is no way back.» 

Tony passed by Steve side and walked very fast to the house. His thoughts were numbed, and he truly couldn't understand himself. _ Why had he screamed? _He knew he was running away from something and despite everything, only a tremendous anger overwhelmed him at that moment. Once inside the house, he leaned against the front door. His heart was still agitated, unbridled, and he was breathing as desperately as if that were the end of some battle. Tony closed his eyes trying to calm himself. _ Who was he fighting? _He thought. _ It was that a battle against Steve or against himself? _The only response he could give himself was he shouldn't have hurt him that way.

After a few minutes, he slid down until he fell on the floor with his head still leaning on the door. He hadn't heard the car start up again, so Steve was still there at the lake. A part of him could recognize that feeling, he thought. But another part of him, which seemed to be the dominant one, spoke him of guilt and remorse. _ Pepper, Love, why this seems like a halo of hope that allows my heart to continue beating? Even when I don't want to accept it. _Tony didn't know what to do or think. He just hoped to hear the car start and Steve getting away from him. 

Tony heard steps approaching, and they seemed hesitant. _ Don't come here _ , _ don't come here, _ Tony repeated over and over in his mind. He would certainly not know what to do now if Steve knocked on the door. "_I love you _ ," he could hear Steve's voice compete against his own thoughts. Tony put his ear to the door. His whole body was curled up against it as if only that simple piece of wood was the abyss that separated them. He placed his hand against the door; _ I'm sorry Steve. I cannot do this_, he said in a silent sigh. Suddenly, the steps that seemed doubtful going back and forth stopped, and Tony's heart too. _ Please go away ,_ he repeated in his mind. Steve approached the door, and the world as it had once been conceived, changed in an instant.

_ _ _ _ _ 

_ “Bruce gave him a sedative. He's gonna probably be out for the rest of the day.” _

Tony was starting to wake up. He could feel the heaviness in his body, and his eyes didn't want to open even though he wanted to know where he was. His senses began to respond very slowly, and he heard someone's footsteps. He felt so tired and although he insisted his eyes open, they seemed to have their own will and ignored him. Someone was by his side; he could feel a presence. Whoever was there took him by the hand and stroked it gently. _ Who was touching him? _ Tony wondered. Likewise, he felt a caress on his face. Someone was caressing him softly, and he heard the sound of words that seemed whispers, but that he could not understand. _ I must open my eyes_, he said to himself. Now other steps were heard, and Tony felt a strange emptiness when those caresses and the closeness of whoever was there was gone. He tried opening his eyes again, and now they responded. Everything was so blurred, and he could not distinguish his surrounding. He could only see a blurred figure coming out the door of a room he did not recognize either.

"Hey buddy, how are you feeling?" Tony thought that voice was very familiar, and when he could focus his vision, he saw Bruce in front of him.

"Bruce..." he heard himself say. He wanted to stay focus and talk, but he couldn't. He wanted to ask Bruce who had been there, who had spoken to him, but the weariness raged again and an intoxicating dream could do more than he.

"It's OK, Tony. You need to rest" Tony heard Bruce say in the distance, and he also agreed, it was better to keep sleeping.

_ _ _ _ _

"How you feel?" Rhodey asked.

"With a hangover; not even in my best moments did I take something as strong as what you gave me," Tony said smiling.

"We both know that is a lie, but it is also true that you needed to rest," Rhodey replied smiling as well.

"At least you look better too," Bruce said as he approached Rhodey who was sitting on Tony's bed.

"I need some air, can I go outside for a moment, doctor?" Tony asked Bruce, who smiled at the question.

"Yes, but without walking Tony. I know it must be annoying to go in the wheelchair, but it would be better if you don't make much effort," Bruce replied trying to use his best doctor voice.

"Come on, I help you," Rhodey said, and between Bruce and him helped Tony sit in the wheelchair.

_ _ _ _ _

Rhodey took Tony to the compound's garden, and he sat on a bench next to him. It was sunset, and the bright hues of colors in the sky lost all the brightness when Tony's features darkened at moment they got there.

"She told me not to get on the ship," Tony said.

"You were doing what any of us would have done" Rhodey replied.

"It happened, what I was so afraid of, it happened. The world disappeared before my eyes and I couldn't do anything. I couldn't protect her," Tony said with remorse.

"Tony, it's not your fault. I know it's hard to see it now. But I will be by your side every day of the rest of my life to make you see that it's not your fault.” Rhodey told him with a lot of conviction in his voice.

“I fought thinking about her. I fought trying to save a world that didn't know what was happening and yet it wasn't enough. Pepper, Happy, Peter..." Tony's hurt voice resonated in the silence darkening sky while naming the people he loved, his family.

“We can't blame ourselves because a madman decided he had the ultimate truth about the lives of millions of living beings. And above all you, whom I have seen grow and become the best version of yourself, you cannot blame yourself for something that was beyond our reach. The world became something bigger than us, and now we know it,” Rhodey told him. In his words there was a welcoming serenity that calm Tony's aching heart at least a little.

They spent a few minutes there while Tony's gaze was lost on the horizon. A comfortable silence embraced them and Rhodey´s hand was caressing him on the shoulder. Tony knew Rhodey was right, but that wasn't enough to feel better. He lost everything when losing Pepper. The love of his live, his best friend, his partner, his world…

“What else is out there for me now?” Tony asked with a sigh.

“The world still exists out there, and we swore an unspoken oath that said we were going to protect it. We could still help others. Heal are our wounds while healing theirs too,” Rhodey said with optimism.

“I'm glad you are here,” Tony said looking to Rhodey eyes and trying to convey his love for him. He still had his other best friend, he thought. 

“I am too, man, I am grateful you are here too,” Rhodey replied with a soft smile.

_ _ _ _ _ _


	2. Chapter 2

_ 3 weeks later _

Tony was going to the kitchen of the compound with a tablet in his hands trying to check out what was happening in the world. It was pretty early in the morning, but without his coffee he could not call himself a person. As he walked into the kitchen, he saw Steve who was standing with his back to him and was pouring a cup of coffee. Tony hadn't seen him since _ that day _he passed out. It was pretty obvious Steve was avoiding him. But the truth was, he really did not want to see him either. It had not even occurred to him to ask about the Cap. Although he knew he also was living there like everyone else. So this was going to be awkward, but the time had come, he thought. 

Tony cleared his throat, “Good morning,” he said, and thought Steve must be very absorbed in his thoughts to not listen someone was approaching. His reaction seemed quite natural, even when it was to tense his body like getting ready for an attack. 

“Good morning, Tony,” Steve said turning around and looking into his eyes, but it was just a second because he immediately looked down at the cup of coffee in his hands. “How do you feel?”

"Better, thanks." Tony couldn't understand what was happening. _ Was Rogers ashamed? _Why didn't he look him in the eyes?

"I am happy for you,” Steve said leaving the cup of coffee on the table. “I have to go," he also said very quickly and passed by his side still without looking at him.

"OK," Tony said following his steps until he saw him leave.

At that moment Natasha entered the kitchen, "Good morning Stark, I'm starving. Have you had breakfast yet?"

"What was that?" Tony asked pointing where Steve went off.

"It's quite obvious both of you have been avoiding each other," Natasha said smiling.

"Yes, but at least we can be polite to each other, right?" Tony said with resentment.

"Depends on what it means to you to be polite. Do you need a kiss on the cheek with the _ good morning ?"_ Natasha said teasing.

"Shut up, Romanoff," Tony said, rolling his eyes, "I need my cup of coffee, that's what I need."

_ _ _ _ _

Tony was heading to the compound entrance thinking that everyone was helping in whatever they could. Rhodey and he had meetings with different members of the government, to try to establish some kind of social order within the chaos in which was everything. It was something to focus on. It made him feel good to help putting on track the lives of the people still on the planet. It was quite difficult to understand it was a worldwide chaos, less to understand the universal scale that Thanos had given to all that. Tony left the compound and headed to the car where Rhodey was waiting for him.

"I should drive," Tony said sitting in the passenger seat.

"Yes, but Bruce doesn't recommend it yet," Rhodey said smiling.

"Whatever," said Tony.

"OK, it's not about the car, why the bad temper?" Rhodey asked him raising an eyebrow.

"Nothing," Tony said looking out the car window.

"We are so few in this world now, and I mean it literally. Too few to keep that grudge until eternity," Rhodey said emphasizing he knew why Tony was upset.

"What are you talking about?" Tony said pretending he didn't know what or whom Rhodey was talking about.

"Yeah, of course, you don't know. I know you pall, and the only thing both of you have to do is say you are sorry and get over it. There are more important things out there to worry about," Rhodey told him.

"Sorry, you are right. Let's go," Tony said with some resignation.

_ _ _ _ _

“I am going to talk to Nat to schedule a meeting, and _ please, _ talk to Steve before the meeting?” Rhodey told Tony while driving back to the compound. The whole team needed to discuss what they talked with the secretary of state. 

“I will. I promise,” Tony said firmly.

When they arrived at the compound, Tony asked Friday if Steve was there. The AI replied he was in the gym, so Tony went there thinking what he should say first. Walking through the facility he saw Steve running on the treadmill. Tony came closer, and when Steve saw him, stopped the machine immediately.

"We were with Blaine. Rhodey is going to schedule a meeting for us to discuss," Tony told him speaking very formally.

"Good, that's good. What time would it be? We are going to connect with Wakanda too. I suppose," Steve said stepping out and looking at the floor.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have yelled at you that day. There was no way you knew I was on board of that ship. Even when you weren't close. It all happened so fast you wouldn't have been able to help either," Tony said now sounding embarrassed.

"Tony, no, it's me who is sorry for _ everything _. Please, forgive me for pressing you when you had just arrived. I know it must have been days of starving and feeling the despair of being lost miles away without hope of returning. But I felt desperate and we wanted, we tried to solve something that without knowing, had no solution" Steve said with sadness in his voice and this time, he did look into his eyes.

"We can stop avoiding each other now," Tony said with a half smile.

"I didn't want to bother you. I'm truly sorry," Steve said, still staring at him.

"It's all good now. I'll see you in the meeting room," Tony said heading to the exit.

"Tony," Steve said hesitant, and when Tony turned to see him, he could tell Steve now looked relaxed. "Thank you.”

Tony nodded, and continued on his way to the lab. Without knowing it, he also felt a huge weight had been removed from his shoulders. Rhodey was right, they had to focus on the future and leave old resentments behind.

_ _ _ _ _ 

"At least we still have pizza. This is to be grateful," Rhodey said biting a slide of pizza. He and Tony were in the lab having dinner. "If I'm honest, the meeting was better than I thought."

"Well, I was expectant, but I think we can amend things a bit," Tony said with confidence.

"Steve visited you every day you were unconscious. He stayed all night by you side sitting in a chair," Rhodey said out of nowhere.

"Why are you telling me this now?" Tony said bewildered at that statement.

"You would have bothered if I had told you before. So it seems appropriate to say it now I saw you both could be together in a room without punching each other faces," Rhodey said laughing.

Tony did not know what to say and simply took a piece of pizza and started eating. It couldn't be, he thought. He was sure that day had only been a dream. But now, with Rhodey's words, the memory seemed to be clearer. That blurry silhouette, that left the room, was _ Rogers_? No, because the caress on his face and his hand. No, that must have been a dream. Tony was completely sure.

"He's not a bad person, and you already know that. He was really worried about you," Rhodey said, drawing him out of his abstraction.

"I know," Tony said knowing he truly believed it. Of course Cap was not a bad person.

"Suddenly you became a man of few words, that's strange," Rhodey said looking at him intrigued.

"It's just I'm tired, but you were right to tell me to talk to Rogers, it's better this way," Tony assured him. "Maybe now I can go to the gym too. I have no excuse for not going" also said smiling broadly.

“Tomorrow 6 am?” Rhodey asked teasing.

“I said I should, not that I would, and I have to talk with my doctor first. Maybe he doesn't allow yet.” Tony said, and they both laughed. 

_ _ _ _ _ 

A few weeks later they were on a mission. Although Tony had believed that perhaps their days as Avengers were over, he eventually realized the world was still there needing them. Natasha, Steve and he finished helping the police, and now Tony was flying back home. _Home_. The word rumbled in his mind. He noticed he hadn't returned home, his real home, his and Pepper's, after all that time. Tony could recognize he had thought about it, but he also had felt he was not prepared to go. Suddenly, he changed his flight course.

"Friday, let's go to my house," Tony said.

"Yes, Sir, do you want me to inform Mr. Rhodes?" Friday asked.

"No, it's fine like that. It will only be a moment," Tony replied.

When Tony landed in the doorway of their house, a cold chill ran through his entire body. For a moment, he stood there only watching the whole place. It was all covered in dust, _ abandoned_. He hadn't dared to ask Rhodey about his home before, and now he wasn't sure if he had enough strength to enter. After a few seconds, he put away his suit and took a few steps toward the house.

Time had stopped on that fateful day, and everything there was a photograph that accurately portrayed emptiness and loss. Tony dared to take one more step and walked through the living room. Maybe it was better to go to the lab, he told himself, there he could take something useful. He went down to the lab and noticed how time had stopped there too. The air felt heavy, and every object in the lab seemed to claim to the living that they were left alone. Memories came to him without he giving them permission to interrupt him. The images of Pepper were erupting in his mind, and he could distinguish the places where she had been with him. He could see her as an ethereal ghost that laughed, talked, moved her body, touched him, but that also vanished in the mist. He could not take anything from there.

Even though his heart warned him that it would be very difficult to cope, Tony decided to go up to the room he shared with Pepper. When he reached the door, it was closed. His hands landed on the handle, however, he didn't know if he could open it. He had fought a titan and yet, he felt defeated by a simple handle on his hands. When Tony decided to open it, he wasn't sure if it was just his imagination, but he could feel her smell. It was so fresh, so new that it seemed as if she was still there. He entered, and his eyes searched for her desperately, even when his mind told him that he confused memory with reality. _ Pepper, love_. Tony stopped and looked at the closet with all her clothes. Everything was still there intact. Objects that also cried out because of the loneliness and abandonment. He approached and took a piece of her clothes, brought it to his face and could still feel her smell. He no longer cared if it was only his imagination, for him it was her smell, it was her, his Pepper, his life. Suddenly, his thoughts rusted with the uncertainty of how it had happened. He saw them vanish in front of his eyes, he thought. Peter had turned to dust in his hands, and she too had vanished. _ How did it happen? Where did it happen? Did she suffer much? Why hadn't he stayed with her? _ Tony's heart began to beat faster, and he could feel the lack of air. All of a sudden, he heard steps approaching the room. _ Who else could be there? _

A few second later, Steve was at the door of the room.

“Tony, are you alright?” Steve asked him with worry in his voice. For Tony own surprise, he found himself kneeling with his hands resting on the floor and Pepper's piece of clothing in front of him. He hadn't noticed when he fell to the floor.

"I'm fine," Tony said with short breath, trying to get up from the floor. "Why are you here?"

"We were supposed to go back to the compound, and I didn't see you come. I asked Friday and she told me you came here," Steve explained.

"That doesn't answer my question, Cap," Tony said, now standing and breathing a little more calmly.

"I was worried about you," Steve said looking at him with concern.

"I don't need a babysitter. I just wanted to come and get some things, that was all." Tony explained knowing that there was no point in what he said if Steve had caught him in the middle of a panic attack.

"I just want to help you," Steve replied.

"You know, you don't have to feel guilty all your life for what happened between us. It's okay you hide that your best friend killed my parents and well, he's now dead too, maybe with that we're even," Tony said with bitterness.

“Tony,” Steve took a deep breath and was looking at him with some kind of understanding. He didn't seem upset. 

Still, Tony couldn't believe that those bitter words came out of his mouth. He didn't really think that. He didn't feel better because Barnes's death. But after hearing him, seeing him there, he remembered Rhodey's words. And an overwhelming rage took possession of him, instead of any other feeling he knew he shouldn't feel.

"I know how difficult all this can be. I have lived it long enough to know it is not easy to accept it. Even less learn to live with it,” Steve paused as thinking how to continue. 

“You were also my friend, even when I defended him. At that moment, I thought he and I were alone in a world we didn't understand. I needed to help him and so maybe help myself along the way.” Steve took another deep breath and looked at him with an intensity that made Tony felt a shiver down his neck.

“I didn't want to lose you. I'm so sorry for hurting you. It wasn't my intention and could never be. You gave me a home, your friendship, and I will be eternally grateful. I'm just here worried about my friend,” Steve said with a sigh.

Tony looked at the floor, now he felt ashamed. “I didn't mean to say that. It was rude. I'm sorry too,” said looking at Steve. “Sometimes I can be a truly jerk,” Tony finished saying miserably.

“It's alright, I understand you. Take all the time you need. I can give you a ride if you need,” Steve replied.

“Tony? Are you here Tony?” They could hear the voice of Rhodey in the distance.

"That's the true babysitter," Tony said with a smile.

Steve smiled back, "Do you want me to say something to him?"

Tony didn't have time to respond, and Rhodey was already at the door of the room.

"Hey man, you should have told me you wanted to come. I would have come with you too," Rhodey told Tony, nodding at Steve.

"No, Cap didn't come with me. He appeared as a babysitter like you here. You can both walk where you came from. I'll fly back to the compound," Tony explained.

"Dude, welcome to Tony's babysitter club. I tell you that it doesn't pay well. You have to put up with many tantrums and spoils on his part," Rhodey said now addressing Steve who was clearly holding himself not to laugh.

“Fuck off, both of you,” Tony said storming out of the room, and he could hear them laughing while he was going down the stairs. He found himself with a smile on his face too.

_ _ _ _ _


	3. Chapter 3

“You are the first who says _ follow the rules_, and when you break them it is OK because?” Tony was fighting with Steve while entering the meeting room. The team was gathering to talk about what they should do next after that day mission.

“Jesus, Tony, you like to put your life at risk, I then cover you, and you want to call that breaking the rules. That makes no sense.” Steve said exasperated.

“You have to trust me more! You couldn't be sure it wouldn't work!” Tony replied raising his hands up in his own gesture of exasperation.

“What happened with the old couple there?” Rhodey asked Natasha pointing at Tony and Steve.

"Marriage problems, you know, the usual. Maybe we could order something to eat. Those two are going to be like that for a while." Natasha replied.

"Nebula and Rocket will be here at the end of the month; they contacted." Bruce said trying to talk over Steve and Tony's argument. "I wish Thor would come too. I tried talking to him, but despite having his people safe, he doesn't seem very happy."

"What about Barton?" Rhodey asked Natasha.

"Nothing. But I know I can get him. I've done it other times," Natasha said wistfully. "Boys, please, can you stop now? We could have the meeting, and then you continue fighting of who cares more for the other."

Natasha's words finally put a stop to the discussion. They sat reluctantly, and she connected the rest of the team.

_ _ _ _ _ 

Tony was done running on the treadmill. It felt pretty good to drain all the energy he had left exercising. They had had a rather complicated day, but also the fight with Steve left him quite exhausted. _ What a stubborn man! _ He was not a saint either, but for God's sake, that man sometimes took him out of his right mind. He went to the gym sauna, with that, his day would definitely be complete.

And of course Steve had to be there too. Tony hadn't noticed him before on the machines so he thought he wasn't there. OK, there would be no problem. They were two adults and their conversation had not ended so badly. Tony sat in front of Steve who was with his head against the wall and his eyes closed; he did not flinch at the entrance of another person. Maybe it was for the best, he told himself.

Tony tried to relax, but with Steve's presence there it was becoming impossible. _ Why did Steve use such a small towel? _ He had to remind Friday to buy bigger towels; maybe it was Steve was very tall and big, and the towel seems small to him. _ Shit, what was he saying? _He didn't know why he couldn't stop looking at Steve. Obviously he had seen his body before. The tights he used did not leave much to the imagination. Now seeing him almost naked, because that towel did not cover much. Tony could not stop staring. The sauna had not been a good idea, he thought. He decided to close his eyes and try to focus on something else instead Steve's sweaty body. Only a few minutes passed, and he felt Steve moved.

"Tony, I'm sorry for today" Steve was in front of him with his _ very _small towel.

Tony opened his eyes, and it didn't help at all that Steve was so close. "I apologize too," Tony said with a tremor in his voice that nothing had to do with the fight that day.

"I trust you," Steve said with a half smile and extending his hand.

Tony took Steve's hand and nodded wanting to speak, but the words didn't come out. He didn't know what was happening to him. Then Steve did something that caused Tony's heart to beat desperately. When holding Tony's hand, Steve gently stroked it with his thumb while staring into his eyes. And then Tony knew, that day was Steve next to his bed, and it hadn't been a dream. He didn't know why he could recognize his hand and that caress. Steve turned around and left the sauna. Tony again felt the same emptiness he had felt that day. _ What was that? _

_ _ _ _ _ 

  
  


"It's a pretty big risk Bruce, are you sure you want to do it?" Tony asked. Both were in Bruce's lab discussing a plan that had occurred to him.

"I need to try. At the end, Hulk is not only a part of me. It's me. And I strongly believe I could reconcile both sides." Bruce responded confidently.

"I will help you in all that I can. I am here for you," Tony said smiling.

"Thanks Tony, I knew you would understand. I don't think it's easy. But it's a journey I'm willing to have," Bruce said, nodding.

"I completely removed it from Pepper, but in doing so I understood what was wrong with Killian version. If we implant it, I'm pretty confident it will work." Tony said with conviction.

Tony had explained Bruce about Extremis, the advanced form of genetic manipulation created by Hansen and Killian. Bruce's idea was to unite the strength of Hulk with his mind, to become one. And for that, they would inject into Bruce's brain a bit of the Extremis formula and thus achieve the fusion of the two personalities. It was a pretty big risk, but Tony could understand Bruce's struggle, and he felt committed to help him in whatever way he could.

"We need to find everything to replicate the formula. Maybe it will be a bit complicated, but eventually we will do it," Tony explained trying again to assure Bruce he was with him completely.

"Thanks again. I appreciate all your help," Bruce said with a warm smile. "By the way, tomorrow they want to make a dinner. Nat would say it's a party. Will you be there?

"Ah, yeah, sure," Tony replied looking at the screen with concentration.

Tony's mind immediately moved to the scene of few weeks ago in the sauna. In spite of everything, nothing had changed between Steve and him. If anything, they seemed to get along better or at least they finished their fights in less time. However, since that day something changed for him. Tony felt like a stupid teenager although he was too old for those behaviors. But sometimes when he was alone with Steve, he felt nervous. His defense mechanism was to talk too much, and despite Steve found funny everything he said, that blessed smile didn't help at all. Steve proximity was noticeable at all times, and many times he felt like the place was hot even when the weather could prove otherwise. What a shame his old self, _ the playboy,_ would feel. But Tony knew everything was a strange way of him to be distracted by something. Every day and in every moment he thought about Pepper. The pain seemed unbeatable, endless, but then he had those moments with Steve served to escape the inevitable reality. On one side, Tony was sure he was creating a fantasy to cope with the loss. On the other hand, he did not know if he was doing more harm to himself.

_ _ _ _ _ 

The image before his eyes looked like a scene from the old days. Everyone was gathered in the room talking cheerfully. As he walked, Tony let the nostalgia and sadness seizes him just for an instant. They weren't all there, not the whole team, not Pepper. However, everyone could have that moment and enjoy it. In his heart, there was a trace of gratitude he could also recognize.

"Stark, my friend, I missed you so much!" Thor told him with enthusiasm.

"We met last week, Point Break, don't be dramatic," Tony said jokingly.

"Oh, only heaven knows you missed me too, and you don't want to admit it." Thor threw himself into an effusive hug, and Tony couldn't help it.

Everyone was very worried about Thor and with good reason. He had tormented himself because of what happened in Wakanda. At first, he refused to talk to anyone, but they kept insisting. Tony knew all they had to do was to be there with him, be a support and make him see he was not alone. It was quite complicated to try to help someone who felt broken when sharing the same grief. But as Rhodey had helped him, Tony felt compelled to make Thor see that he was not guilty of anything. None of them were, and now after what happened, they had each other. And that was the only thing that mattered.

"Well, we need a good speech and there is no one better for it than Rogers. Please go to the center of the room," Natasha said raising the beer in her hand.

They all laughed and cheered on Steve. Tony had to prove Romanoff right. Cap was good with speeches.

"I'm really not that good," Steve said blushing. 

“Cap, Cap, Cap” everyone cheered now.

“OK, stop, I'll do it,” Steve said standing from the sofa. He went to the middle of the room and with a sigh began to speak. "We must be grateful to be together. It has not been easy for any of us to be here today sharing something that was once as simple as a smile. It is a long road that we continue to travel every day. We continue being brave with ourselves. _Rescuing _ourselves every moment we fall, but deciding we will continue fighting our own fears because we deserve this world. Having each other is the best gift we can have, and we must enjoy every moment shared... So, for those who are not here, but will always be in our hearts. And for us I toast.”

First there was a silence, as if Steve's speech had touched each of them in the deepest. Soon after, everyone applauded. Tony could not help the way a strange sensation overwhelmed his heart. He had always admired that deep-rooted optimism with which Steve could live his days. He was a born leader, not only with his actions, but also with his words he knew how to reach everyone. He had never met someone as brave as him, a person who fought for the good of all because that was the right thing to do. He was a truly hero, he thought while watching him rapt. But Tony must have been staring at him for a long time because Steve seemed to notice and turned to see him. Before long, their eyes connected to each other, and the room vanished so only the two of them existed. And likewise, after a few seconds the harsh and cruel reality made an appearance when someone approached Steve and stood between them. Better go with Rhodey for a drink, Tony told himself. 

_ _ _ _ _

“And what about you and the hammers?” Rhodey asked Thor "It's getting bigger every time; trying to make up for something?" he joked.

Thor laughed, "I lost my other hammer because of my sister, the goddess of death, she broke it with her hands," he explained.

"Your sister is the goddess of death?" Natasha asked surprised.

"Yes, Banner and I fought her, right my friend?" Thor turned to Bruce, "I even lost an eye because of her, but thanks to my other friend here, Rabbit, I have my vision back"

"You still owe me; you'll pay me back," Rocket told him.

"A rather peculiar family if you ask me" Bruce turned to Tony smiling.

"I think so." Tony laughed. "I'm going for a beer, do you want one?"

"Yes, thanks," Bruce replied.

Tony went for the beers, and he couldn't help looking for where Steve was. Tony had not addressed him all night and looking at the room, he saw him next to a blonde girl. The same who had stood between them a couple of hours ago. She was talking very cheerfully with him. Well, if he was honest with himself, it was pretty obvious she was flirting with Steve.

"That's Shannon, Peggy's niece." Natasha told him appearing out of nowhere as usual.

"Yeah, I think I know her," Tony said playing selfless, but he knew Natasha had captured him watching her.

"Steve liked her, but I think he lost interest," Natasha said emphasizing like it was very obvious.

"And why are we talking about this?" Tony said trying to maintain disinterest.

"I don't know. I thought you might be interested to know," Natasha replied with too much mischief. She took one of the beers Tony had in his hands and turned around.

Tony couldn't help but be surprise by Natasha. _ How had she noticed? Shit, was he really that obvious? _Because if something he was sure, it was that she didn't say it for the blonde girl. What mess he was getting into, he had to stop. He headed back to where the rest was.

"Stark, take a toast with me!," Thor said serving him a shot. "You are of my kind. You can handle this" bringing the drink to Tony.

"If I were you, I wouldn't drink that," Bruce warned him when Tony gave him one of the beers.

Tony took the shot, he thought about it a second. "Cheers," he told Thor and drank it. It was true, the drink wasn't that strong, he thought.

"Cheers!," Thor said effusively. "Come on, who else dares to drink?" he asked.

"I will" Steve's voice was heard approaching.

And Tony told himself he simply would ignore his heartbeats. Yep, his heart could desperately beat. He would just ignore it.

"Wonderful!" Thor replied even happier, and served him a drink.

"Cheers," Steve said, looking into Tony eyes.

No, Tony wasn't feeling anything.

"I'll have a drink," Nebula said too.

"My lady, your wishes are orders," Thor said pleased.

After a few games and more beers, Tony felt he needed some fresh air and headed to one of the gardens. Besides, Thor and his trick drink did blunt his head. He shouldn't have listened to him. He walked until he reached the center of the garden and closed his eyes as he tried feeling the floor was not spinning.

"Admiring the starry sky or taking some air due to Thor's drink?" Steve was by his side, and Tony hadn't realized when he arrived.

"You don't know the way everything around me is spinning right now," Tony said opening only one eye. He didn't want to accept that Steve's presence wouldn't help him feel better now.

Steve laughed. "Apparently Nat is the only one who has been unaffected by the drink, and for me, she cheated us all and didn't really drink."

Tony smiled, "I believe you. But you're the lucky one, alcohol doesn't affect you."

"I wouldn't call it luck. It was fun," Steve told him with a nostalgic smile.

Tony's eyes fell on Steve's lips for a moment, and he couldn't help biting his own. _ Yes, he was drunk. _"What else do you miss?" Tony said trying to focus on the garden.

"From the past, you mean?" Steve asked.

"Yes," Tony replied.

"I think I lived missing everything, all the time. It wasn't nostalgia. I wanted everything to be as before. And after many stumbles, one day I realized I had to learn to live in this present." Steve told him thoughtfully.

"That must have been difficult," Tony said with a sigh, "But perhaps the only good thing about not being able to get drunk is not going through the hangover."

"You for sure have some tips for that," Steve said teasing.

"If you knew so, but they involve more alcohol, then I don't know how much we can call it help," Tony replied grinning.

Steve laughed, and Tony thought how good it felt to make him smile.

"Do you feel good where you are now?" Tony said looking into his eyes.

"I do," Steve said with an intense look that made Tony felt too weak, especially after so many beers.

"I better..." Tony tried to say he better go back inside. But he turned around very quickly and almost falls if it wasn't for Steve who took him by the waist to hold him. It seemed an eternity, the instant when Steve took him close to his body, and their faces were a few inches from each other. Tony could feel Steve's breath as his eyes looked at him with an unknown desire. "Steve," he heard himself say with a sigh.

"My fellow friends, you need to come inside! There is still plenty of mead for you," Thor was shouting from afar, and apparently had not noticed the scenario in front of him. Tony tried, as much as he could, to separate himself from Steve without falling. All of the sudden, Thor was in the middle of them placing his arms in each of theirs necks and taking them inside.

"You both have to visit me more often in New Asgard. I could introduce you to some pretty girls over there," Thor kept talking excited, and definitely unnoticed of what just happened. Tony couldn't see Steve to the face, and when they entered the lounge again, he immediately went to where Rhodey was.

_ _ _ _ _

The next morning, Tony was drinking coffee in his lab, and he couldn't stop thinking about what had happened the night before. The talks, the drinks, the games had continued until late and when everyone went home, they looked quite happy, so to speak. He avoided being alone with Steve, and it was easy for him to continue sharing with others. He knew avoiding him was not something he could do forever and should not do if he considered himself an adult. Tony was fully aware he was attracted to Steve, but that was all. The fantasy could not continue when he dragged Steve into it. _ Why had he looked at him that way _? No, that should not continue, and nothing will happen beyond that. He promised himself without further explanation. They were unnecessary.

_ _ _ _ _ 


	4. Chapter 4

"Good morning boys," Natasha said to Bruce and Tony who were talking in the kitchen discussing their advance in the Extremis formula.

"Morning," Nebula said in her particular coldness walking behind Natasha.

Natasha took milk from the fridge, cereal and two bowls from the cabinet. "Do you want coffee? She asked Nebula who nodded. “Some of the gentlemen are kind enough to serve us two cups of coffee?" Natasha turned to them again.

Tony smiled, “Morning,” he replied. Honestly, Natasha was amazing. He took care of serving the coffee, and Nebula took the cups and followed her.

"Is that what I think it is?" Bruce said in amazement.

Tony laughed, "I don't know, it could be. It's Romanoff."

"Did Nebula speak to you when you were together on the ship? She looks very serious," Bruce asked now intrigued.

"Blue meanie? She looks tough, but she's too good. Maybe a bit sadistic. God, that put an image in my mind that I don't want to have," Tony said, frowning.

Bruce laughed heartily, "OK, we better continue with our thing."

At that moment Steve entered the kitchen, "Good morning."

"Good morning, Steve," Bruce replied, "You can't imagine what we just witnessed," he said smiling.

"Cap," Tony said looking into his eyes.

"What happened?" Steve looked at them with curiosity.

"Nothing, here our friend was surprised because _ maybe _Romanoff woke up with a blue friend in her arms," Tony said smiling.

"Oh," Steve replied in amazement, but only for a second. "It's Natasha," then he replied smiling.

"Tony said the same," Bruce smiled, nodding at Tony.

Then Steve looked at him, and everything Tony said to himself a few hours ago seemed to lose its relevance at that look.

"I will travel this afternoon to Wakanda as we talked," Steve said, still looking at Tony.

"Perfect, Rhodey will go to London tomorrow too. I'm sorry we stay here, but we need to finish the formula," Bruce said, pointing to Tony.

"Sure, please be careful," Steve replied to Bruce with concern in his voice.

"Everything will be fine, let's trust that these two brains think better than one," Bruce nodded.

"Take care of yourself too," Tony told Steve feeling that strange sensation of emptiness.

"It won't be long," Steve told him like if he had read his mind. "We will connect tomorrow at noon."

"Well, good trip," Bruce said, placing his hand on Steve's shoulder as he left the kitchen.

"Cap," was the only thing Tony could say while following Bruce.

_ _ _ _ _ 

A week passed and the progress in the Extremis formula was quite good. However, Tony and Bruce decided that it would be better to do the procedure when Steve and Thor were with them. They did not want to risk a Hulk previously determined to not come out, now would like to do so. Tony couldn't imagine the giant's fury if that happened, but he already had experience that it didn't end well at all. Better not take chances.

On the other hand, the world order that everyone aspired was getting a little more complicated. It was not only to help the police with the simple robberies and the occasional fights. But street bands also began to circulate with contraband of medicines, food, all kinds of supplies. One would think it didn't make sense in those times to happen, more now that they were less in the world. It was as if human beings loved to complicate their lives to have something to always be busy with. And speaking of complicating life, there was Tony. Missing his fantasy's relief and Pepper at the same time. _ How could that be possible? _Pepper's birthday would be within 2 days. All he could think about was how terrible he felt because before he almost never remembered that day. Now it was so present to torment him with the fact she wasn't there.

_ _ _ _ _

"How you feel?" Bruce asked Tony. Both were in Bruce's lab, the formula was almost ready.

"Sorry?" Tony asked touching one of the screens.

"Well, I'm not very good with this. I think I once told you that I'm not that kind of doctor. But in these last days I see you a little, I don't know if sad is the right word, which is normal too," Bruce explained him.

"Yeah, agree to both. But if I'm honest, sometimes I don't know how to continue when I feel drowned in sadness. I always seek to distract myself with things, like this, helping you comes in handy.” Tony tried to explain.

“Could you describe that sadness?” Bruce asked shyly. 

Tony sighed, “Well, it's like a strange mist from where I see everything," Tony replied as if that explained it all. But Bruce looked at him encouraging him to keep talking, and Tony took a deep breath.

"Sometimes I see the days sombered even when the sun is out there. It is like my life loses all its brightness and everything remains grim; people, places, voices. All the experiences I live lose their color, the meaning," Tony said staring blankly, "Wow, it looks like I was waiting for someone to ask me," he said trying to smile.

"It's not easy. I understand you because I've been there," Bruce said sympathetically, "But Tony, for now the distraction may work, but inevitably one day you'll have to forgive yourself and forgive her to be able to move on."

"It seems like a very long road," Tony said with melancholy in his voice.

"With time, it seems a cliche to say it, but with time" Bruce looked at him with a kind smile.

"Thanks, I didn't know how much I was needing to talk about this," Tony said gratefully. "To not be that kind of doctor, you did it quite well," and both laughed.

_ _ _ _ _ 

The day had come. Pepper's birthday. Tony had decided to spend the weekend in the cabin they had bought. He was having a beer sitting in the courtyard that overlooked the lake. His thoughts were going to that day in which Pepper and him spoke that if they decided to have children it would be perfect to live there. How life would have been with her in that place, he wondered. The house was beautiful and quite large, and perhaps one of the best things it had was the lake so close. _ Happy birthday, Pep, _Tony said bringing the beer to his mouth. Suddenly, he heard as if cars were entering the cabin. It seemed strange to him, he had told Banner he would come there over the weekend but he didn't think anyone else knew. He got up and went to the front door. Getting out of two cars was Natasha, Bruce, Rhodey, Thor and _ Steve_. Tony wanted to be upset, he told Bruce he needed that weekend alone and had barely spent a day there and now almost the whole team was there too. It was something to be upset, but it was impossible to hide the smile on his face when he saw them getting out of the cars.

"Impossible to be alone one weekend. Banner, I lost all my trust in you" Tony said trying to hide his smile while shaking his head.

"Stark, I love this house!" Thor went to Tony and hugged him with his usual effusiveness.

"I like you like it," Tony said trying to breathe in Thor's hug.

"Well, we brought everything for the grill," Natasha said, passing directly to the house.

"I'm sorry Tony. They threatened me if I didn't say where you were," Bruce told him trying to seem ashamed and followed Natasha inside the house.

"It's all good, right?" Rhodey said looking at him with concern.

Tony smiled, "It was until you came invading my place of peace."

"Tell me your _ place of peace _ has some cold beers," Rhodey said jokingly, and entering the house also.

"Cap," said Tony. Only the two of them were left at the entrance.

"Tony, I'm glad to see you," Steve said with a soft smile on his lips.

"Me too. You arranged everything in Wakanda. Did you have a good trip?" Tony asked.

"Pretty normal on the way there. The return with Thor and his stories, funny," Steve smiled, "Bruce told me you finished the formula."

"Yeah, but we need two supermen to deal with any green adversity," Tony said grinning.

"We will help you," Steve nodded smiling, then Rhodey returned to the door with a beer in his hand.

"Why you had kept this place for yourself, it's amazing," Rhodey said taking a drink of his beer.

"Let's go inside, I'll do the tour," Tony said pleased. Absurd to be upset with friends like that.

_ _ _ _ _

"I vote for The Godfather," Natasha said.

"I haven't seen that one," said Steve.

"God, it can't be that you haven't seen The Godfather," Bruce said in amazement. "It's one of the best movies in the history of cinema," he said excitedly.

Tony watched them discuss what movie watch. Thor and Rhodey talked very entertainingly in the kitchen. They had had a very pleasant afternoon, much better than his morning plans had been. They made a barbecue, drank beers and Tony couldn't feel more grateful. Even with Steve everything was very normal, he explained Tony about the projects they were going to run along with Wakanda. And Tony told him about how Bruce's procedure would be. At the end, everyone ate, joked and had a good time. Pepper's birthday was not so sad after all. Tony hoped she could also feel all the blitheness he could feel at that moment.

"What do you think?" Natasha asked Tony when she saw him approach.

"The Godfather, there should be no other choice," Tony said flatly and sat on one of the sofas.

With a couple of minutes left to end the movie, Tony turned to see Steve. He had fallen asleep. Maybe he was tired from the trip, he thought.

"He insisted on coming, even when we told him he should rest from the trip," Natasha addressed Tony speaking very softly.

"Thanks for doing this," Tony told her knowing that maybe Natasha wasn't very expressive, but he needed to tell her.

"We are a family," Natasha said with a sweet smile. Tony smiled her back, and he knew that would be one of the very few times she would let herself be seen without her hard shell. "I take the big guy here. You wake him up and show Rogers _ his _room," Natasha said with a mischievous smile as she pointed to Bruce that was also asleep on the sofa.

"Big guy, let's go to bed," Natasha stroked Bruce's face, he woke up with a smile and followed her.

Tony saw them leave the living room and wondered where Rhodey and Thor were because at some point he lost sight of them. Steve was still asleep resting his head on his hand over the arm of the sofa. How he would like to wake him up with the same caresses and whispers he had heard from him that day. Steve_, my fantasy_. He had missed it, the only resource that made him feel good in so much pain. Tony got up and placed himself in front of Steve.

"Rogers," Tony said, but he seemed not to hear it. He cleared his throat, "Wake up, Cap," he insisted and this time he woke up.

"Pff, I'm sorry. I fell asleep," Steve said rubbing his eyes.

"Yes, you must be tired with the week you had. Come on, I'll show you your room," Tony said, nodding.

Steve followed him to the second floor where there were several rooms. Without thinking, or so he wanted to think, Tony pointed the room next to his.

"I think it has everything in the closet. Towels, sheets, blankets, but anything you need I am here next door," Tony told him, trying to speak very objectively, of course he was not implying anything by telling him that his room was just next door.

"Thank you," Steve said. "I brought you something from Wakanda, but it's in my bag downstairs," he said, blushing intensely.

"Oh," Tony replied surprised. "What did you bring me? Now I want it."

Steve laughed softly, "It's a silly thing. I'll give it to you tomorrow," he said, still blushing.

"Well that's not fair, I wouldn't make you wait so long to give you something you want," Tony told him complaining.

"Are you sure?" Steve asked with a fierce in his gaze that made Tony's body shiver completely.

"I..." Tony began saying, but Rhodey's and Thor's footsteps interfered.

"I tell you one thing, don't trust this guy and his drink. I was fine until I tried that thing again," Rhodey said in a drunken voice.

"It's a drink for the brave, my friend," said Thor smiling.

"OK, pall, I better take you to your room. Thor, that's yours." Tony said taking Rhodey and pointing Thor´s room. He turned to see Steve, "Good night, Cap."

"Good night, Tony," Steve replied.

_ _ _ _ _ 

_ I am sure_. He wanted to say. Tony was turning back and forth in his bed without being able to sleep. He wanted to go and return that look to Steve, and not only that. For God's sake, he wanted to devour him and that was driving him crazy. Images of the sauna came to his mind and lodged in the lower part of his body. He couldn't keep up with Steve's burning looks of desire. That couldn't be his own fantasy if Steve looked at him that way too. He didn't want to reason, and didn't want to meditate if what he felt was right or wrong. He just wanted to get out of the already painful erection he had just thinking about Steve.

He took his cock in his hand and had to silence the moan he let out with the pillow. Fuck, he needed that so much, he thought. It had been so long since he had an erection that he even thought perhaps he was having a problem. But now he was completely sure _ that _ was not his problem. The real problem was in the room next to his. _ Shit_, it was so easy to get rid of that towel in his imagination and see Steve completely naked. Tony wanted to lick every inch of that body, touch it, caress it and watch him moan. _ Steve, could you groan for me?_ Tony was touching himself desperately, he needed to end the agony of wanting Steve with all his might. Another groan.

Tony hoped nobody would have heard him. He thought he felt the echo of his orgasm throughout the entire house. A few minutes later, the feeling was still there. God, he was lost and did not know how to return. _ Why hadn't it worked just with that relief? _It wasn't enough, he thought. _ What the hell does he wanted? _He continued questioning himself. Suddenly, Tony realized he missed _ him, _not the fantasy. And the guilt and the shame made an appearance once again. He was there because he wanted to be alone on Pepper's birthday and ended the day thinking only of Steve_. _Tony couldn't recognize himself anymore.

_ _ _ _ _ 


	5. Chapter 5

"We're sure this is going to work, right Stark?" Thor asked Tony worried. They were in the surgery room attending Bruce's procedure. It was a pretty surreal situation they were there to see how the Extremis formula would be injected into Bruce brain. They had to be close in case of any eventuality and Tony was pretty sure there would be one. So far everything had been going pretty well, but Cho had only sedated him.

"I am sure," Tony told him by slapping him on the shoulder. He then looked at Steve who nodded.

"He's ready," said Cho. At first, it was difficult to convince her, but she also understood Bruce's situation and agreed to carry out the procedure. "Whenever you say."

Tony took a deep breath, "Do it."

Cho started injecting the formula and everyone was holding their breath. They looked how the liquid was disappearing from the syringe and entering Bruce's brain. A minute later and Cho was withdrawing the syringe.

"Doctor, we need you to leave the room," Tony said cautiously.

Cho nodded. And Thor, Steve and Tony saw how the wound the doctor had opened to inject the formula began to heal itself. Tony knew the regeneration was working, but what he didn't know what was going on in Bruce's mind at the moment. Suddenly, Banner's body began shaking as his skin began to turn green.

"Suit up," Steve told Tony.

Tony tapped his reactor, and the Iron man suit covered him.

"What is happening, why doesn't he wake up?" Thor asked seeing how Bruce's entire body was still turning green but Bruce didn't wake up.

"He will, but we just need those two to come to an understanding," Tony said confidently.

Bruce opened his eyes and everyone stood on guard after the heartbreaking scream that was heard.

"Bruce, are you alright?" Steve asked trying to get close.

Bruce, who was already starting to look more like Hulk got out of bed. He seemed to be fully aware, but it wasn't Bruce.

"Banner," shouted Hulk, very very angry. "Banner," and he began to throw everything around him.

"Shit," Tony said. "Come on Bruce. You can do it, buddy." He was dodging Hulk throws.

"Hey my friend, it is me!" Thor said, "Remember me?" and Hulk turned to see him breathing hard.

"No friend! No Banner!" He yelled even more angrily and tried to punch Thor. However, although everyone prepared to help him. Hulk grabbed his own head and started screaming in pain.

"No!" Hulk screamed and fell to his knees as he grabbed his head breathing desperately.

"Bruce please, come on," Steve said trying to get close again.

Hulk placed his hands on the floor while still breathing hard. The three were around waiting.

"I'm fine," and it was Bruce's voice in a body that was still Hulk's. Tony was next to him immediately.

"Bruce, hey, are you alright? Is that you?" Tony said worried, kneeling in front of him.

"Yes, it's me," Bruce said, catching his breath and looking into Tony eyes.

"Fuck, it worked," Tony said sighing and smiling at the same time. "It's not that I thought it wouldn't work, but it's a relief."

"Bruce, what a fright," Steve said helping him to get up.

"Come on, my friend," Thor took Bruce by the other arm to help him too.

"I will need to buy big clothes now," Bruce tried to joke.

"I know a tailor," Tony said smiling.

_ _ _ _ _ 

"The main point of contact where everything is being distributed is from this small town in Honduras," Steve said, pointing to the location on the screen.

Part of the team was in the meeting room discussing about the smuggling that was taking place in different areas of the country. After Bruce's procedure, Tony and almost the entire team had not found rest between so many missions. When they believed everything was getting better, new complications were evident. The medicine smuggling problem was increasing every day, but they had found the place where the criminal organization was hiding.

"We need to reach the mines from where everything that is smuggled to the rest of the countries is hidden. Most are medicines, but there are armed groups that guard them," Steve continued.

"We must keep in mind many of the people there, are civilians. They are in forced labor, so we have to be very careful," Rhodey said firmly.

"Our goal, contain, not attack," said Steve looking at Rhodey who nodded. "We will leave early tomorrow. It will be better for everyone to rest tonight."

_ _ _ _ _

One mission after another and Tony couldn't be more grateful for the distraction. At night he was so tired that he managed to sleep without nightmares, which was a gift from heaven. There was also the situation with Steve, both of them so focused on work. Neither of them seemed to have time to think about anything else, and that was a relief to Tony. After Pepper's birthday, he had felt very guilty. But within the days he realized he could not torture himself. It was unfair. Anyway, better that way, work and occupy the mind, he told himself. It was definitely the best thing that could happen to him.

The next morning, the team was flying to the zone they discussed the day before. They were around a table seeing on the screen the map of the mines to determine where it was the best place to enter.

"We should get in here, if they have a security explosive. It will be easier for us to reach this exit," Steve pointed out to Tony on the screen.

"I agree, but there will be no containment if this area falls, Cap. And that is worrying enough," said Tony, looking at the screen with concentration.

"What do you think we can do?" Rhodey asked.

"We need to split the team with wings to get out of there," Tony said, widening the screen. "From here we should try to get out, in any case." Tony pointed a zone in the map.

"OK then it's Natasha, Rhodey and Shannon for this entry," Steve said "Tony and I for this one and Bruce will be on the jet."

"Too big yet to go unnoticed huh," Rhodey joked.

"I heard that," Bruce said from the copilot seat.

"Apparently this could be the depots," Shannon said. She put a hand on Steve's shoulder to lean on and point the area.

_ Good move,_ Tony thought. His eyes met Steve's the moment Shannon put her hand on his shoulder. And Tony did nothing but look down. Well, they had to focus on the task and were within hours of arriving.

"How many civilians can be there?" Natasha asked.

"About 50 people," Shannon replied.

"We will prioritize extracting them," said Steve, looking at Natasha who nodded.

An hour later, the teams had split and Tony and Steve were heading to their entry point. There were several armed men guarding the entrance.

"We need to surround that area, go left, see you at the entrance," Steve told Tony.

"Your call," Tony answered and followed Steve instructions.

It had passed 20 minutes and Tony and Steve were inside the mines taking the workers out of that area. They were attacked but they could contain them. Apparently, everything was going better than they expected or that they believed until an alarm was activated.

"Shit, it's the adjoining area. Rhodey do you hear us?" Tony said but there was no answer.

"Nat, do you hear us?" Steve asked, and an explosion was heard. "Tony you need to get there. I will tell Bruce to help me with the civilians."

"I'm on my way," Tony said, flying to the other side of the mines.

Indeed, the worst thing Tony had imagined was happening. Part of the mines had exploded and the land began to give way. He approached the place of the explosion that was on fire and managed to see an area to access. Without thinking twice he entered. Everything was collapsed, full of dust.

"Rhodey? Tony asked unanswered. He kept walking and found himself facing a stones wall from where he heard murmurs from the other side. People were trapped on the other side.

"Friday, do a scan of the place. If I remove these stones, how much time will I have to spend on the other side and leave?" Tony asked.

"1 minute 27 seconds, before it collapses completely, Sir." the AI replied.

"Oh, that's enough. It's my lucky day, isn't it?" Tony said trying to joke.

Tony blasted the stones and passed as fast as he could. At the other side, Rhodey and Shannon were trapped with three civilians.

"Rhodey, we have about 40 seconds to get them out. Where the hell is Romanoff?" Tony asked him in dismay.

"I take them. Nat went to the depots," Rhodey replied, and both took the civilians and Shannon as fast as they could.

Once outside, they headed to Steve and Bruce and several of the civilians grouped together.

"Where is Nat?" Bruce asked worried.

"She went to the depots," Rhodey said and another explosion was heard.

"Come on Rhodey. I'm going to need you," Tony said flying back to the site.

"Please, Tony, be careful," Steve said.

"When I've been a risky madman, Cap? Tony said jokingly.

When Tony approached the depots, he again asked Friday where to enter. The AI replied they had two entry possibilities, but it would be better if each one entered one at a time.

"Am I disconnected from the others?" Tony asked Friday.

"Yes, Sir," Friday replied.

"Tell me, where will be less time to go out?" Tony asked.

"The one on the right, sir," replied the AI.

"Rhodey, go to the left." Tony told Rhodey.

After a few minutes of agonizing wait, Tony and Rhodey were together with Natasha and five civilians regrouping with the rest. The local police, firefighters and ambulances had also arrived at the scene. Together they collaborated to take care of the injured and help with the landslides. They had caught several leaders of the criminal organization. However, the rescue of civilians, although some with injuries, really considered the mission successful.

_ _ _ _ _

Back on the plane, everyone was quite tired. All that remained was to heal the wounds and rest. The mission was accomplished. Although for someone in particular there seemed to be no tiredness, or at least Steve's constant furtive glances at Tony, made him think. When they arrived at the compound, some of them went to the infirmary while Tony and Steve stayed at the entrance.

"What's wrong, Cap?," Tony asked intrigued, "What bothers you?"

"Why did you turn off the earpiece?" Steve asked.

"How do you know?" Tony asked raising an eyebrow.

"I tried talking to you," Steve replied.

"We were in the middle of some explosions, Cap, things don't always work," Tony tried to explain.

"Tony," Steve asked impatiently.

"I asked Friday what was the least dangerous path, so Rhodey could go that way," Tony said with a sigh.

"I was afraid you would say that," Steve said looking at the floor.

"It was the only way, Cap. We both had to go through. If we hadn't done it that way we wouldn't have been able to get all them out the way we did," Tony explained calmly.

"OK, I understand,” Steve said looking at him as if he knew something Tony didn't. “You must rest, Tony. We better talk tomorrow, good night," Steve said and headed towards the gym area.

"OK, night," Tony watched him go. _ What had happened? What had he said?. _ Tony hesitated for a minute, but then thought he needed to find out and went to the gym.

Steve was shirtless in front of one of the lockers. Now it doesn't seem like a good idea, Tony thought.

"What did I do this time?" Tony said trying to focus on Steve's eyes.

"It's better if we talk tomorrow, Tony. We're both tired. We can think things better," Steve said as he placed a towel over his shoulder.

"He is my friend, and I did put my life in danger for him. You would have done it for all of us, wouldn't you?" Tony said starting to get irritated.

"It's not about that Tony, and I know you cannot see it," Steve said with a sigh.

"Fuck, then tell me what it is? You said you trusted me, but still questioning what I did. Doesn't seem like it!" Tony said annoyed.

"It's also not about me not trusting you, Tony," Steve said calmly and taking a deep breath. "I once told you, you were not the guy to make the sacrifice play, and I clearly remember your answer. _I would just cut the wire_. That's you Tony, the genius, the witty, the man of daring and risky ideas. Yes, but so bright that they always work," Steve explained.

"Thanks for the flattery, Cap, but I don't see the point," Tony interrupted him.

"Did you think of another option that wasn't to sacrifice yourself?" Steve asked.

"Wait a minute, do you think I wanted to end my life?" Tony laughed sarcastically.

"No, I don't think so, Tony. That would be a conscious act. But I do understand that point where we sometimes get lost and we no longer know who we are. We give ourselves so little value, that our lives that seem to be only agony and pain, become less important than those of others," Steve said with a deep sadness in his eyes.

Steve's words felt like lightnings that were breaking Tony into pieces. He felt naked, bewildered, as if the world could be more cruel than it was already. It could not be true, Tony wanted to think. Then, Bruce's words came to his mind. _You have to forgive yourself_, and an immense pain gripped his heart.

"You're right. I must go to rest," Tony said, looking at the floor.

Tony turned to leave, but Steve took him by the arm. He turned him around and was in front of him very close when he spoke. "We care about you Tony. _I _care about you," Steve said with pain in his voice. "I want you to know I am here for you. I want to help you."

Tony stared at him and his heart no longer beat in despair when he looked at Steve. There was something else that embrace him, a sweet devotion. Steve was no longer an exciting fantasy. He was his _ friend_, who cared for him, _ saw _him, knew him even in his weaknesses. He recognized the worst version of himself, and yet he was there telling him he wanted to help him. 

"Thanks," It was the only thing Tony could say and turned again to leave the gym.

_ _ _ _ _

The next morning, Tony was in his lab reviewing a design he had about a recycling project. During the night, Steve's words had been an echo that remained for a long time. He had not recognized it before, but it was true. Sometimes he gave up in a considerable _ bizarre _ way and lost himself along the road. Now Tony understood why Steve didn't want to talk about it. It wasn't a very light conversation, but Steve was right. Trying to comprehend himself, Tony wandered about his behavior and the way he coped with sadness. He understood he had to do something he liked, he was passionate about. It occurred to him it had to be more about motivation than distraction, if he could truly understand Bruce's words. He needed to use his time in something that was his own, his purpose. Hard to accept, but he was grateful Steve had helped him see it. And what more than engineering and retake one of those projects he always wanted to do but thought he had no time before.

"Good morning," Steve said at the door.

"Good morning, Cap,» Tony said with a soft smile.

"Did you get some rest?» Steve asked.

"If I am honest. It was a little difficult at first, but eventually I got to sleep. No all nights you can have an _ insight _of your life like that," Tony explained him smiling.

"I did not want to make you feel worse," Steve said with concern.

"You didn't. It wasn't easy I must say, but I needed that. It is very complicated to try to get out of a well you didn't know you had fallen." Tony said looking into his eyes trying to make Steve understand he was not upset with him. "But I must thank you. At least it is start, recognize it."

"I'm here for you," Steve replied with a warm smile and now looking more relax. «What are you up to? 

"As I told you, it is a start. Last night it occurred to me it would be a good idea to finish one of the projects I had always been passionate about. Here look," Tony replied feeling great satisfaction while pointing one of his designs.

They spent the rest of the morning discussing Tony's projects, and Steve offered to help him in whatever way he could. Tony liked being able to share with Steve that way. It felt good to know they were truly friends. He could feel like a storm had been very close to him, but now it seemed to slowly move away.

_ _ _ _ _


	6. Chapter 6

_ "I need you to come to bed with me," Pepper said in Tony's ear, hugging him from behind. _

_ "I finish this and follow you," Tony said smiling. He was in his lab putting the finishing touches to the project. _

_ "You could finish other things," Pepper insisted with a hot whisper in his ear. _

_ Tony turned around, caressed Pepper's face and kissed her gently. "You really know how to convince me," he said, barely separating his lips from Pepper's. _

_ Pepper smiled, took Tony's hand and they both headed to their room. _

_ "Let me check she is asleep," Pepper said, pointing to the room next to theirs. _

_ "Who?" Tony asked. _

_ "The baby, who else is it going to be?" Pepper said smiling and looking at him surprised. _

_ "What baby? Whose?" Tony asked really baffled. _

_ Pepper softly laughed, "Our baby, Love." She opened the door of the room, and it was empty except for a crib in the middle. Tony watched as Pepper approached the cradle and he did the same. In the crib was a very beautiful sleeping baby. _

_ "That's our baby," Tony said looking at her and admired at such tenderness. _

_ "Why don't you remember it?" Pepper said sadly. _

_ "I want to..." Tony began to feel a hollow that took hold of him. "I want you to be here...I want you to be with me," he said with a lot of pain looking at Pepper and then at the baby. "I want this to be true...I want you to be real...I want you to be alive." _

Tony woke up. He had fallen asleep in his lab chair. It was dark outside, maybe it was time for dinner, he thought. The night before he had been unable to sleep. The fatigue seized him, and he did not know when he had fallen asleep in the chair. Tony felt more rested at least, apparently he had been able to sleep for a couple of hours even when a new nightmare woke him up. Lately, he did not dream of Pepper's disappearance, which was already quite cruel. But he dreamed of the life they could have had, and that even seemed to be worse. Time, had said Bruce, _ time_.

Tony kept staring at the project in front of him. Despite the nightmares, the recycling project had given him a purpose. Since he started working on it, the hours invested in that task freed his mind from stress. The ability to create gave him a freedom he could now recognize; it was very satisfying. He got up and decided to go to the kitchen to get something to eat. When he entered the kitchen, Rhodey was looking in the fridge.

"Nope, there's nothing. Honestly, I don't know if anyone cares about shopping for food. I know I don't," he said smiling at Tony.

"I'm starving," Tony said. "Chinese?"

"Count with me," Rhodey said nodding.

"Where is Cap?" Tony asked.

"I think he was going to one of those meetings today. You know, those support centers," Rhodey said.

"Oh sure, he said it early." Tony said nodding. That was Steve's way of feeling better. As always very noble of him, to help others, Tony thought. "Chinese is then."

"You owe me a foot massage," Natasha said entering the kitchen, behind her came Steve.

"OK, I accept my defeat," Steve told her smiling.

"Yep, you bet with Nat. It's betting on losing, pall," Rhodey said, looking at both of them.

"Yeah, I learned the hard way," Steve said heading to the fridge.

"There's nothing there, Cap. Do you sign up for Chinese?" Tony asked.

"Yes, please," Steve said smiling broadly.

"Me too and after eating I want my massage," Nat said going to the dining room.

"You already have dessert, man. Nat's feet," Rhodey said, slapping him on the shoulder.

Steve smiled, shaking his head defeated. 

Half an hour later, Bruce had also joined dinner and now the five of them were resting on the sofas watching TV. Sure enough, Steve was on one of the sofas with Natasha lying with his feet on Steve's legs while he was giving her the massage. Tony couldn't help remembering Pepper while he saw Steve and Nat. They both looked so relaxed, so sympathetic to each other. As if that closeness was something very familiar. Tony missed those moments with Pepper, the simplicity of those brief moments. A thought came to his mind about how he had always recognized them. He had always recognized when he had been happy with Pepper. When the moments were special and he knew he should remember them forever. Those ephemeral moments were rooted in his memory. They defined his existence, his happiness, which only grow with those share moments. Even when one day he could have them with someone else, it will never happen again with her. _ Never_. He got up from his seat.

Tony went to the kitchen. He had no idea where he should go, but he felt he wanted to run away from something.

"Are you okay?" Rhodey had followed him to the kitchen.

"Yes. No. I don't know," Tony said walking from side to side.

"Hey, it's fine. If you want, let's go outside for some air," Rhodey said softly.

"No, I don't want air. Fuck, what the fuck is wrong with me?" Tony put his hands on the kitchen counter to try to calm down. He lowered his head and felt how the breath was shortened.

"Hey, breathe, buddy. Just breathe," Rhodey told him very calmly approaching.

"I will never see her again" Tony said in a broken voice, "_Never_." He raised his face to see Rhodey who looked at him with concern and understanding. "I'll have to live my days without her, _ forever_." Suddenly, Tony realized he was crying. He hadn't cried after all those months. At times he wondered if something was wrong with him because he had not cried. He was unsure if that was not normal, if he should cry. Now the tears seemed like frightened prisoners escaping from jail. It threatened to leave him empty, and he could not stop.

Rhodey was hugging him and Tony responded very strongly, as if that hug could calm the immense grief he was feeling. The world was shattering again. The storm had not passed, he was barely in the eye of the hurricane. Tony felt weak and dragged Rhodey with him to the floor. He broke away from the hug and leaned on the kitchen shelf. His hands on his bent knees and his head down. Tears were still the protagonists of the moment and the pain seemed like an insatiable monster. Rhodey was stroking his shoulder without saying a word, and Tony painful sobs echoed on the kitchen walls.

_ _ _ _ _

A few minutes passed, and Tony and Rhodey were still in their same positions. However, Tony no longer cried. He was only with his gaze lost in space, very still.

"I don't talk to her," Tony said. "I could do it, but I don't. It would be like accepting she's not here."

"I talk to my father sometimes. And you can call me crazy, but sometimes I even hear him laugh at the jokes I tell him," Rhodey said with a warm smile.

Tony smiled, and he kept thinking how he would like to talk to her and hear her laugh too. 

"I'll go to my room," Tony said, and Rhodey got up from the floor and extended his hand to help him up. "Surprisingly I feel tired," he said thoughtfully.

"It's good, you better rest," Rhodey said softly, and Tony nodded and headed to his room.

_ _ _ _ _

The next morning Steve was at the lab door with two coffees in his hand. They had created a ritual every morning, in which Steve brought him coffee and they talked a little about everything. Tony used to tell him about the progress of the recycling project. They discussed the missions they had and many times they even talked of personal things.

"Good morning, Tony," Steve told him standing at the door.

"Morning, Cap," Tony said with a half smile. He could notice the worry on Steve's face. The way he got out terrified from the living room had been quite obvious to everyone.

"I need to go somewhere today, would you go with me?" Tony said before Steve asked how he was.

"Yes, of course," Steve replied a little surprised and giving him one of the coffees.

"Good, we can go now." Tony told him, having a sip of coffee and picking up some things from his desk.

"Sure," said Steve.

"Would you mind driving?" Tony asked.

"No, that's fine. I drive," Steve seemed to agree with everything Tony said even though he didn't understand what was happening.

Tony smiled, "Let's go."

_ _ _ _ _

Tony hadn't wanted to come before. Pepper's family had put a gravestone with her name. At first it had seemed absurd to him, but out of respect for Pepper's family, he had arranged for the grave to always have flowers. Tony did not remember being in a cemetery since the death of his parents and now he understood why he had not done so. They walked silently through the green grass until they found the space of the Potts family. There it was, the gravestone with her name. Tony felt Steve put his hand on his back and caressed him. When he turned to see him, his heart felt a little more courage by Steve's affectionate look. Tony nodded and Steve walked away.

"Hi, Pep," Tony said with a half smile.

Tony didn't know how long he was standing there, and he didn't think he looked crazy because he was talking alone. But he felt much better for having done it. _ You have to forgive her_, Bruce's words echoed in his head. A small step in trying to comprehend loss, he thought.She was gone, and he only had her memories left and now those talks. So exclusive and intimate, because they were only theirs.

_ _ _ _ _ 

On the way back to the compound, Tony was with his gaze lost through the car window thinking how incredible fast time had passed. Life seemed to always go on, everything else outside continued, did not stop. And despite that, he felt for a long time his world had become very small. An instant of pain that repeated every day and nothing changed. It felt like an immutable cage with superfluous bars. But from which with his helplessness, he hadn't had the strength to break them or just see them for what they really were. An illusion. Taking him out of his absorption, Tony felt how Steve took his hand and caressed it.

"You want lunch?" Steve told him while they were stopped waiting for the traffic light to change.

Tony looked at their hands together, and how he had inadvertently responded by squeezing Steve hand tightly. Then he looked at Steve and felt like he was not longer trapped. As if a very small flame was gaining strength so the light could enter and dissipate the mist.

"Whatever you want to eat," Tony said kindly.

Steve nodded, took his hand away to continue driving, and Tony wished they had stayed with their hands entwined along the road.

_ _ _ _ _

"Remind me, why am I supposed to go to that conference?" Steve complained while Natasha helped him with his tie.

"You are Captain America. You must be there to inspire patriotism," Natasha replied in a solemn tone.

"You don't even believe that, Nat," Steve said smiling.

"You look very handsome. That inspires anyone," Natasha said smiling. "And speaking of the devil."

Tony approached dressed in his black suit and bow tie. He wanted to hide he was out of breath when he saw Steve dressed in a suit. But Nat's mischievous look made him understand he hadn't.

"I'm ready. I'll wait for you in the car," Tony said, unable to look Steve in the eyes.

A couple of months later, they had been invited by the secretary of state to one of the conferences on peace treaties with other nations. The world seemed to start from scratch on everything. New treaties would be established and agreements signed. But not only to defend and protect countries, now it was about protecting the Earth. The Avengers had to be part of the conference and by unanimous vote (or not), the team decided Tony and Steve were the representatives chosen to go.

"I don't know how to behave in those places," Steve said. He and Tony were in a limousine that had been sent to take them to the conference venue.

"Calm down, it's easier than it seems," Tony assured him.

"How are you not nervous?" Steve asked.

"Why should I? You're the one who is going to give the speech," Tony said teasing.

"That vote was nothing fair, and you know it," Steve smiled.

"Easy, Cap. You only have to do a quick speech, and you are very good at those," Tony said nodding.

"I hope so," Steve said sighing.

They arrived at the conference venue and were received by Blaine. They were among several ambassadors and some representatives of the militia who greeted Steve with great enthusiasm and made him calm down a bit. They sat in a table next to the ambassadors of Wakanda. When it was time to give the speech, Captain America made his appearance, and Steve's words sounded with great fortitude and conviction. It had been a fair vote, Tony thought.

"You did great, Cap," Tony told Steve with a proud smile. Steve was coming back from finishing the speech and sat next to him.

"Thanks, Tony," Steve said blushing.

"Hi, Steve, Tony," a voice said behind Tony's back.

"Hi, how are you?" Steve asked Shannon.

"Very well, thanks. Congratulations, a great speech," Shannon said smiling.

"Thank you," Steve replied.

"Tony, how are you?" Shannon asked him.

"Never better," Tony spoke with a bit of rudeness without realizing it.

"I'm glad," Shannon replied. "Steve, I wanted to introduce you to some friends, if that's okay with you."

Tony didn't want to look at Steve, but sideways he saw how he hesitated a little, but accepted Shannon's invitation.

"Sure," Steve said and got up. But to Tony's surprise, Steve put his hand on Tony shoulder and approached behind him. He whispered in his ear in a very intimate movement, "I'll be back in a second."

Tony couldn't help closing his eyes when he felt Steve's breath so close to him. And of course, he didn't want to think why Steve had done it either. He also got up and went to the bar.

"Give me a Scotch," Tony told the bartender.

"Mister Stark," said someone behind him. When Tony turned around, he found a very attractive brunette in front of him.

"Nice to meet you, my name is Sarah," she said extending her hand. "You don't know me, but I was one of the engineers who worked on the recycling project in Manhattan that was funded by you. Well, at least I was before the..._ you know._"

"First of all, it's Tony. And secondly, I need to hear more about that," Tony said smiling and shaking her hand. 

_ _ _ _ _

Tony was entertained talking with Sarah about the recycling projects. What are the odds, he thought. The project she had started along with other colleagues was based on some ideas that Tony had also designed. An incredible coincidence he resumed one of those projects and was about to run it.

"It's really amazing you're working on one of the designs right now. If it doesn't bother you, I offer you my help," Sarah told him.

"You're welcome to come to the Avengers home," Tony said smiling.

"Do you all live together?" Sarah said smiling.

"Yes, and we fought over the TV remote too," Tony said joking. "Look, here comes one of my roommates," he said, pointing to Steve as he approached them. "Have you been introduced to the in-law?" Tony said teasing.

"Tony," Steve said warning. "Steve, nice to meet you," he said now addressing Sarah and shaking his hand.

"Nice to meet you, Captain. Very good speech. My name is Sarah," she said kindly.

"Thank you," Steve replied.

"Here Sarah was working on one of my recycling projects and has offered to help me with the design I'm running now. So you got competition," Tony said very pleased, as he looked Steve in the eyes and sipped his whiskey.

"Oh, does the captain also know engineering?" Sarah said surprised.

"No, no. I just take his coffee to the lab," Steve said smiling.

"I must return to my table, but I hope to hear from you," Sarah said with a look that spoke about something else rather than the recycling project.

"Sure," Tony repeated on purpose Steve's words. "What?" He said pretending to be surprised when he looked at him. Steve had a half smile on his lips, but his narrowed eyes told him he knew what Tony was doing.

"You tell me," Steve said approaching him.

Tony put the glass to his lips and drank the rest of his drink. "We must go to the table, now Wakanda ambassadors will have their speech. I don't want to miss it," Tony said very quickly and went to the table. He could hear Steve's soft laugh as he followed him.

_ _ _ _ _

The one who plays with fire...He did or said stupid things and then fled in terror, Tony thought. He was no paying attention to the speech of the Wakanda ambassadors and could only feel the touch of Steve's leg against his. The very stubborn man had brought his chair too close.

"You should breathe a little," Steve said with a smirk as he took a sip of his drink.

"Shut up, Rogers. I'm listening," Tony replied impatiently. He needed the evening to end and needed to leave there _ alone_.

_ _ _ _ _


	7. Chapter 7

A couple of hours later, the conference was over. They said goodbye to the ambassadors and went to the limo that would take them back home. They both sat down, and a strange silence accompanied them all the way to the compound. Tony didn't dare turn to see Steve, but he could feel the tension between them contained in the air he was breathing.

Tony was the first to get out of the car and headed for the door. He had only taken a few steps inside the entrance hall when felt Steve's hand take him by the arm to turn him around. It was not necessary, just feeling his touch Tony was already turning and rushing over Steve. Tony took him by the neck and was kissing him with all his might. It was a desperate kiss that Steve received with equal abandon as he took Tony by the waist to bring him closer to his body.

Tony devoured his lips, sucked them and used his tongue to savor Steve completely. When Tony heard him moan, reality became even more delicious than fantasy. Tony was kissing him hard, hungrily and without realizing it, he had taken Steve against a wall. When he finally separated himself a little to breath, Steve's look of desire overwhelmed him completely. Tony could not wish for more than those eyes to look at him forever. For that desperate breath to join his, so that only _ he _was the source of Steve air. Tony was kissing him passionately again, and he could feel the heat of their bodies burst with friction. Tony took Steve's hair to get him closer and felt how Steve grabbed him by his pants to bring him closer to his erection. Tony couldn't help moaning loudly.

Steve broke apart and changed their positions but not before taking both Tony's hands and putting them on top of his head, holding them only with one of his. With his other hand Steve stroked his face slowly while they looked intensely at each other out of breath. Tony felt his whole body surrendered to Steve, and although he didn't want to admit it, there was something else that also surrendered to him. Steve slowly approached and licked Tony's bottom lip with his tongue before taking it between his teeth and biting it softly. Tony closed his eyes and felt that sweet torture repeated with his upper lips. When he felt he could not take it anymore, Steve used his tongue again to gently suck his lips over and over. Tony could feel how Steve made that moment eternal, so he could get drunk with the sublime touches. Nevertheless, the kiss was slowly gaining strength again, and Tony felt as Steve lifted one of his legs to get closer. They could feel their erections in that position, and inside the kiss, the moans of both were lost when they felt the friction caused by their hip movements. Suddenly, an alarm began to sound. For just a second, they were so immersed in each other that they didn't seem to hear it, but then they stopped kissing and looked into bewildered eyes.

"Friday, what's going on?" Tony said and unquestionably felt the familiar emptiness that caused Steve's separation from his side.

"Sir, there is a fire in the center of the city, and it has taken several squares. The police ask for your help because firefighters cannot contain it and take all people out," the AI replied.

At that moment Bruce appeared next to them, "I will prepare the jet, the chief told me the fire has taken about 5 blocks," he said with concern.

"Where are Rhodey and Nat?" Steve asked.

"They're not here, but I already talked to them and they're on their way," Bruce replied.

Steve turned to see Tony who nodded, "Reminds me to set up another warning system instead of that damn alarm," he said heading to the door and flew off.

_ _ _ _ _

After helping to get the survivors out of the buildings and put out the fire. Tony saw Bruce talking to the chief firefighter, and Steve and Rhodey talking to the other firefighters. He knew he could not return to the compound.

"Rhodey?" Tony said.

"Hey, where are you?" Rhodey asked him.

"I need to go to the cabin, could you tell the rest that I won't go to the compound?" Tony answered.

"Tony, what happened? Why won't you come back?" Rhodey asked worriedly.

"Please, I need to be alone. I'll explain later, yes?" Tony told him defeated.

"Tony, I don't like this," Rhodey told him.

"Please," Tony insisted.

"OK, but at least text me when you get there," Rhodey told him unconvinced.

"I will, thanks, buddy," Tony replied.

_ _ _ _ _

Tony arrived at the cabin, texted Rhodey and went straight to take a cold shower. Later, he went to the kitchen and prepared something to eat even when he wasn't really hungry. _ Steve_. Until he finally ran away from the disaster, he had created. _ Love, I remember my first reactor, the "proof" that I have a heart. Well, it has been busy lately, creating conflicts that help him out of grief. _Tony liked talking to Pepper, it made him feel better. After looking that the sandwich he had prepared was still on the plate, he decided he was not hungry and went to his room to try to sleep.

_ _ _ _ _

The next morning, to his own surprise Tony had slept, at least a little. This time he was hungry, so he had for breakfast last night's sandwich and thought about going for a run in the woods in a little while. _ Steve _. It was not easy to get rid of the memory of what had happened the night before. But he was there not to think, he just wanted to be calm, alone for a while. Reading a book could do with it. Half an hour later, Tony decided to go running.

One summer day, but not so hot. You couldn't ask for more, he thought. Tony ran and ran with all his might, climbing some slopes that made everything more entertaining. While he was running, he realized he would have nothing to eat at noon, so he would need to go to the nearby town to buy some food. Another task to do, perfect, he said to himself. Taking advantage of the fact that he was already energized, he reached the town and bought some groceries. He had no idea how many days he was going to spend there, but bought enough just in case.

On the way back everything was very quiet, he met a group of hikers who did not seem to recognize him and who greeted him kindly. That place could not be more peaceful, he began to like it too much. When Tony arrived at the cabin, he took another shower and the fatigue gripped him, he had been around for 4 hours. Since he was not very skilled at cooking, he put a frozen meal he bought in the microwave and sat down to watch TV. After eating, the sofa was his best friend and went back to it.

_ _ _ _ _

_ Tony was standing by the lake shore. He was undecided whether to go swimming or not. Suddenly, Pepper was walking towards him, and he smiled when he saw her approach. _

_ "Are you going to swim?" Pepper asked with a smile. _

_ "Would you join me?" Tony asked. _

_ "Anthony Edward Stark are you afraid to go swimming?" Pepper asked playing with him. _

_ "Of course not," Tony laughed. _

_ "Then why don't you dive in?" Pepper asked raising an eyebrow. _

_ "I don't know. I think I shouldn't," Tony thoughtfully said looking at the lake. _

_ "You don't need me to swim in the lake. It's something you have to do alone," Pepper said in a sweet voice. _

_ Tony turned to see her, "I don't have to. Why go there if I can be here with you," he said worriedly. _

_ "Love, I'm there too, don't you see me?" Pepper told him with a sweet smile. _

Tony woke up. That was a very strange dream, he thought. He had fallen asleep again, he didn't know what that place had but he could rest there. He got up and went for a glass of water to the kitchen, through the window he saw it was beginning to be sunset. The images of the dream came back again. Pepper looked very beautiful in it, that smile made him feel a welcoming warmth in his heart. Waking up from such a dream, for the first time, left him a pleasant feeling. Tony decided to go for a walk around the lake.

_ _ _ _ _ 

“Tony,” Steve said standing at the door.

“I'm here, Cap,” said Tony with resignation.

Steve seemed to hear him and did not tell Tony to open. He just sat down on the floor next to the door as well. They stayed in silence for a few minutes.

“It is a beautiful night, but it's starting to get windy,” Steve said in a soft voice.

“Are you saying that to make me open the door to you?” Tony said smiling.

“Is it working?” Steve said hopefully.

Tony smiled but did not answer.

“I would like you open the door Tony, but not this one precisely,” Steve said.

“Are you trying to trick me with riddles?” Tony said trying to joke.

“I would like you open me the door to your life, and above all, to your present,” Steve said in a serious tone, and Tony knew the light conversation was over.

“We are friends now,” Tony said as if that solved everything between them.

“I know, and I am glad our friendship became stronger,” Steve said sighing. “But I want more,” he took a deep breath.

“It is a losing battle,” Tony said with remorse. “I am sorry for hurting you. You did not deserve those mean words, and my irresponsible behavior let us to this moment. Please, forgive me.”

“Tony, there is nothing to be forgiven,” Steve responded.

Other silent minutes passed, and Tony listened as Steve got up from the floor a took a few steps away. Tony got up too and grabbed the handle. This time, it was a little easier to open the door.

Steve turned around a looked at him. There was a contained pain in his words when he spoke. “There is a part of me that tells me I must go. I should leave you alone because one day you will find your own path. And it will lead you to me or maybe not, but that must be your decision.”

“It is not about time. I love her. She is everything and there is nothing left inside me,” Tony said with sadness.

“I am not asking you to stop loving her. It would not be fair,” Steve said, “You ask for forgiveness and here I am being selfish not letting you have your grief.” He turned around and looked at the night sky. “I want to fight your demons, Tony. I want the guilt, the remorse, the shame to be over so you can _ live, _even if it not with me.”

“It was you by my side that day when I was unconscious,” Tony said and Steve turned around again. “I felt empty when your caresses and your whispers went away.”

Steve looked at Tony, “_Let me in,_” he said softly.

“What did you say to me that day?” Tony asked him.

Steve began to get closer very slowly, and Tony did not move, he was lost in his gaze. Before long, Steve was in front of him.

“_I love you…I wish I could make you happy… Rest, Love, _” Steve whispered those words and Tony closed his eyes while hearing them.

When Tony opened his eyes, Steve was so close to him that he could feel his breath. They stared at each other waiting.

“Don't go,” Tony said in a whisper, and Steve was kissing him.

Time stopped at the moment their lips touched again. Steve was kissing him and Tony succumbed to desire with those lips that slowly tortured him. With one hand in his neck, Steve softly caressed him while also stealing his breath every second he pulled his lips away to kiss him softly one more time. Tony accepted the surrender completely. He needed Steve, _wanted_ _him_ by his side. Even when it was inexplicable, he felt complete. Tony took him by the waist to bring him closer and when Steve stopped for a moment to see him in the eyes. Tony felt a chill run through his entire body. _I love you_. Why could he see it in his eyes? Tony wondered, but most strange of all, _how_ could he feel it in his heart.

"We should go inside," Tony said smiling. They were still standing at the door.

"Sure," Steve said smiling.

"Are you hungry?" Tony asked as he closed the door.

"I am," Steve said and was kissing Tony hard again when he turned around.

Steve hit him against the door and kissed him as if he really wanted to eat him whole. Tony groaned with every move of Steve's tongue, and with every touch of his hands that possessed every part of his body. Tony responded with the same fiery intensity to the kiss. He needed to make Steve feel that he wanted him the same way, and that he was also melting at that untamed passion. They kissed once and again, and each touch of their lips sealed a story that was meant to be. Tony thought he could not do anything else than kiss him eternally. Then he felt how Steve touched the bulge of his erection, and he had to stop kissing him for a moment to groan and breathe at the same time. Steve took the opportunity to kiss his neck; he savored it with each kiss as if he wanted to taste every inch of his skin. In an instant, Steve was taking Tony's shirt off and then his own, kissing him again. Tony stroked that back exploring each muscle as he had once done in his fantasies. Again reality was a bliss, that heat, that skin felt so good in his hands. Steve resumed the task of exploring his body, he began to kiss his neck again and without Tony noticing, Steve put his hand inside his pants.

"Steve," Tony said, begging him, he didn't know for sure if he asked him to stop or continue.

Steve took it as a "continue" because while he kept kissing him, he wrapped his fingers around Tony’s cock, stroking carefully. Tony's moan was quite loud, and Steve's reaction was to slowly continue down kissing him all over his chest until he knelt in front of Tony.

"Steve," Tony didn't know what to say, although something told him he had to say something. He only saw how Steve lowered his pants and with one hand stroked his cock again. Tony didn't want to close his eyes before that image, but with only Steve's breath approaching his cock he was lost. Steve took a long lick along one side first, tasting his arousal with his tongue. Tony had to hold on to the door handle to keep from falling. His whole body felt weak. Steve slid his left arm over Tony's hip to help him. But he continued with his task, now trailing down with his tongue to lick on precume from Tony's cock. 

“Steve,” Tony was sure he was begging now. 

Steve stopped to see him, and without taking his intense gaze from him, he began to sink his mouth over the head of Tony's cock and sucked it gently.

“Fuck,” Tony cried out, tossing his head back against the door. 

Steve's mouth dropped lower, opening his jaw to take Tony’s cock completely. He began to move his tongue with each suck, and Tony gasped while hips made an effort to thrust up. For a moment, Tony thought it was too much. But when he heard Steve's pleasurable groan when he moved his hips, he felt he almost reached orgasm with just that sound. Steve pulled off for a second and then sink over Tony's entire cock and back off. He continued sucking and getting faster within the minutes. Tony's whole body was shaking, and his hips had lost all restraint, but Steve's moans encouraged him and in an instant he was giving in to the heady pleasure of orgasm. Steve sucked on every hip movement until Tony cock twitched on his tongue as he came. He kept sucking and tasting, savoring Tony with his tongue.

Tony was trying to catch his breath when he opened his eyes and saw Steve in front of him again looking at him tenderly. As if the image of a Tony having just reached orgasm was the sweetest thing he had ever seen.

"Steve," Tony couldn't say another word other than his name.

"Is that a lucky charm now?" Steve whispered in his ear as he hid his face in his neck.

Tony laughed pleased, _ touché _, he thought. "Let's go to the room," he said and took Steve's hand to take him to the room. When they entered Tony's room, he put himself in front of Steve and began to open Steve's jeans. Steve took a deep breath when Tony lowered his jeans and got on his knees to remove them altogether with his shoes. Tony admired and his mouth watered before Steve's cock curved up towards his stomach. But he wanted to do something else for Steve, "I need you to lie in bed," he said.

Steve went to bed and lay down while watching Tony's movements. He also removed all his clothes and went to his bedside table where he found a lubricant. Tony went to the bed and sat on his knees between Steve's legs. Once again saw Steve's cock and this time he did not resist giving it a gentle stroke. Steve closed his eyes and squeezed the sheet tight with his hands. Tony wanted to please him.

"Come here," Tony told him and Steve sat down. Tony took Steve's hand and filled it with lubricant taking it to his entrance. "Can you help me?" Tony whispered as he approached to kiss him. A moan immediately escaped from his mouth when he felt Steve put a finger carefully inside him. 

"I need more than that, Cap," Tony said looking into his eyes and could see in Steve's eyes the hunger mixed with sweet contentment.

"Tony," Steve told him in a sigh.

"I'm yours, Steve," Tony told him, and Steve added a second finger making him gasp and shiver while he tightened his grip on Steve's hair.

The rhythm was slow, as if Steve had all the time in the world and didn't care that his cock must ache with the tortuous wait. Tony rocked his hips back to take Steve’s fingers deeper and when he heard Steve's moan, he looked into his eyes, "I need you inside me," Tony said, taking Steve's cock and slowly putting it in his entrance. He was not yet ready enough, but it didn't matter, he needed Steve inside him. Slowly, Tony slid down until he had all Steve’s cock inside him. Steve exhaled a long, tremoring breath while groaning loudly, but didn't move waiting for Tony to adjust.

In a few seconds Tony felt relaxed and moved his hips a little giving Steve permission to continue. Steve pushed into him at a lazy pace first, fearful of harming Tony. Like that was a promise of pleasure for which there was no need to despair. They kissed again, and Tony rolled and pushed back. His intense moan of pleasure that echoed on the room, born from the burning sensations of having Steve inside him and his stroke to his newly awaken cock. But Tony wanted to please him, and Steve seemed only to think about how to please him. Tony kissed Steve and suddenly pulled away from him to lie on the bed with his legs open.

Steve looked at his entire body with a primitive desire while breathing short of breath. He took the lube again, covered his cock and turned to Tony pushing inside him as far as he could in a single motion. Tony groaned again throwing his head back at the intensity of feeling so complete. Steve pulled out a bit only to press deeply back in, and both of them were lost to the delectable sensations. With each thrust Tony’s body welcomed him, and Steve dropped his hand to his cock, grasping the achingly hard length and stroking in time with his thrusts. Tony could feel his orgasm building as Steve’s thrusts grew quicker, then he wrapped his arms around Steve’s neck to bring him for a kiss.

"Come for me, Steve," Tony told him with a hot breath in his ear. It didn’t take much more for Steve to cum. His erratic thrusts pushed him over the edge releasing an explosion inside of Tony. One thrust hit that blissful spot that sent Tony to paradise, and that was all it took for him too.

Steve collapsed against Tony who wrapped his arms around him and pulled him closer. After a moment, Steve slipped out of Tony’s body and rolled to the side bringing him close to him. They were hugging each other trying to catch their breaths. 

Tony could feel the sleepiness invading him. He closed his eyes telling himself it would only be for a moment. He felt a caress on his face and heard a whisper. _I love you._

"Steve," Tony heard himself say as he was possessed by a pleasant dream.

_ _ _ _ _


	8. Chapter 8

Tony woke up again from a pleasant dream. He seemed to be having a better streak lately, he thought. Steve was not with him in bed, and Tony took the pillow in which Steve had slept and deeply breathed his essence while closing his eyes. _ I love you _. Where would he be?, Tony wondered. He got up and went to the bath. As the water ran through his body under the shower, the images and sensations of the previous night repeated in mind, and his body began to respond. Steve would be his downfall, Tony thought smiling. He knew he had awakened to a new day in which the mist seemed to have disappeared, and he could only feel a very sweet elation.

Even when was early in the morning the day felt hotter, Tony thought as he put on a silk robe. When he went downstairs, his nostrils were wrapped in the delicious aroma of fresh coffee in the morning. Upon arriving into the kitchen, the image of Steve in a white boxer and undershirt was all he needed to start the day. Steve was leaning on the counter holding a cup of coffee in his hand while watching something on his cellphone. Tony stood in front of him on the opposite counter.

"Good morning," Tony said with a smile of extreme satisfaction at the image before him.

"Good morning, Tony," Steve replied smiling as well. "Coffee?" he asked.

"Please," Tony replied. Steve turned around to pour his coffee, and Tony couldn't help tilting his head while looking at his body like a predator whose prey was too close; he bit his lower lip. When Steve turned to give him the coffee, he tried to hide his expression. Focusing on the coffee cup and taking a sip, but he could hear Steve's soft laugh.

"You could stay, if you want," Tony said as he drank his coffee without looking Steve in the eye.

"I'd love to," Steve said pleased. He went back leaning on the counter putting his hands each side like inviting Tony to look.

Tony ran his gaze on his entire body until he looked into his eyes, and couldn't help feeling lost at Steve's penetrating gaze. Steve had a way of expressing everything with his eyes, or it was perhaps that Tony knew how to read them, he didn't know. "Good, yesterday I bought some frozen food, I really didn't know how long I would be here," Tony told him trying not to think of just throwing himself over Steve.

"Yeah, I saw," Steve said, "But if you want, we can buy something. I can cook," Steve said with a smile.

"Oh right, captain and chef. Among your professions, I know," Tony said, teasing him.

Steve laughed. "The town is not far away, isn't it?" he asked. "I thought it would be nice to take a walk, although the day looks like it's going to be pretty hot today."

"Yes, we could go now and maybe have breakfast," Tony told him.

Steve stared at Tony and approached him without looking away until he was close. He took the cup from his hand, put it on the counter, and went straight to the belt of Tony's robe to open it. He approached Tony's ear, "Can I have my breakfast?," he said in a hoarse voice. Tony didn't know when he had stopped breathing, but after hearing him, he let out a breath that almost ended in a groan. Steve placed his palms on Tony's bare skin, his fingers running up and down, and began kissing his neck. "Can I?" he said once more.

"Yes," Tony replied with a short breath, and Steve was kissing him. Tony had to recognize Steve was making him lose his mind every time he was so close. His mind which some had said was of a genius. Seemed to be blunted, crushed, in a short circuit. His thoughts, words, and any left reasoning he could have. Seemed to get lost so he could only _ feel _Steve. And how good those full lips, that reddened with his touch felt. Tony kissed him and he was sure that when sucking those lips he could taste the ambrosia of the Gods. He placed his hands on Steve's neck and hair to bring him closer deepening the kiss. If pleasure could be defined with a sound, it was Steve's moans of intense delight, the melody. If desire could be defined with an action, it was the gentle movements of Steve's tongue, the perfect dance. When Steve broke away from the kiss, Tony was left gasping for breath. 

Steve slowly went down kissing his neck, licking him, savoring his skin again. Then his lips started kissing his chest taking each nipple inside his mouth to suck it gently, and Tony gasped. He was exploring Tony's body with his hands, lips and tongue, stroking it, caressing it, until he was on his knees in front of him. Tony's cock was so hard already it was a relief when Steve tugged down his boxers and let his erection spring free. Steve gave a firm stroke to his cock and the simple touch made Tony moaned loudly. Then Steve took his cock right into his mouth and Tony grabbed the edge of the counter with his hands. At least this time he had something to lean on. Because Steve mouth was to much hot and wet, and his tongue was very clever. As if it had learned the lesson from the previous day and knew how to repeat every movement that made Tony groans. He didn't think he would ever quite get used to. He was melting against Steve’s ministrations.

Tony moans of pleasure were growing in their intensity as his cock was stroked, pulled, and squeezed in the warm embrace of Steve mouth and hand. For an instant, Steve pulled back and looked up at him with a lust gaze to very slowly return to take him all. The second his mouth sucked him again, Tony ground out as the last shreds of his self control receded and he was coming. Steve swallowed every last bit and even licked him clean before pulling off. Then he got up and hugged Tony who collapsed on top of him panting.

"How can you do this to me?" Tony said smiling with his head in Steve's neck. He could feel Steve's chest move with a silent laughter.

"We can go to breakfast now," Steve said softly in his ear.

Tony got up to look him in the eye, "I need to return the favor, it wouldn't be fair," he said, raising an eyebrow and putting his hand on the bulge in Steve's boxer.

Steve closed his eyes and sighed deeply, "Tony," he said softly.

Tony rushed to kiss him and Steve received him moaning as Tony was stroking his cock over the fabric. A few second later, Tony reached into the boxer and Steve groaned intensely.

"Do you want my mouth?" Tony said as he gave a hard stroke to his cock.

"God," Steve said leaning his forehead on Tony's.

"Tell me what you want, Steve?" Tony said in a hot whisper.

"Tony, please," said Steve out of breath.

"How do you want it, Steve?" Tony asked him once again, slowing the pace of his strokes.

"Please, I want your mouth," Steve said and he was shaking, his body trembling with anticipation.

Tony kissed him hard for a moment and changed his positions until he knelt in front of Steve. First he licked his bulge with his tongue over the fabric looking at Steve who had trouble breathing. He immediately lowered his boxer and took Steve's beautiful cock, sucked his head, and Steve's moan encouraged him to sink his lips further. He sucked him insatiably, and Tony was pleased to finally have Steve's cock in his mouth. It was a pleasure to hear Steve groan at the enthusiastic movements of his tongue that savored him intensely. Within the minutes, Steve breath was getting heavier and quicker. Tony hummed so the vibrations ran up Steve's cock while tasting with his fingers at the skin just behind his balls. Steve arched his back and groaned a hoarse, “_Tony. _” With that, Tony hummed again and then pressed firmly on Steve’s perineum, who arched his back again with a very loud moan.

“Tony," Steve seemed to warn him, but Tony did not stop. He just let out a quietly affirmative grunt before Steve came down his throat. Tony took it all, pulling off when he was finished licking Steve's still half-hard cock.

"Now we are even," Tony said when he got up. 

Steve was kissing him again, so the time for breakfast seemed far away now. Tony continued to get drunk on the sweet ambrosia of Steve's lips, and the desire to please each other seemed to be their only focus at that moment.

_ _ _ _ _ 

After both found a way to stop pleasuring each other, a while later they were walking towards the town. Their bodies could not be far apart from the other, so they were walking very close. Luckily, they decided to leave early because the sun began to rise and it could be felt the temperature rising. Although the proximity of both when walking could say otherwise.

"This place is wonderful," Tony told him admiring the landscape.

"Yes it is, it's very peaceful," Steve said pleased.

"Yesterday, I was thinking I could live here," Tony said sighing.

"It wouldn't be bad, but I see you installing a lab at some point," Steve joked.

Tony laughed, "You know, I thought about it too," he said. "Well, at least some days of vacations could do. Have you ever gone on vacation?" Tony asked curiously.

Steve kept thinking, "No, the truth is I haven't," he replied thoughtfully. "I think I've been in new places to me, cities, countries, but for missions, always for work."

"Mini vacations then?" Tony said smiling.

Steve laughed, "OK."

They arrived to center of the town and headed to a cafeteria for breakfast. It was like a morning in the lab, but this time with a better view. As always, they talked a little about everything. Tony was surprised at how comfortable he felt with Steve, and he could tell Steve felt the same. Like being together was so natural that there was no reason to feel any awkwardness. As if everything had been meant to be so.

When they finished breakfast, they took a walk through the streets. It was a fairly small town and perhaps as it was Saturday, there were not many people on the street. Walking through one of the streets they noticed an old chapel that looked out on a hill, and they went there. The town was surrounded by flowers and green pastures everywhere, it was really wonderful. When they reached the chapel, they saw it was open and Steve told Tony to enter. There was a lady lighting some candles and a couple sitting in silence. Steve went immediately to see the paintings on the walls. He walked around fascinated seeing the paintings, while Tony was seeing _him_ with the same fascination.

"You like to draw," Tony told him.

"I love it yes, but I have a long time without doing it," he said wistfully.

"I understand," Tony said with a half smile.

"The paintings in the churches are very meaningful, it seems incredible to me how feelings can be expressed, captured in them. Devotion, love, pain, loss..." Steve told him while looking at a painting thoughtfully.

Tony saw the painting and comprehended what Steve meant to say. His heart tightened in his chest of admiration for that extraordinary man. He took a look at Steve who continued captivated with the painting and went to walk. While passing by one aisle, his mind started to wander. He knew the rage had made him say unpleasant words to Steve, buy they only reflected the fear of facing a reality he could now recognize. Impossible to deny his attraction for Steve, but there was an inexplicable connection that made him want to always be by his side. Even when he was with Pepper, he had always felt it. During the 2 years Steve was away, he carried in his pockets the cellphone he gave him. Now he could also recognize it was a way to keep Steve near him, always present. His distance had always made him feel that strange emptiness, and now, he could feel complete.

"Beautiful," Steve was at his side looking at the painting in front of Tony.

Tony turned to see him, "Is it a sacrilege if I try to kiss you inside the chapel?" He said looking at his lips.

Steve laughed so loudly that the candle lady turned to look at him with a scolding look. He took Tony's hand and pulled him out of there, taking him to one side of the chapel to kiss him. They kissed as if it was the first time they did, with hunger, with passion. Deliberately surrendering their breaths to the other until they felt the lack of air.

"I think the surroundings of the chapel count as sacred equally," Tony said smiling.

Steve laughed and Tony kissed him again. He loved the sound of his laughter, Tony thought. 

_ _ _ _ _ 

Shortly after, they went down again to the town. Inside the store, Steve took care of buying "_real food _," he had said jokingly to Tony. They bought bags that kept the cold because the midday heat was already giving everything of itself. Lacking little to get to the cabin, both were heated and sweating. Steve looked at the lake and his face lit up completely.

"I need to take a swim just for a moment," Steve said excitedly, nodding at the lake.

Tony smiled and nodded. Both went to the lake and placed the bags on the shore. Steve saw that there was no one around, undressed completely and went into the water immediately. Tony stared at him for a moment remembering his dream, _ Then why don't you dive in? _He remembered Pepper's words. In the dream, he was afraid and felt insecure. In reality, he could see himself walking towards the lake, _ diving in_, to where Steve was. Why had she said she was there too? Tony wondered.

"Hey, don't you come? The food can't stand that much with this heat," Steve said smiling.

Steve's words took him out of his reverie, and Tony took off his clothes and went into the lake. The water was very refreshing, not too cold or too hot, perfect for cooling. Tony took some dives and then approached Steve who was with a big smile from ear to ear. Steve looked genuinely happy, and Tony couldn't help smiling with the same satisfaction. He moved a little closer and Steve was already wrapping him with his arms. They kissed, and Tony wrapped his legs around Steve. This time the kisses were slow, brief, intimate. Kisses in which their lips delighted in the presence of the other. When they stopped kissing, Tony caressed his face and with his thumb gently stroked those reddened lips. Steve closed his eyes for a moment, and Tony could understand the intensity of what Steve was feeling. He could feel it too. He didn't know how they got to that moment, but he knew he should be there with Steve.

"I'm glad you're here," Tony told him when Steve opened his eyes. He didn't understand why he felt the need to say it, but his heart seemed to be overwhelmed with a sensation he couldn't describe.

Steve leaned his forehead against his and sighed deeply, "Me too," he said softly.

_ _ _ _ _

In the kitchen, Steve tried to cook while he was interrupted with Tony's kisses. He had told Steve he would help, but Tony was really doing nothing but stealing kisses at every moment.

"It smells like burned," Tony said breathlessly. He had attacked Steve with a new kiss.

"Jesus, Tony!" Steve said worried, approaching the kitchen to remove the food and lower the fire. "OK, I can't cook with you here. You distract me and we will end up eating smoked," he said smiling when he turned to see him.

Tony tried to put an offended face, but the mischief in his face didn't let him, "You're throwing me out of my own kitchen," he said, approaching Steve again, "I thought I was helping you," he said innocently, placing his lips very close to Steve's.

"No, you don't," Steve said in a hot whisper.

Tony was kissing him again and this time he stroked the bulge in Steve's pants making him groan, "OK, I'm going to watch TV," he said, breaking away suddenly, leaving Steve panting.

A few minutes later Steve had finished cooking and headed to the living room to find Tony.

"The food is ready, now we can...Tony?" Steve asked when he saw Tony wasn't sitting in the living room even though the TV was on.

"Tony?" Steve said knocking on the bedroom door.

"You can come in," Tony said.

"The food..." Steve said but could not finish speaking when he saw Tony naked lying on his bed.

Tony smiled pleased at Steve's surprise and hungry eyes. "Once you asked me if I was sure I wouldn't make you wait so long to give you something you want," Tony said getting up of bed approaching Steve. When he was in front of him, he began to put his hands under his shirt caressing him and lifting the shirt until he took it off. Steve saw him with his those piercing eyes that owned his soul, but also made his body catch fire. "That time we were interrupted," Tony said opening Steve's jeans button and lowering the lock. Steve began to breathe through his mouth with every movement of Tony. He reached down to lower Steve's jeans and boxer all at once. When he rose slowly stroking Steve's muscular legs. He could hear his moan of pleasure when one of his hands passed lightly stroking his half-hard cock. Tony was in front of him, his lips very close to Steve's. "They didn't let me answer you," he said stroking Steve's chest with his hands. "I'm sure," Tony said huskily. "I'm sure on give you everything you want, Steve." Tony was kissing him and felt how Steve hugged him to get him closer. 

He was dipping his tongue into Steve's mouth. One of his hands was cupping Steve's neck when he felt Steve lifted one of his legs so their erections brush. Both groaned at the same time, as if wishing the same. Steve took Tony's other leg and lifted him with incredible ease until he took him to bed. There both continued kissing and began to move their hips to feel even more pleasure with the luscious friction. Tony took Steve's ass to squeeze it and bring him closer to him. Both were moaning as they followed a rhythm that delighted them. Suddenly, Steve rose in one hand to take Tony's cock and give him a stroke, making him cry with rapture. Then he gathered their cocks to stroke them together and both were lost to the pleasure. The precume of both served so Steve's hand could slide around their cocks. Long, slow thrusts sped up, slapping skin against skin. Tony felt helpless under Steve touch. Gasps turned into groans demanding release. The heat between them built higher and higher until both came.

_ _ _ _ _

A few minutes later, they were hugging looking at each other. Tony could feel Steve's soft caresses on his back, while he caressed his face.

"Was this what you had in mind that day?" Tony asked mischievously.

"I have a list," Steve joked and Tony laughed.

"Steve Rogers, Captain America, _ who should inspire patriotism_. Who was going to believe it?" Tony said smiling, "I'll have to take care of it in detail," he said raising an eyebrow with a smirk.

"I heard you that day," Steve said looking at him while licking his lower lip.

"I think I expected you to do it," Tony said without surprise, staring at him. "Did you touch yourself thinking of me?" Tony asked.

"Yes," Steve replied in a sigh, blushing even more.

"You used to touch yourself thinking of me?" Tony asked with a hoarse voice. It had only been a few minutes, but he could already feel his cock twitch in anticipation.

"Yes," Steve replied breathlessly.

_ _ _ _ _


	9. Chapter 9

«Hi, Rhodey,» Tony said very enthusiastically.

«Finally, you answer a call. I was starting to get worried with those very short messages,» Rhodey said annoyed.

«Everything is fine, I promise,» Tony said gladly.

«Are you drunk or something? You sound too happy,» Rhodey asked him in disbelief.

Tony laughed, «I'm fine, really. And no, I'm not drunk,» Tony replied to him and heard the soft laughter of Steve. «How is everything there?» he asked Rhodey.

They were on the porch watching the sunset over the lake. Steve was sitting in one of the chairs with a beer in his hand looking now at Tony, while he was stood leaning on one of the wooden columns.

«Well, under control. Is Steve there with you, right?» Rhodey asked him.

«Yes, he is,» Tony answered him staring at Steve.

«Did you fight? That is this all about?» Rhodey asked him concerned.

«We already made peace,» Tony told him biting his lips while staring at Steve.

Steve put the beer on the table near him and stood up approaching Tony. He was in front of him very close.

«Are you two going to ever stop bothering each other?» Rhodey asked him snorting.

«We are good now. We came to an agreement,» Tony said lifting his face to look into Steve's eyes.

Steve raised an eyebrow with a smirk on his lips.

«Did you?» Rhodey asked amazed.

«Yeah, we are going to be good to each other. Make love, not war,» Tony said jokingly to Rhodey but with his eyes fixed in Steve's lips.

Steve smiled and bent down to kiss his neck. Tony closed his eyes trying not to make a sound into Rhodey's conversation.

Rhodey laughed knowingly, «Enjoy _ that _, but I give you both one week and you will be bickering again,» he said teasing him.

Tony laughed too, «I think you already know I'm fine. We are getting back tomorrow, see you buddy,» he finished saying hurried up.

«See you tomorrow, Tony,» Rhodey responded laughing softly.

Tony took Steve's face and was kissing him. But then Steve broke apart looking at him with a smirk.

«So, we have an agreement?» Steve said in a low voice.

«We do. I made you signed it last night while you were asleep,» Tony said closing the distance again and sucking Steve's lower lips.

«What did I sign?» Steve asked. 

«Basically, we're going to fuck after every fight we have,» Tony said in a hoarse voice kissing him.

Steve moaned to the hungry movements of Tony's tongue. He was born to kiss him, Tony thought.

«Make up sex then. It sounds like a good deal to me,» Steve said out of breath.

«I thought you were too old fashioned to know the term,» Tony said teasing.

«Are you trying to pick up a fight?» Steve said laughing softly.

«Maybe, is it working?» Tony asked with a mischievous smile. 

Steve was kissing him again, and Tony broke apart to continue teasing him, «No really. How old are you now? 110? 120?» Tony asked him grinning.

«Shut up,» Steve said kissing Tony's reply away and Tony only moaned in agreement.

_ _ _ _ _

Next day they woke up early to return to the compound. Nevertheless, it was very difficult for them to try to leave the house. They decided to take a bath together, and that took longer than it should. They decided to dress together, and _ that _ was also a bad idea. When they realized it, a good part of the morning had passed until they managed to get into the car and return. In the early afternoon, they were back at the compound.

"Hi, you two," Bruce said smiling as he saw Steve and Tony got out of the car at the compound's gate.

"Hi Bruce," Steve replied smiling too.

"Banner, where are you going?" Tony asked him. 

“I need to go to the city. All good?” He asked looking at Tony worried.

"All good, buddy. All good," Tony replied grinning and looking at Steve who blushed a little and smiled back.

Bruce looked at Steve, "Good job, Steve," he said jokingly and Steve blushed even more.

Bruce said goodbye to them and Tony and Steve entered the compound. At the hall, they realized they would have to break apart for the first time after those days when they did nothing but be on top of each other. They stopped for a moment looking at the other and already understanding, with the look of their eyes, that both thought the same.

"I'll go to the lab," said Tony.

"I'll go with Nat to catch up," Steve replied, nodding.

"See you in a little while," Tony told him.

"Sure," Steve said staring at him.

"Don't miss me," Tony said teasing him.

"I will," Steve replied smiling. Tony smiled back and turned around.

Tony couldn't believe how silly he felt about having to distance from Steve. Lost, he was completely lost, he thought with a smile on his face while going to the lab.

_ _ _ _ _ 

Tony entered his lab, and a thought took him by surprise, he liked coming home. This time, the word hadn't sounded so far away, it was his _ home_. Then, another thought also came to him. He had to finish running the recycling project because he also had that other thing in mind. Only a few details were missing, so he thought about the girl at the conference he went with Steve. It would be great if she took care of the implementation, especially if she had experience and so he didn't have to take care of the initiation protocol.

"Friday, dear, I need to contact that girl of the conference day. Locate her and let me know," Tony said as he watched one of the screens.

"Of course, sir. And welcome to your lab," Friday replied.

"Thanks, dear," Tony replied to the AI.

At that moment Rhodey entered through the door.

"But if it's Tony Stark himself," Rhodey said jokingly. He approached Tony and gave him a hug, "From that silly smile on your face I see that everything is fine," he said, rolling his eyes.

"Hi, buddy, you missed me too much," Tony said smiling.

"The truth is that I did,” Rhodey said smiling, “So, you made peace with Steve," he told him, gesturing the quote on the word peace with his fingers.

Tony laughed, "Yes, we won't fight again and if we do, we have a quite satisfactory way of fixing things. Which leaves me thinking that those fights will come in handy," Tony replied, nodding.

Rhodey started laughing too, "Well, it was that or that one day you two would kill each other," he said explaining, "Preferably the first."

"Sir, Sarah Mckhan is on the phone, do you want me to communicate with her?" Friday asked.

"Yes, please," Tony replied.

"Hi, Mr. Stark," Sarah said on the phone.

"Hey, I already feel old, call me Tony. Tell me you're not busy to help me with my project," Tony said as he watched one of his screens.

Sarah laughed softly, "Well, I just received some assignments yesterday, but I think I could take some time out," she said hesitating a little.

"I hear that as a yes. How about a meeting tomorrow here in my lab?" Tony asked.

"Wow that's pretty fast, but I will be there," Sarah replied firmly.

"Well perfect, tomorrow 9 am. Someone will pick you up, don't worry about the rest," Tony told her focusing on one task on the screen.

"Perfect, thanks for counting on me. I look forward to our meeting tomorrow," Sarah replied.

"OK, see you then," Tony said half absent and concentrated on the screen.

"Bye, Tony," Sarah said.

"OK, I see you losing the first fight, clearly," Rhodey said shaking his head.

"What?" Tony asked, turning around.

"Nothing, buddy," Rhodey replied with a half smile, and Tony seemed not to have heard him. "We all had dinner together, what do you think?" Rhodey asked him.

"Yep," Tony replied focusing again on the screen.

_ _ _ _ _

The hours flew by and Tony hadn't noticed. He had been so focused that he lost track of time until the roar of his stomach told him he was hungry. He decided to go to his room, took a shower and then went down to see what they would eat. While he was in the elevator, Tony realized he only had lunched with Steve, and now he also needed to see where he was. Apparently, he was hungry for those full lips too. When the elevator opened, Tony met Bruce in the hallway.

"Hey, you know, I need your help with something," Bruce told Tony when he saw him.

"Whatever you need, buddy," Tony said with a nod. Sometimes it felt odd to hear Banner on Hulk's body. But Tony knew Bruce was very happy with what they had accomplished.

"Thank you. I'll tell you later," Bruce smiled, "I think Nat ordered something to eat."

When they entered the dining room, Natasha and Rhodey were standing around the table talking pleasantly. Steve wasn't there; it was the first thing Tony noticed.

"Welcome back," Natasha said with a smile.

"Romanoff," Tony said smiling too.

"In 15 minutes we will have Thai food, so I propose a toast to our friend's return home," Rhodey said, going to the kitchen for some beers.

"I left 2 days, any excuse is good to celebrate," Tony said smiling.

"A little honeymoon, we know that," said Natasha teasing him, and Bruce's soft laugh was heard as he watched his phone attentively.

"I knew you would be the worst of all," Tony said, smiling and shaking his head.

"This is just the beginning," Natasha said raising an eyebrow.

"OK, here you have," Rhodey said, handing each one a beer. "Is it getting hotter or is it just me?" Rhodey asked them.

"Now it will get hotter," Natasha said, drinking from her beer as she watched Steve enter the dining room.

Tony rolled his eyes, but then he couldn't help but run out of breath when he looked at Steve. He must have been in the gym, and now was all clean, fresh, _ perfect_, Tony thought. Steve immediately smiled pleased to see him and Tony's heart skipped a beat as if he had years without seeing him. Steve approached Tony, took the beer he had in his hand to drink a little.

"What are we going to eat?" he asked Natasha.

"He, _ you _. The rest Thai," Nat replied and Bruce this time laughed without hiding.

"Fuck you all," Tony said smiling and taking the beer again from Steve's hand. Those eyes looked at him with adoration and if it wasn't because he was playing strong, Tony really wanted to eat Steve whole at that instant. A few seconds later, Tony thanked God because the doorbell rang with the delivery guy. At least, there was something to focus on now that wasn't Steve's lips. Rhodey went for the food.

"Entertained in the lab?" Steve asked Tony smiling.

"I was," Tony responded by looking at him intensely, and Steve licked his lower lip. He needed to focus at dinner, Tony thought.

Rhodey arrived with the food and everyone sat at the table. Steve sat next to Tony and he wished he hadn't done it. Every brush of his skin, aroused too close memories and distracted him from focusing on eating. However, after a few minutes of hard concentration, Tony was able to focus on eating calmly. They talked, kept joking with Steve and Tony and remembered some moments of the past as it always used to happen when they were together. When they finished eating, they decided to watch some TV.

At the living room, Steve sat down and pointed out to Tony to sit next to him on the sofa. Not even for a second did Tony stop to think about the jokes that would follow that, and sat next to him. Natasha sat next to Tony and winked at him. Tony couldn't understand how everyone was so little surprised at this new situation. As if it was something they already knew, before Tony, it was going to happen. Well, Tony knew Natasha was the first to know, but he was surprised Rhodey and Bruce also knew they could end up together. Apparently, they knew him quite well. Some teasing friends, but friends, Tony smiled. Suddenly, Tony noticed how Steve took him by the hand intertwining their fingers and caressed him while watching TV. Tony turned to see him and Steve smiled at him affectionately. Tony responded to his touch and turned to continue watching TV thinking about how strange life could be. Today he was there feeling loved, not only by an extraordinary man he admired intensely, but also by his friends. Life had turned too big in such a short time. And even though, thinking about Pepper, it seemed unfair that he could feel so happy and complete again. He knew she understood him and wanted him to be happy. She would want that his heart continued beating overwhelmed as it did at that moment, wrapped in a sense of calm that could be translated into sublime joy.

_ _ _ _ _

"God, I can't wait another week to see the next chapter," Rhodey said excitedly.

"Most likely they will kill him," Natasha said convinced.

"If that happens, I swear I'll stop watching it," Bruce said in dismay.

"I don't think that happens, or at least I hope not," Steve said doubting.

"I'm sorry, but I'm with Romanoff," Tony said, nodding at Natasha.

"Well that's all for today. Okoye said she was connecting a little later to the meeting," Natasha said getting up and leaving the room. "Behave you guys."

Rhodey smiled and said he was going to sleep too, then Bruce followed him. The moment Bruce left the living room, Tony turned to see Steve who was already taking him by the neck to kiss him. Tony groaned with pleasure at the instant he tasted those lips again. And as if they coordinate a dance that both knew, Steve took him by the waist at the same time Tony moved to sit on his lap. They continued to kiss fervently until they both needed to breathe.

"I missed you," Tony said with his lips very close to Steve's.

"I missed you too," Steve told him and kissed him again. In a single movement Steve got up with Tony in his lap and they continued kissing.

"Are you _ man_-handle me, super soldier?" Tony smiled mischievously as he held himself with his legs around Steve, "Do you know my fantasies too?" He told biting Steve lower lip.

Steve groaned, "It feels good to take you like this," Steve told him by squeezing his buttocks.

"I need you to _ take _me, indeed," Tony kissed him hungrily while Steve headed to the elevator.

Steve called as he could the elevator while they were still immersed in stealing their breath away.

"Friday, my room," Tony said breaking the kiss just a moment to tell the AI where to take them.

“Yes, Sir,” replied the AI.

_ _ _ _ _

The next morning, Tony was in the lab checking his suit's reactor, thinking about some improvements he wanted to make. Soon after, Friday told him that the girl of the convention had arrived. He told the AI to indicate her how to get to his lab.

"Hi Tony, how are you?" Sarah said smiling in the lab door.

"Great, and you? he replied getting up from his desk. “Thank you for coming." Tony pointed her to come inside and take a seat.

"Well I can't be better if Tony Stark himself tells me to help him on a project," Sarah said very pleased.

Tony smiled and immediately went to the subject at hand. He explained to her about the few things that were missing from the project and the time he estimated could all be put in place. He was quite surprised at how quickly she understood everything and was very excited because that meant they could run it very soon.

"OK, so it would be a hot or cold forged hydraulic press?" Sarah asked from the table looking at the plans on the screen.

"Don't talk me dirty," Tony said joking with her and Sarah laughed. "I'll send you both designs, although for me it would have to be hot," Tony explained from his desk.

At that instant Steve was at the door with two cups of coffee, fulfilling his morning ritual as usual.

"Good morning," Steve said heading to the desk. Tony was focused on one of the screens.

"Good morning, Captain," Sarah said kindly from the table and saw Steve put the coffee cup on Tony's desk.

"Good..." Tony was going to say _ good morning _ when he felt Steve's hand on his neck to lift his face and steal him a kiss, "morning," Tony finished saying with his eyes closed. When he opened his eyes, he could see Steve's face of satisfaction at having surprised him.

"You need me?" Steve asked him, staring at him with a half smile.

"Yes," Tony said without thinking, but then rectified clearing his throat. "Eh, no. You remember..." Tony couldn't remember her name.

"Sarah," Steve helped him.

"Yes, she is helping me with the project. But let me know when we have the meeting," Tony told him, coming back to himself.

"Sure," Steve replied with a smile.

Tony saw how Steve nodded to Sarah, and he couldn't stop looking at him until he left the lab. He could not believe what had happened. A jealous Steve would definitely be his absolute downfall. And damn, how _ good _it felt.

Sarah cleared her throat, "Hot would be better. I think the same," she looked somewhat impressed but tried to hide it quite well when she spoke.

Tony turned to look at her, "Yes, that's what I thought," he said nodding.

After a few minutes, everything went back to normal, and both were able to focus on the project again.

_ _ _ _ _ 

"You can't move," Tony said hoarsely in Steve ear. "It's an order, soldier," pressing a kiss on Steve’s neck.

Steve was on the bed on his knees with his elbows on the mattress. Tony made his way back behind he stroking each muscle in his body with his hands. He went on testing Steve's skin with his lips as he listened to Steve breathe eagerly. Tony placed himself between Steve legs and kissed his buttocks only to then taste them with small bites that made Steve gasp. He pushed Steve’s thighs apart spreading him wider and revealing his entrance. Tony began giving him little kisses around until his tongue lightly brushed his entrance and he watched as Steve gasp while his hands grabbed the sheets beneath him. When Tony began to lick him properly, he listened in ecstasy to Steve's hot, tight moans. Tony kept playing with his tongue to moisten Steve's entrance, and his sudden gasps and sighs filled the silence of the room. He could feel Steve muscles twitching while he slipped his tongue inside him, loosening his entrance with each thrust. Steve's arousal could be felt all over his body, but his ragged breathing and those guttural groans were the ones taking over Tony's arousal. He started licking with his tongue Steve's perineum at intervals with his hole. Then, he slid half a finger into Steve's entrance and kneaded the sensitive walls, all while sucking Steve’s rim.

"Oh, God," Steve cried out, with a desperate groan.

Tony hooked his tongue roughly inside him entering the whole finger. And the other hand that was now working at his perineum reached further to grasp Steve's cock, stroking it quickly. Steve arched his back gasping loudly, moaning and thrusting back against Tony ministrations. He continued loosening and moistening his entrance feeling a great satisfaction from seeing and feeling Steve so affected and overwhelmed by the pleasure he provided him. Tony pulled away to tease Steve's entrance with two moistened fingers with lubricant. He watched his hole quiver as he swirled his fingers against it, he began to stroke and massage it until one lucky stroked found out the sensitive spot.

"Tony," Steve moaned his name, deep and throaty.

Tony realized his own cock was leaking precume loosely. But he wanted so much to please Steve that he promised himself a delayed pleasure that would be worth it. Tony kissed wetly at his soft damp hole now, fingering him at the same time, knuckling gently against it. Steve was thrusting back onto his fingers with every breath, groaning at every push.

"Please, Tony," Steve said desperately.

“Please what?” Tony smiled wickedly, thrusting him only with his tongue this time. Steve practically whined, his body shaking now.

"Fuck me," Steve huffed out.

Tony smirked, and while still holding Steve's hole open with his fingers, he darted his tongue in. Giving shallow licks to the inside making him gasped even more. But soon after Tony slowly pulled away and lined up to press the head of his cock against Steve’s opening. Steve cried out in pleasure as Tony pushed further and further in, filling him. He felt Steve trembled and shook as he pulled slowly out until only the head of his cock was caught on his rim. First he thrust slowly in, letting Steve feel him whole when he pushed relentlessly inside him. He did it again, and again, picking up a delicious pace that made them both groan ardently.

“Tony,” Steve said sobbing out, his back arching hard, and his head back. “Tony, oh God,” he panted, as whimpers and moans continued mingling together in one melody that please Tony's ears.

"I have you, Steve," Tony said out of breath. He knew he was touching Steve's prostate, so he focused his thrusts on hitting that spot over and over again. The force and fervor of Steve's orgasm did not take him by surprise when it started. Tony just stroked Steve's cock through it until he was shuddering and trembling against him. This drove Tony into a frenzy, as he shuddered and felt his whole body tightened. He thrust again over the edge of his orgasm, until one last thrust took him to the summit of pleasure.

_ _ _ _ _

A few seconds later Tony was at his side stroking Steve's back. He still was upside down on the mattress but looking at Tony with a smile of extreme satisfaction. 

"You could say we cross that off the list?" Tony asked raising an eyebrow.

"No, I wouldn't consider it yet," Steve said smiling.

"Oh, so you need to test it more. OK, I could never oppose to research," Tony said with a serious tone but smiling very pleased.

Steve laughed softly and approached him to kiss him. Tony sighed and looked at him deeply. 

"_Steve Rogers_. You know you've been a constant presence in my life since I was a child?,” Tony said smiling. “And of course at that time I hated you _ a little _ for being the perfect man in my father's eyes,” he stared at him. “But now I understand him," Tony said smiling broadly.

"I'm not perfect,Tony. You know that," Steve said looking down ashamed. 

"You are great man, Steve,” Tony told him with emphasis. “With your invincible integrity and unbreakable principles,” he said teasing him and saw Steve's shy smile. “You're the bravest man I've ever met in my life," he said sincerely.

"Love," Steve said, looking up to stare at Tony with loving eyes and caressing his face. 

Tony closed his eyes. It felt so good Steve called him _ Love_, he thought. Pepper and he used to call themselves like that, but Steve said it with such devotion. It made his heart felt replete of a captivating warmth. “Said it again,” Tony said with a sigh.

“Love,” Steve said to his mouth very close, and then kissed him. “Love,” kissing his face. “Love,” kissing his neck. “Love,” kissing him again.

Tony sighed every time he heard Steve say it. _ How could I feel so calm? _A pleasant calm invaded his soul as if Steve's voice was a mantra that hypnotized him making him feel alive. The sound of his voice was telling him the world was there again, and everything was at peace. Tony opened his eyes, and Steve was looking at him with so much love.

"I love you," Tony said staring at him. "I am in love with you, Steve Rogers," he took him by the neck. "_You_, I love you," and he kissed him trying to show him all that emotions that bewitched his soul and made him feel so alive.

\- - - - -


	10. Chapter 10

"Congratulations to the whole team who met in short time to get this project underway. But above all to the genius and creator of a better world with his inventions, Tony Stark," said the governor.

Applause and cheers were heard throughout the room. The team accompanied Tony on an evening to celebrate the start-up of the recycling project. Looking for a better world, the government was interested in proposing to implement his recycling plants designs in all industrial companies in the country. If they had to start over, rebuild a new world, what better way to start doing things the right way from the beginning. And Tony could not feel happier, it was a long purpose but he finally achieved it. Among his ideals, it had always been that any process could be done in the most efficient and possible way. Since the clean energy project on his tower, the world had not stopped and neither had he. However, in this new world there was hope, and this time he could accomplish another dream.

"Congratulations, Love," Steve whispered in his ear. They were at the reception waiting for the others who had gone for some drinks.

Tony turned to look at him, and Steve's pride smile captivated him. "You deserve 1% of the credit, for the coffees," Tony joked.

Steve laughed heartily, "Wow, I don't know if I feel flattered or disappointed."

"OK, 2%," Tony said doubting a little.

Steve kept laughing and Tony loved to make him laugh. At that moment Rhodey approached them with their drinks.

"Don't tell me, he already told you the percentage of merit you have," Rhodey told Steve smiling.

"2%, for the coffees!" Steve exclaimed.

"Dude, at least he gave you something. I once gave him some very good ideas about the War Machine suit. And yet it's just Tony Stark's design!" Rhodey said gesturing with his hands as if the name was a sign.

Tony laughed softly pleased to see them argue about him. Soon after, Natasha, Bruce, and Thor, who had come for the occasion, approached. There was another woman with them Tony did not recognize meeting before.

"Congratulations, Stark. I must introduce you to Valkyrie," Thor said smiling.

“Nice to meet, Mr. Stark,” said Valkyrie shaking his hand.

"Thanks, Point Break. Please, call me Tony. Very nice to meet you," Tony smiled at Valkyrie and shook her hand.

"Congratulations, Tony, you made it," Sarah said approaching to the group.

"No, please, thank you for helping me. And the team too," Tony raised his hand to greet a group of engineers gathered near them.

"It was a pleasure to help you. I am at your service for any other project you want," Sarah said gladly.

"I'll keep that in mind," Tony smiled at her.

"Tony, son, we thank you for what you have done for the city, for the country,” The governor said approaching. “Well, I must take the opportunity to thank each of you for the constant help. I hope to see you all in the tribute on Friday." 

"We will be there," Rhodey told the governor.

In two days a tribute would be made in the city center to honor the memories of the people the world lost. A year had passed since the disappearance of half of humanity. Tony couldn't help feeling a small stab in his heart.

Tony felt Steve's hand caress him in the back. "Are you alright?," he asked in a low voice.

Tony gave him a half smile. "I'm hungry," he said avoiding the subject. Steve looked at him knowingly and nodded. "Let's see what's good in the catering," Tony said pointing to the food.

"OK," Steve smiled. "How about we eat something?," Steve asked the rest and they all went to the tables.

_ _ _ _ _

Tony woke up, and Steve wasn't in bed with him. He must have gone to the gym, he thought. He went down to the kitchen looking for coffee, but it was strange no one had made coffee yet. He set the coffee machine and headed to the dining room; no one having breakfast. If he thought it through, the compound was very silent, and that was rare. He would go to find Steve at the gym and even better if he was already in the sauna, he thought smiling. He walked to the gym, but it was also empty.

"Friday, what's going on? Where is everyone?," He asked the AI.

"There's nobody here, Tony," Ultron's voice responded.

“Friday? It that a joke? Because it's a pretty bad one,” Tony said looking around.

“Oh dear,” Ultron said laughing. 

"Friday?," Tony spoke this time with a little more despair.

"Did you miss me?," Ultron asked mockingly.

"What the hell are you doing here?," Tony raised his voice. “Where is Friday?," he asked getting angry.

"What's it Tony, are you afraid of being alone?," Ultron asked laughing again. "It's just my friend and I to keep you company."

_ Where the hell was all of them? _Tony started running through the halls of the compound and found no one there. This was becoming a nightmare, no, perhaps he was dreaming and needed to wake up. He went to the door and when he opened it, the overwhelming silence was still there. _ I have to wake up; I have to wake up _, Tony told himself over and over. He ran to his lab. He needed to check what was happening. Ultron could not be there again.

"Come on Tony, don't be so rude. Why don't you say hello to my new friend?" said Ultron's voice ringing throughout the compound.

Tony arrived at the lab and all the screens were black. His cell phone on the desk didn't work either. He tried to turn on the computers, but nothing seemed to work.

"Stark," said a voice too familiar. Tony turned around and Thanos was right behind him. He didn't have time to touch his reactor when Thanos punched him against the desk. The pain felt real. How can he be dreaming if the pain felt so real? Tony thought on the floor. He touched his reactor twice, three times, but the nano particles did not cover him.

"It won't work, Stark," Thanos said showing him the glove with all the gems as he clenched his fist". You are the only one missing and the earth will finally be gone."

"Tony. Tony wake up," Steve could be heard far away.

Tony opened his eyes and saw he was inside his suit. He felt he was breathing hard. Suddenly, he focused his vision and could see Steve at his side very troubled. He tapped his chest and the suit disappeared. He was lying in his bed.

"Hey, are you alright?," Steve worriedly said touching his face.

Tony sat down with Steve's help. He felt his body tremble from head to toe as he continued to breathe hard. Steve stroked his neck and hand trying to comfort him.

"You were having a nightmare," Steve said softly.

"Yes. I touched the reactor to put on my suit, but it didn't work," Tony said, catching his breath a little.

"I saw you move restless. I tried to wake you up, but the suit covered you. I tried to override it, but it did not work either," Steve said concerned.

Tony hugged him, and Steve wrapped him in his arms.

"Everything is fine, Love," Steve whispered in his ear.

They stayed like that for a few minutes until Steve backed down, lying down with him. Tony hugged him tightly.

"You want to talk?," Steve asked.

"No," Tony said quietly.

"OK," Steve said stroking his back.

_ _ _ _ _

A few hours passed and the sound of an alarm woke Tony up. Steve turned it off and turned to see him. 

"Good morning. Did you rest?," Steve said stroking his face.

"A little yes," Tony replied by closing his eyes and burying his head in Steve's neck. "I don't want to go. We don't have to go."

"Hey, everything will be fine. I promise," Steve said quietly.

"I won't go," said Tony firmly.

"Come on, Love. You need to go," Steve said softly.

"I _ need _you," Tony told him.

"Well, I'll be there," Steve replied smiling.

"Then you'll come back to me," Tony explained as if that was the point.

"Tony, we must go," Steve said sighing.

Tony sighed deeply. After a few minutes, he replied. "OK."

Steve lifted Tony head. "Let's go to the shower," he said stroking his chin and Tony nodded.

In the bath, Tony opened the shower and went under the water, leaning his hands against the wall. He immediately felt Steve massaging his back to relax him. A year since everyone had disappeared, he thought. The pain eased, but it was still there. _I will miss you all my life, won't I? _Again the memories of his other love ones came to his mind too. _Happy, my faithful companion. Peter, to whom I had promised a better life._ Tony sighed deeply. _Why was it so painful today? Why does it seem everything is been repeated and revived with the same intensity? _Tears camouflaged with the water running, but his body felt weak. Tony felt Steve hugging him from behind, then he threw his head back leaning on his shoulder.

"When will it stop, Love? When will it stop hurting?," Tony said feeling his tears running down his face.

"It won't. It has to become part of us," Steve said with sadness.

They were like that for a few minutes, until Tony turned around. "You miss them," Tony told him with sorrow.

"I do," Steve looked at him, reflecting in his eyes the same pain for loss.

"How can you move on?," Tony said stroking his face.

"Someone has to," Steve gave him a half smile.

"I admire you. Have I told you?," Tony told him staring at him with loving eyes.

"Yes," Steve smiled looking down.

"I love you," Tony took his face to kiss him softly. 

Steve sighed. "Loving you keeps me going," he said, resting his forehead on Tony's.

"Love," Tony kissed him again.

They continued hugging for a few minutes, until both knew they had to get out of that comfort nest and face a reality that together seemed less painful.

"I feel so weak," Tony said with a sigh.

"Come here. I help you," Steve smiled at him taking the sponge to bathe him, and Tony couldn't help laughing softly. 

_ _ _ _ _

"The world on earth and in the universe changed in an instant a day like today. The pain is like a flame that burns in our hearts and right now we feel it hurts us deeply, leaving us breathless. Our beloved family, friends, partners, colleagues, classmates, neighbors, each and every person that once touch our lives. We will never forget them. They will never leave our side, and we will honor their memories, their presences and legacies in this world. Nevertheless, life must go on. We can move on. If the impossible came true one day, then we know there can be no limits to our imagination. We must continue, it is worth living. One day not too far away that flame in our hearts will not extinguish. But we will learn to live with it and understand its purpose. To fill our hearts with warmth, keep us alive. We will love them until eternity. We will live to honor their lives and our lives. We deserve to life fully. We owe to them and to the wonderful manifestation that is Life."

In the city center, hundreds of people were gathered to the tribute. The governor had put a platform from where several people would share some words about that day. He explained all the cities in the country had pledged to place walls with the names of all the people they had lost. It was a way to honor their presence with them. Then, he gave way to Steve, whom everyone now listened to carefully. In the crowd some tears and sobs were heard at his words. And it was his words spoke of an inevitable truth, Tony thought. They would live with the pain of loss forever, but he liked knowing that one day they would learn to live with it. Tony looked at so many people around him who suffered the same pain, and once again he understood the magnitude of what had happened. He promised himself he would live to make the world something better. He would do it. And this time it would not be of protecting it because of the fear of it lost. This time it would be born from that warmth of his heart that united him with everyone. Every creature that lived in this new world will have the right to have the best life.

"He's really good," Bruce said smiling softly.

"He is," Tony said with a smile too, and looking at Steve with devotion. From the stage, his eyes looked back at him. Tony loved him. He could feel it so clearly in his heart.

"I agree," Natasha said, wiping a tear from her eyes.

Tony looked at her and half hugged her stroking her shoulder. "I'm going to miss this opportunity to tease you," he said jokingly.

"Shut up, Stark," Natasha said smiling.

Suddenly the three heard a snort and turned to see Thor, who had also been crying.

"What? The Captain is very good," Thor said, wiping away his tears. And everyone laughed.

"We can go seeing the walls later," said Bruce.

"Yeah," Tony nodded.

"There goes Rhodey," Thor said, pointing to the platform now.

_ _ _ _ _ 

When the tribute was over, they all shared a few minutes of silence. Tony couldn't help remembering the silence in his dream. A shiver ran through his body, but he told himself it had only been a dream. Later, the governor invited them all to go to see the walls. Rhodey and Steve approached the rest of the team.

"Excellent speeches gentlemen," Natasha said smiling.

"Thank you, Nat," Steve told her smiling too.

"Thank you, but this one here caused many tears," Rhodey pointed to Steve.

Tony didn't look away from Steve. "You did very well, Cap," he said smiling.

"Thank you, Tony," Steve said, staring at him.

"OK, before you two put a scene in here. Why don't we walk to see the memorials?," Natasha said pointing at Tony and Steve. Everyone laughed and started walking towards the walls.

"You were very good too, buddy," Tony told Rhodey.

"Thanks, man," Rhodey replied with a smile. "I know it's a difficult day for everyone, but we've come this far and I think we can continue," he looked at the people around him.

"I think so too," Tony said nodding.

"I see you better," Rhodey told him pleased.

Tony immediately looked at Steve talking to Thor. "I feel better," he said looking at Rhodey.

"I'm happy for you," Rhodey told him putting a hand on his shoulder.

Tony nodded smiling.

_ _ _ _ _

While they were walking watching the walls, Steve and Tony separated from the rest walking closely to each other.

"It really was a good speech," Tony told him with a proud smile. "Definitely, my favorite so far."

"I hoped you to like it," Steve smiled at him.

They continued walking in silence looking to people reading the walls to find the name of their love ones. 

"Do you still miss her?," Tony asked him after a few minutes.

Steve looked at him and nodded. "I still miss her," he said with a sigh.

Tony nodded and continued looking the people around. His thoughts wandered about the different expressions of life before his eyes. Some people chatted happily, perhaps remembering pleasant memories of their love ones. People were crying, maybe with the same intensity as the first day. Others were placing flowers and praying. And he was very surprised of those hugging each other even though they had just met there. They were joined by the pain of loss.

"Thank you for making me come," Tony said ashamed.

"I'm here for you," Steve stared at him.

Tony stared at him too. "I want to kiss you so badly. I'm beginning to believe I have very little self-control around you," he told him doubting.

Steve laughed softly. "We can't, Love," he said.

"Don't call me _Love _ right now. It's dangerous," Tony said biting his lip.

Steve kept laughing, but he also licked his lip, as he always did when he wanted to kiss him. "OK, I'm losing this battle too. We need to go back with the others," he said smiling.

When they were walking back, Tony saw Pepper's parents near one of the walls. His heart clenched in his chest. He knew he would meet Pepper's parents at some point, but it was more difficult than he thought. I have to go to greet them, he told himself. Suddenly, everything good he had already felt again by walking next to Steve fell apart.

"Are her parents?," Steve asked following Tony's gaze.

"Yes," Tony said with a sigh. "Will you go with me?" He turned to look at him. He didn't know why he felt scared.

"Sure," Steve replied assuring him.

Tony turned to see Pepper's parents. "Good." He started walking towards them.

A few meters from Pepper's parents, his mother turned to see Tony.

"Oh Tony, what a joy to see you," Pepper's mom said with a smile approaching him to take his hand.

"Hi, Mrs. Pott. Nice to see you," Tony tried to smile.

"Hi Tony, how are you boy?," Pepper's father asked him, shaking his hand.

"I'm..." Tony shook his hand and then tried to speak, but the words seemed to escape his mind.

"I know, sweetheart," Pepper's mom said stroking his face. "We all miss her a lot," she said with a smile.

"Yes," was the only thing Tony could say.

"Thank you for everything you do for us," Pepper's father told Tony and then he turned to Steve. "Thank you Captain, for those kind words and for helping us too."

Steve, who was a few steps behind Tony approached. "We will always do our best to help."

"Oh Captain, my Virginia will never cease to be in my heart," Pepper's mother told him moved.

Steve smiled, nodding. "Unfortunately we have to go on," Steve told them with great shame.

"We understand. Tony, I loved seeing you, honey." Pepper's mom gave him a hug and a kiss on the cheek.

Tony smiled with a half smile and shook his hand again with Pepper's father.

"Take care," Pepper's mother was heard saying when Tony and Steve turned around.

They walked in silence for a few minutes and Tony suddenly stopped, touching his forehead.

"I need to go home," he told Steve.

"I'll write Nat we're leaving," Steve told him stroking his shoulder.

In the taxi they were both silent. Tony felt the caresses in his hand entwined with Steve's as he looked out the window. Images of the fight with Thanos came to his mind and he closed his eyes squeezing his forehead. _ Thank you for everything you do for us_, Pepper's father said. As the taxi arrived at the door of the compound, Tony got off very fast. 

"I'll be in the lab," Tony said without looking at Steve.

"Tony," Steve said but Tony kept walking.

Tony entered the lab and sat down resting his head in his hands on the desk. The images returned to him one after another.

"Tony," Steve said at the door, approaching.

"I need to focus. That is all," Tony said but did not look up.

"Talk to me," Steve calmly said standing behind him.

"They thank us for helping, but the images of the fight with Thanos came back to me and I cannot avoid thinking I didn't do enough," Tony said sighing.

"Don't do this to yourself, Love, please," Steve said begging as he put his hands on his shoulders.

Tony lifted his head and breathed deeply. "Sometimes it's so hard and my mind betrays me. It wants to go to that strange place where my thoughts seem..." he kept thinking. "_Corrupted_," he finished saying with a sigh.

"It is difficult. I must fight it every day too," Steve said taking a deep breath. "I told Vision we did not trade lives. Trying to save his, it seems only I have the heaviness of the consequence of my words. Half of a universe gone, because of my decision. We could have destroyed that stone sooner," Steve said with sadness.

Tony stood up. "You couldn't have known Thanos had them all," he said looking at him concerned.

"I know," Steve told him staring at him. "I have to fight those thoughts,” he sighed. “_Corrupted? _Yes. They can be our worst enemy."

"Banner told me I had to forgive her and myself. I understand now it wasn't just one time thing," Tony said leaning on his desk.

"It's a great lesson," Steve said thoughtfully. “Bruce is a great example of teaching us you can accept yourself from forgiveness." He leaned against Tony's side on the desk.

"It's a constant process then," Tony said thinking out loud. "This morning I saw myself creating a better future, and even more since I'm with you it seems that I can live in the present. How scary and envious the past can be sometimes," he said smiling.

"I must agree," Steve looked at him with affectionate eyes. "We must learn from it, but also let it go."

"The other day it occurred to me that after everything we've learned about how little we know about the universe. Maybe death is just going to another dimension," Tony told him smiling.

"Maybe," Steve laughed softly. "I hope those two get along better," Steve smiled wistfully.

"Didn't they like each other?," Tony said smiling amazed.

"Not much to say," Steve smiled. "But I think they would have gotten along with time."

"They were your best friends. They would have done it for you," Tony told him to make him feel better.

Steve smiled at him. 

It was incredible how they had survived so many tragedies, so many fights in their eagerness to protect the world. The turns of life had been so many until they reached this instant where they were together. Exposing their souls to the other, healing the wounds of theirs hearts. Tony had a feeling that seemed strange to so much pain in that day. He felt alive again.

Tony stood in front of Steve, took him by the neck and spoke to him with his forehead to his. "You bring me back to life," he said with a sigh.

"You are my life," Steve told him in a whisper drawing Tony to him.

Tony looked at him, and he was kissing him with all his might feeling Steve respond to him with the same fervor.

"I love you," Tony told him out of breath.

"I love you too," Steve said with a soft smile.

"Come here. I want to show you something," Tony told him going to the table with the projecting screen. He touched some keys and a suit appeared on the screen.

Steve came over and smiled when he saw it. It seemed to be a new Captain America suit.

"Is that a new suit?," Steve asked smiling broadly.

"Yep, it has everything that a Captain America suit should have, _ but _ with some improvements," Tony replied proudly.

"I love it," Steve said pleased. "When can I try it on?"

"Calm down, it's just a prototype I'm designing,” Tony answered him smiling. “But I'm very happy for your enthusiasm," he said satisfied.

"It looks great," Steve said gladly.

"I know, but I"m gonna miss that sexy ass of yours on your tight pants," Tony said teasing him.

"Hey, there are not that tight," Steve complained.

"Love, I must confessed to you,” Tony said approaching Steve. “They look deliciously tight," Tony was kissing him a squeezing his buttocks.

"You'll be fine?," Steve asked him, out of breath after another kissing session.

"I will be," Tony assured him, and really felt it.

Steve kissed him slowly. "I'll go to the support center," he said looking at him with apprehension.

Tony smiled. "I'll be fine. I promise," Tony assured him again. "I will think about how we will comfort each other tonight," he said with a mischievous smile.

Steve smiled. "You read my mind," he said and kissed him.

Tony took him by the hair and deepened the kiss again. "Go be a good boy," he said with a sigh, teasing him.

Steve smiled and left the lab.

_ _ _ _ _ 


	11. Chapter 11

_ 31 December 2022, New Year Eve. _

"Congratulations on the wedding, and welcome back to Wakanda," Okoye said to Tony and Steve.

"Thank you. I'm trying to convince him to definitely move in here," Tony said smiling.

"You would be welcome," Okoye smiled broadly. "Enjoy."

They were in the party hall of the palace celebrating the new year. The whole team moved there to spend a few days. They were having a celebration in style as only Wakanda knew how to receive the new year. All were dressed very elegantly, there was a lot of food, drinks and the music recreated all the joy contained in the faces of those present. Everyone felt like being with the family and in the bottom of their hearts, they all felt united as one. For a couple of years now, they had come to celebrate the end of the year in Wakanda. And although technically Tony and Steve were on their honeymoon, they could not refuse to come and share with the rest of the team, the family.

"This is for me as for the rest of mortals going to Disneyland," Tony said enthusiastically.

"Your own amusement park but about technology. I know, you tell me every time we come," Steve said smiling.

"At least, let's buy a house here and come more often," Tony told him begging innocently.

Steve laughed. "We already have it, Love."

"Well let's come more often," Tony smiled pleased.

"Next year we will come more," Steve said stroking his face and kissing him.

"You two can't stop," Rhodey told them approaching with Danvers on his side.

"Congratulations on the wedding," Danvers told them.

"Thank you, Carol. Good to see you again," Steve told her.

"Me too," Carol replied with a smile.

"With you I needed to talk," Tony said pointing to Carol.

"Jesus, Tony, we're on New Year's Eve! No work, you can't steal my girlfriend," Rhodey replied in amazement.

"One minute," Tony told him, pointing his finger.

Carol smiled and stroked Rhodey's arm. "It will only be a minute," she winked at Rhodey.

"These two are really hopeless," Rhodey told Steve. "You and I let's go for a drink."

_ _ _ _ _

"Those were the good times!" Thor exclaimed.

"Oh baby, you don't know enough battles," Valkyrie told him, taking a drink of her beer.

"I have 1500 years fighting," Thor said exaggerating.

Valkyrie raised her eyebrow.

"I must accept, you beat me on that. But that was a good fight," Thor said proudly.

Steve smiled glad to see the team talk cheerfully. He and Rhodey were on the bar waiting for their drinks.

"You arrived just in time," Rhodey told Steve.

"Yes, thankfully. We didn't want to miss the end of the year with everyone," Steve said to him with a smile.

"I could kill him for stealing my girlfriend that I had days without seeing, but he looks too happy," Rhodey said, nodding at Tony and Carol.

Steve smiled. "If in 5 minutes they don't stop. I'll help you."

"Or you'll run out of a husband," Rhodey told him, drinking from his beer.

Steve laughed and turned to look for Natasha. He hadn't seen her yet, but he knew she was there. Soon he realized she was alone on a balcony. He took the beer, told Rhodey he would go to say hello and headed to where she was.

"Why so lonely?," Steve asked Natasha.

"Barton," Natasha told him with a half smile. "Last time he was in Mexico. It was nothing pretty what he left behind," she said thoughtfully.

"I know," Steve nodded. "He continues fighting in his own way. Although not the most convenient."

"Last time I saw him, there was so much pain in his eyes," Natasha sighed. "I do not know what else to do."

"Do you know where he could go now?," Steve asked her.

"Yes," Natasha replied.

"Be careful Nat, please," Steve said with concern.

"If I'm always the one who saved your asses," Nat teased him.

Steve smiled. "I can't deny that."

"You asked him?," Natasha asked him taking the beer from his hand.

"I don't know how to do it," Steve said, blushing.

"You can start with a puppy first," Natasha told him.

Steve laughed. "You're very mean."

"You know he will love it. He loves you and will love to share that with you," Natasha sound sincere this time.

Steve turned to see Tony who was still entertained talking to Carol. Poor Rhodey, they said a minute, Steve thought. Tony turned to see him and winked at him. Steve couldn't be happier, there wasn't a second of his life he didn't feel grateful to be with Tony.

"Come on, lover boy. You can't be one minute away without you drooling for him," Natasha took him from the arm to carry him back inside.

Steve smiled embarrassed.

_ _ _ _ _

Steve was at the bar again asking for another beer when he felt arms wrapped him from behind. He smiled very pleased.

"Until you left Carol alone for a moment," Steve said taking the beer. "Thanks. Could you give me a scotch, please?," Steve told the bartender and turned to see Tony.

"I saw you looking at me from the balcony," Tony told him very close. "You missed me?" he said with a playful smile.

"I was worried Rhodey wanted to be with his girlfriend," Steve told him taking a drink of his beer. He wanted to play hard, but he couldn't help smiling.

Tony bit his lower lip. "Playing the bad boy, Captain," Tony raised an eyebrow, looking at him fiercely.

The bartender spoke to Steve to give him the drink and Thor approached at the same time.

"In five minutes we will welcome 2023 and what better way to receive it! With my loving lady and my best friends!" Thor told them excitedly. "Two beers, please," he told the bartender.

Steve took the whiskey and gave it to Tony, who kept watching him.

"It will be a good year," Steve told Thor smiling, and trying not to think about the heat he was feeling in the middle of December.

"Come on," Thor told them, nodding to the middle of the room where everyone was gathering.

Tony took a sip of his drink, and Steve saw those brown eyes he loved so much, looked at him with the same desire he felt at that moment. He couldn't help licking his lip and saw how Tony directed his gaze to his lips. They stood together with the others in the middle of the room waiting for the end of the year count. They were very close looking at each other without saying a word. Theirs eyes showed everything they were feeling.

"5... 4... 3... 2... 1... Happy New year!" Everyone screamed, and Steve took Tony by the neck to kiss him deeply. And that was not a chaste kiss to celebrate the end of the year. It was a kiss of passion that spoke of an eternal desire between them.

"Happy New Year, Love," Tony told him without apart his lips much.

"Happy New Year," Steve smiled and kissed him again.

Soon after, Tony sighed _Love you, _ and both turned to say happy new year to the rest of the group.

_ _ _ _ _

Steve was watching Wakanda's wonderful night sky from the balcony of his room. The city was wonderful at night, and the stars and fireworks brightened everything around. He was in the palace bedroom that had been given to them to spend the night. Tony was saying goodbye to Rhodey who would return with Carol early in the morning. While they, as part of a honeymoon that seemed delightfully endless, would stay a few more days in Wakanda. Steve heard the door of the room open and saw the man of his life enter with the most wonderful smile he had seen in his life. Tony immediately approached him to kiss him. Steve wrapped him in his arms, groaning when he felt the bite of his lower lip.

"Make love to me," Tony said with a hot sigh.

"Tony," Steve kissed and lifting him to take him to bed.

After enrapturing their lips of kisses that savored the breath of the other for a good while. They began to take off their clothes helping each other between more kisses and furtive caresses. When both were naked, they groaned intensely at the rubbing of their erections. Tony wrapped his legs around Steve's waist and they moved enjoying the friction. Steve began kissing Tony's neck, licking and sucking it and heard him moan in pleasure. He loved doing that; it was like eating from an insatiable delicacy. Then, he went down Tony's chest kissing him until he reached his cock and wrapped it with his mouth. Tony gasped his name and took the back of the bed with one of his hands while the other stroked Steve's hair. Every lick, every suck left Tony breathless, making him moan intensely and Steve couldn't help touching himself while looking at him.

"I want to cum with you inside me," Tony said, breathing heavily.

Steve smiled, got up and took the lubricant out of his suitcase. He stood beside the bed to look delighted at Tony. Tony looked at his erection and didn't resist getting on his knee to take his cock into his mouth. Steve gasped desperately at Tony's relentless sucking. He knew how to take him to the edge of ecstasy with the movements of his tongue in a very short time.

"Love...You'll make me..." Steve told him out of breath and saw Tony's mischievous gaze as he slowly backed away from his cock.

Tony lay down again with his legs open and Steve came over to kiss him. They kissed lustfully until Steve stepped back to take some lubricant and start loosening Tony's entrance. Steve saw him close his eyes when he started moving his finger inside him. He felt the twitch of his cock that leaked precum just by seeing Tony arousal. For an instant, he wanted to touch Tony's erection, but he knew if he did he could make him come. So he resisted the temptation and began to introduce another finger to open his entrance further. Tony moaned and began to move to the thrusts of Steve's fingers. When he introduced a third, he touched Tony's prostate making him cry in pleasure.

"Steve," Tony desperately said pressing the back of the bed tightly.

Steve lifted him a little to slowly introduce his cock and they both groaned. They stared at each other panting and Steve stepped back to push his cock harder this time. Tony arched his back and threw back his head shouting his name again. Steve began to move slowly, and Tony took him by the neck to kiss him. They started taking a pace that grew fast within the minutes. Both were so aroused it wouldn't take them too long to come. With each thrust both gasped louder, then Steve took Tony's cock in his hands, stroking it with the same intensity of his thrusts. Tony rose a little grabbing himself of Steve neck and shoulder, and a thrust from Steve made him squeeze him with his hands tightly, burying his nails a little. That drove Steve crazy who focused on thrusting him at that spot listening to Tony's ecstatic groans. Steve gave Tony's cock a stroke at the moment of a hard thrust. He felt Tony bite him between his neck and shoulder as he groaned, coming with great intensity. The ferocity of Tony's orgasm made him come only a few seconds later.

_ _ _ _ _ 

Later on they were in the Jacuzzi of the bedroom kissing while they drank champagne and ate from a cheese board. The palace's attentions seemed like those of a luxury hotel. Impossible to ask for more of a new year that promised good omens if this was just the beginning. Tony put the glass on the edge of the Jacuzzi to kiss his neck and Steve sighed in pleasure.

"You heal too fast. It started to disappear," Tony said caressing where he had bitten him.

Steve smiled. "I'm all yours."

Tony brushed with his tongue the spot. "A little kink of mine I still can't have," he sighed in his ear.

"Don't make you want to keep trying?" Steve said looking at him mischievously.

"_You. _ How can you be so good?" Tony said, stroking Steve cock, making him close his eyes and gasp.

"I'm yours. You can do whatever you want with me," Steve said panting.

Tony sank in the Jacuzzi, and Steve felt his cock been sucked underwater.

"God, Tony," said Steve moaning.

A moment later Tony came out of the water with his naughty gaze, approaching to kiss him and keep pulling his cock. Then, Tony introduced a finger in his entrance while continuing to stroke his cock and Steve was lost to his touch. He raised one of his legs, so Tony had more access to his hole. They were savoring their lips, and Steve was moaning at Tony's finger thrusts. Suddenly, Tony put just the tip of his cock in his entrance and began to stroke it very slowly.

"You're mine," Tony told him, sinking his cock completely and making Steve's fiery, hard moan echoed on the room.

_ _ _ _ _

The honeymoon followed by Italy, France and Spain. Since they were together, Tony had insisted Steve had all the vacations he had not had in his life. During those years, they had traveled all over the world, touring places Steve believed could only exist in the imagination of some painter. The memories of each moment lived with Tony fed the beating of his heart. He could recognize they were happy.

The world, on the other hand, continued growing to the adversities of that new era. However, people had become more resilient, the impossible could be achieved together and with effort. The team had also grown a little more, the missions were still there, and certain battles were still being fought. But everyone recognized their lives were not marked by victories, but by the common good of living well, in peace.

Today from a hotel room in Granada, leaning on the large window with a view of The Alhambra, Steve watched Tony sleep peacefully. The light of his reactor illuminated the room a little. He couldn't feel more grateful. In a few days, they would return to their home. The lake house that united them for the first time and now was their refuge from the world. Where they were only the two of them. Steve couldn't remember the exact moment he knew he was in love with Tony. He had only told himself he should move on and had done so for long time. For a while, he became attracted to Shannon and had learned to shut up his heartbeat when he was with Tony. And right there, when life gave him this day and each one he had lived with Tony, then all made sense. He had loved Peggy, but to live with Tony, knowing each other as they did now. The intimacy, the acceptance of the other, comprehending who they were, the good and bad moments lived, gave a greater meaning to love.

Suddenly, Tony woke up and looked for him in bed.

"Come closer, Love," Tony said sleepily when he saw him.

Steve smiled and went to bed. Tony hugged him and buried his head in his neck. Steve sighed_ Love you _and closed his eyes.

_ _ _ _ _

A month later, finally the trips, the visits to exotic places, the best honeymoon one could have in life was over and they returned to the routine. Tony was with Rhodey, while Steve was going to the compound. When he entered one of the compound's meeting rooms, he saw Natasha eating a sandwich.

"I knew I should bring something to eat," Steve said smiling and placing a bag in front of Natasha.

"Sometimes I could say that I love you, but it would be too much," Natasha said, taking the bag to open it.

Steve laughed and saw her take out the Chinese food.

"I take it back. I love you," she said biting a spring roll.

Steve kept laughing. "Tell me the news?" he asked her, sitting in front of her desk.

_ Oh! Hi. Hi! Is anyone home? This is Scott Lang. We met a few years ago, at the airport? In Germany? I got really big, and I had my mask on. You wouldn't recognize me. _

“Is this an old message?” Steve asked Natasha standing up looking at the screen.

“It's the front gate,” Natasha replied astonished.

_ Ant-Man? Ant-Man, I know you know that. I need to talk to you guys. _

_ _ _ _ _ 

Steve couldn't believe what he had just discussed with Scott and even less he was alive after so long. I needed to talk to Tony, he thought. He didn't want to scare him, but he needed him to be there with them.

"I'm calling Bruce," Natasha said looking at Steve.

"I'll call Tony," Steve nodded.

"Tony Stark, call that one, yes," Scott said eating Natasha's food.

Steve went down the hall to call Tony.

"Give me a second, Love," Tony told him answering the phone.

"No, Tony, I need you to come to the compound right away," Steve told him. He had intended to sound as calm as possible, but it didn't work.

"What happened?" Tony asked him sounding worried.

"We need to talk. We're in the meeting room," Steve told him this time trying to sound calm.

"OK. I'm on my way," Tony told him firmly.

Steve returned to the living room and Natasha was talking to Scott.

"Bruce is on his way," Natasha told him approaching.

"Tony too," Steve replied.

"Will all this be true? Do we trust him?" Natasha said softly with her back to Scott.

Steve looked at Scott who smiled at him. He nodded him.

"He seems to be telling the truth, but I don't understand what he was talking about," Steve looked into her eyes puzzled.

_ _ _ _ _

A few minutes later the door opened, Tony quickly entered. Steve approached him.

"Are you OK?" Tony asked worried.

"I am," Steve assured him, looking into his eyes, and Tony calmed down a bit.

"The others are OK, what happened?" Tony asked looking at the rest of the room. His eyes stopped on Scott, and Steve watched as Tony's mind connected everything in an instant.

Tony turned away from Steve and addressed Scott. "We thought you had disappeared like the rest," Tony said perplexed at the recognition of whom he was.

At that moment Bruce also entered through the door.

"What happened? Are you all alright?" Bruce said asking very worried too.

"Easy, big guy. Everything is fine, only we have a visitor," Natasha said, nodding at Scott.

Bruce was surprised to see him. "Are you Scott Lang?"

"Wow, so I have gained fame over time," Scott said pleased.

"The truth is, no, but we did have your record," Natasha said with a grimace.

"Scott, please explain to Tony and Bruce what you told us," Steve told him.

_ _ _ _ _

"It could be possible?" Steve asked Tony.

Tony looked at Bruce who looked at the floor.

"Quantum fluctuation messes with the Planck Scale, which then triggers the Deutsch Proposition. Can we agree on that?" Tony said to Bruce who nodded.

"In Layman's terms, it means you're not coming home," Tony said to Scott.

"I did," Scott replied.

"You accidentally survived. It's a billion to one cosmic fluke," Tony explained.

"But what does it mean?" Steve asked Tony.

"We have to find a logical and tangible idea that really achieves what he is proposing," Tony said looking at him and then at Bruce.

"Two heads think more than one," Bruce told him with a half smile.

_ _ _ _ _

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


  
  



	12. Chapter 12

Tony and Bruce had been locked up in the lab for 2 weeks, both were taking very short breaks to eat, but they really had little rest. Everyone was aware of what they were trying to create. A time machine, no matter how absurd it seemed, they wanted to go to the past and recover the stones. For now, they could only focus on being able to create the machine. The implications this could bring seemed too complicated to discuss them. The important thing was to take small steps that brought them closer to a possible solution.

Steve didn't understand much, to say nothing, of what Bruce and Tony were talking in the lab at the time. However, he could see the joy that lit up their faces when an idea seemed to be perfect for everything to work. But also the frustration when it didn't work. He wished he could help more than bring them the materials they needed or help them with small tasks he could understand. But if those two genius minds were fighting a colossus that seemed impossible and they were not succeeding. He honestly did not know what else he could to do to help.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck," Tony exclaimed in frustration.

"OK, that did not work. We'll try the other way," Bruce said trying to sound calm but his frustration could also be heard in his voice.

"I need to get out of here," Tony said and flew off of the lab.

"You both need to rest," Steve told Bruce worriedly.

"I know. We're so close, but we need to get away a little and see everything again. It will give us clarity," Bruce said thoughtfully.

"I'll try convincing him," Steve told him.

"Good luck with that," Bruce replied with a half smile.

Steve sighed and left the lab.

_ _ _ _ _

Tony was in the compound's garden. Some new members were exercising in the vicinity. Steve came over and stood by his side.

"It's just a missing piece. I know," Tony said looking around.

"You need to rest," Steve told him.

Tony sighed. "I don't know how to do it if I know I'm so close. I feel I shouldn't stop," he said looking into his eyes.

Steve stood in front of him. "You're the smartest and brightest person I've ever met in my life. If someone can achieve this, it's you," Steve told him stroking his face. He watched as Tony closed his eyes to his touch. "But you need to rest, Love. Let's go home a few days."

Tony rested his forehead on his chest and took a deep breath. "But I'm so close," he said defeated.

"Please," Steve told him.

Tony looked into his eyes. "It won't work," he said smiling.

"What?" Steve asked trying to sound like he didn't know what Tony was talking about.

"You with your puppy eyes and your warm voice are not going to convince me," Tony said staring at him.

"Please," Steve kissed him softly and felt Tony's soft moan.

"I shouldn't," Tony said sighing.

"Please," Steve whispered and kissed him again.

"1 day and we come back," Tony told him with his eyes closed.

Steve smiled with great satisfaction and kissed him again. "2 days."

Tony smiled.

_ _ _ _ _

It felt great to return home after those two weeks. Steve watched as Tony loved being there. From the moment they arrived, he looked more relaxed. Steve proposed a walk near the lake, spring was coming and they could use a good walk. They did and spent more than an hour touring their favorite places. Tony was sighing quietly and smiling again. It was true Tony had a great responsibility under his hands if they could achieve what they were proposing. Despite this, it was important he took a break to try to get his ideas in order.

When they got home, Steve cooked with Tony's classic help. Steal him the occasional kiss and serve the wine while he cooked. Tony explained to him as simple as he could what they were doing and yet it sounded too strange to Steve, but he hoped they could make it. For several years now, Tony had created many inventions of great use for them and the world. Even the improvements to their suits had been incredible. He had dedicated himself body and soul to do all the things he was passionate about. And Steve understood his passion and dedication when he set a goal, but he needed at least 2 days to rest and then he could continue. Steve would take care of it.

They had dinner, chatted a little more and Steve took him to the shower. He made an effort to distract Tony, so to speak, until he was tired. After making love to him, seeing him finally asleep in bed put a smile on his face. Steve stroked his face watching him sleep peacefully. _ His bright man. _ He didn't want to think about what could happen if they could really bring them all back. He wanted that with his whole being, but he had to admit to himself he was also afraid. Afraid of losing this second chance life had given him. Afraid of losing _ him_. A part of him recognized he remained true to his values, ideals and would sacrifice his life for any other human being. He had dedicated his life to justice and honor, and always would. But it hurt in his soul to think he knew he would let whatever happened happen, even if it meant a last sacrifice.

_ _ _ _ _

The next morning, Steve was in the kitchen making coffee while Tony worked in the living room. He had lost the battle, and the next day Tony was working again. At least, he had managed for him to rest for a day and sleep about 8 hours in a row. Maybe he had half lost, he told himself smiling. He went to bring Tony's coffee.

"Shit," Tony said in amazement.

"What happened?" Steve asked beside him.

"Shit," he replied smiling broadly. "I did it," Tony approached him to kiss him effusively.

Steve laughed happily. "I knew you would make it," he said taking him by the neck and giving him another kiss. "You're a genius!"

"We have to go back to the compound right now," Tony said enthusiastically. "Friday, call Bruce," he said taking his phone and heading for the stairs. "We had breakfast on the road, Love," he shouted happily as he went to their room.

Steve couldn't be happier and proud. He was completely sure they were going to make it. They would bring everyone back. They would.

_ _ _ _ _

_ Five years ago, we lost. All of us. We lost friends... We lost family... We lost a part of ourselves. Today, we have a chance to take it all back. You know your teams, you know your missions. Get the stones, get them back. One round trip each. No mistakes. No do-overs. Most of us are going somewhere we know. But it doesn't mean we should know what to expect. Be careful. Look out for each other. This is the fight of our lives. And we're gonna win.Whatever it takes. Good luck. _

_ _ _ _ _

«I need to see him,» Steve said worried, passing around from one side to the other.

«I know, but you need to calm down, Steve,» Natasha said trying to convey some tranquility to a quite difficult situation.

They were in one of the hospital corridors. Steve was restless, breathing hard. He needed to see him. He needed to know he was fine.

«How can I Nat? He used the damn glove! Half of his body was burned, and now he is out of intense care room and I cannot see him!» Steve said yelling.

«Dammit Steve, you need to calm down,» Natasha spoke in a lower but menacing voice. 

«He needs...He is my...» Steve could not finish the phrases without his voice breaking. 

«He needs you, and yes, he is your husband. We know that, but she doesn't,” Natasha said pointing to Pepper that was crying a few meters away from them with her parents at her side.

Steve took a deep breath. «I almost lost him, Nat,» Steve said with pain is his voice.

«But you didn't. And I give him a week and you two will be fighting as the grandpas you both are,» Natasha told him trying to make him feel better.

Steve smiled. «He always wins,» he said with a sigh.

«Everything will be fine,» Natasha assured him.

Steve nodded and took a deep breath.

I had to calm down, Steve told himself. For the first time in his life, he seemed to lose his mind. A few weeks ago he had told himself he would understand the sacrifice they would make for humanity, but now he could not bear the thought of losing Tony. He was not as strong as he thought he could be. His world made no sense if Tony was not in it. Steve turned and looked at Pepper. She was crying while her parents comforted her. Within a few hours of returning, she had already found a way to know where Tony was, and she was immediately there waiting. Steve had to understand her situation and respect it too. He knew what Nat meant. Pepper was trapped in whatever place they were, and returned and finds out she almost lost her boyfriend, her _ fiance_. It was a very complicated situation to cope with. He had to be strong. 

  
  


_ _ _ _ _

Steve entered the room and when he saw Tony, his heart griped in his chest. He immediately was by his side. Tony was with an oxygen mask, asleep. He seemed relax, peaceful even when part of his right arm, chest and neck was burned. Steve took his left hand a squeezed it.

«Love, you are going to be fine,» Steve said with a tight in his throat. «I love you.» 

Steve noticed Tony was starting to wake up. He tried to move his right arm and hissed at the pain.

«Love, tried not to move,» Steve said carefully.

Tony opened his eyes with heaviness and made an attempt to take the mask with his other hand, but Steve took it for him.

«Steve,» Tony said with a smile.

«I'm here, Love,» Steve got closer. «You need to rest.» 

«We won,» Tony said with a half smile.

«We did,» Steve smiled while a tear was running through his cheek.

“Are you OK?” Tony asking him concerned.

“I am now,” Steve replied with a soft smile.

Tony smiled. «I love you,» he closed his eyes.

«I love you too,» Steve said kissing him on the forehead.

Steve caressed his face and heard a pleased sigh from Tony. He was alive, he was there with him. His clever, stubborn, amazing man. He loved him as he has never loved someone in his entire life. For the most terrifying minutes of his life he thought he had lost him. When he saw him, he felt an agonizing pain in his heart that left him breathless. He ran to his side and time seemed to be in slow motion. His legs were not fast enough, his strength was not enough until he reached his side and saw him lying on the ground. Rhodey and Peter had approached him to help him. And when he was at Tony side, he saw him smile and say his name with a sigh to then pass out. They helped him, and with Strange's help took him to the near hospital. Tony hadn't told him he had modified the suit, so he could use the stones. If Steve was honest with himself, if Tony had told him, he wouldn't have accepted it. Tony knew him too well. In the end, they were both willing to sacrifice their lives. But when the time came, Steve just wanted it to be him the one who made any sacrifice.

  
  


— — — — —

  
  


Steve awakened with the noise of a nurse entering to the room. He was on the chair next to Tony's bed. He had stayed up all night watching Tony sleep, but at a moment of dawn he felt his eyes closing to exhaustion. He didn't want to rest, but his body didn't agree with him and at some point he fell asleep. He saw the clock in the room. A couple of hours had passed.

«Good morning,» the nurse said smiling.

«Good morning,» Steve replied. He got up to see Tony who was still sleeping.

«Is better if he sleeps. Less painful,» the nurse explained him while changing some vials.

Steve nodded and looked at Tony. He was so quiet and serene. 

«Are those painkillers?» He asked her worried.

«Yes, it is a severe burned. But he will be fine soon enough to celebrate what he has done for all us,» the nurse said looking at him with admiration. «He is having the best treatment. We all are sure of that,» she looked at Steve with a sweet smile.

«Thanks,» Steve said overwhelmed.

«Please, thanks to all of you, for what you've done. I have my family back because of you, because of him. This is the least I can do,» the nurse said kindly.

Steve nodded again, not knowing what to say. Suddenly, someone was knocking the door. Pepper was standing at the door.

«Hi, can I come in?» Pepper asked quietly.

«Yes, I finished here,» the nurse told her.

«Hi, Steve,» Pepper said with a soft smile and went to Tony's bed.

«Hi, Pepper,» he replied.

«How is he?,» she caressed Tony face.

«Stable, the nurse told me it was better if he sleeps. It won't be so painful that way,» he explained to her.

«Are you OK?» Pepper looked at his arm. «Did you rest?» she asked concerned.

«I'm fine,» Steve said nodding and looking at Tony. 

«He always wins, no matter how crazy his ideas are. He is the most stubborn man in the world,» She said looking at Tony with tenderness.

Steve smiled, and he could see the love in Pepper eyes while looking at Tony. She seemed tired, like she hasn't sleep either. She approached Tony and gave him a kiss in the forehead. Tears were running through her face. 

«Can I stay here?» Pepper asked shyly.

«Yes, please, you don't have to ask,» Steve said ashamed.

Pepper nodded, took Tony's hand and squeezed it.

  
  


— — — — —

It had been several hours and Tony was still sleeping. The nurse had kindly brought some breakfast and coffee to both of them. They hadn't talked much, both were just watching Tony. Suddenly, Tony moved, and Steve was by his side. He was awakening. Tony opened his eyes and saw Steve.

«Hi,» Tony smiled at him. «Can I have...» Tony tried to say.

«Water,» Steve said for him and brought the glass of water from the nightstand.

Tony drank a few and then closed his eyes. «Come closer, Love.»

Steve looked at Peeper who was crying looking at Tony. He didn't know what to do for a second, but he approached him.

«Tony,» Steve said quietly.

Tony opened his eyes and looked at him but followed Steve eyes.

Pepper was crying but with a smile in her face.

«Peps,» Tony said amazed. «You are here.»

Pepper came closer and caressed his arm. «Hi,» she said smiling. 

«You are here,» Tony repeated trying to touch her face. She leaned taking his hand, kissed it and put it on her cheek.

«I am,» she told him. 

«Peps,» Tony said with a broken voice. «I missed you.»

«I missed you too, Tony,» Pepper was sobbing.

«Please, don't cry,» Tony said caressing her face.

«These are tears of happiness. I'm glad to see you again,» Pepper smiled and wiped her tears with her hand.

«Me too,» Tony looked at her with tenderness.

«Are you OK? Tony asked her worried.

«I am now,» Pepper answered smiling.

«I missed you so much,» Tony sighed.

«I'm going to leave you to rest, and I'll be back in a couple of hours,» Pepper said kissing him in the forehead and his hand.

«Peps,» Tony said softly.

«I'll come back,» Pepper smiled again, but she looked overwhelmed and went to the door. She stood there looking at both of them. «Try to rest,» she said with a soft smile.

«She is back,» Tony sighed looking at the door.

«Yes, she is,» Steve said looking at him with soft eyes.

Tony looked at Steve. “Is everyone fine? I saw the kid,” he asked as if realizing what had happened.

“Yes, they are. He is fine,” Steve assured him.

“You haven't sleep,” Tony said not as a question, but as an affirmation.

“It's fine. I am OK, too,” Steve tried to sound convincing. 

“Your arm,” Tony said frowning.

At Tony's eyes the concern began to show. In his face Steve could see the way in which that bright mind was waking up and really understanding where he was and what they had lived.

“I'm really fine, we're all fine. The world, the _ universe _is back on track. We made it. You made it possible," Steve told him in a very calm tone, trying to make him understand everything had gone well.

Tony relaxed a little when he heard him. He closed his eyes for a moment and took a deep breath. “Come closer, Love,» he said as his eyes longed for him when he saw him. Steve smile and went closer.

«You need to rest,» Steve said leaning his head on Tony pillow with his face closer to his.

«I need you,» Tony said looking at him.

«I'm always here, Love,» Steve caressed his face.

«I love you,» Tony whispered.

«I love you too,» Steve said with a sigh.

Tony closed his eyes.

_ _ _ _ _


	13. Chapter 13

"How is he?" Natasha asked.

"Asleep. He wakes up for moments, but he can't be conscious for a long time," Steve replied.

They were outside Tony's bedroom, sitting in the hospital corridor.

"I brought some clothes for you to change," Natasha gave him a small backpack.

"Thank you, Nat," Steve smiled. "They told me it would take a couple of weeks to lower all the inflammation and control any possible infection. Then, they can do the regeneration treatment," he explained her.

"That's great," Natasha nodded. "By the way, everyone wants to come to visit you two, but I have them under control," she said smiling.

"Is everyone fine?" Steve asked smiling too.

"The world is a bit chaotic out there, but I think everything will return to calm in a couple of days," Natasha explained him. She seemed convinced.

"I imagine it's normal," Steve sighed.

"You have to be strong, Steve," Natasha told him. "The worst is over. But even if things get complicated, you both will make it. It won't be easy."

"Nat," Steve took a deep breath. "How can you see it so clearly?"

"It's the human condition, my friend," she half smiled and put a hand on his shoulder.

"I don't know how strong I can be when it comes to him," Steve lowered his head.

"You have to,” Natasha sighed. “OK, I will agree to those two visit you. They'll make your day," she said smiling.

"I'd like to see them," Steve smiled.

_ _ _ _ _

  
  
  


In the afternoon, Pepper returned to visit Tony. Sam and Bucky arrived just after. Steve knew Natasha had something to do with it. He couldn't adore her more. When he left the room, his heart skipped a beat when he saw his two best friends standing in the hallway. He immediately went to hug each one.

"I'm so glad to see you both," Steve told them with a wide smile.

"And we, man," Sam said smiling.

"How are you?" Bucky asked him.

"Good. Much better now I see you two," Steve told them happily. He couldn't believe he had them in front of him. The world really was back.

"So, you went from fighting to getting married, huh?" Sam said, frowning.

"Shut up, Wilson. How is he?" Bucky asked.

"Improving," Steve replied laughing.

"He was very brave," Bucky told him.

"He is," Steve said sighing.

"Does this imply Shannon is available?" Sam asked, and Steve kept laughing a good time with them.

  
  


_ _ _ _ _ _

  
  
  


A week later Tony was already conscious and awake for much longer; the wounds were healing quite well. Pepper visited him every day and when Happy and Peter came to visit him too, Tony couldn't be happier. As always as restless as he was, he wanted to leave the hospital and managed to arrange for them to go to an apartment in the city center where he would receive all the necessary care. Steve for his part was glad to see him improve and even more to know the rest of the team were helping in everything they could out there. All united trying to put some order. However, the issue of returning the stones was pending. They would have to rebuild a machine to make the journeys to return them. The whole team would meet, and after all this time, it was _ everyone_. They were going to plan how to proceed with the stones.

«I can handle it,» Tony said exasperated.

«You will hurt yourself,» Steve told him. He was behind him looking at Tony trough the mirror. 

«Let me help you,» Steve said to him.

«Fuck,» Tony said annoyed. He cut himself with the shaver.

They were in the bathroom. Both took a shower together, and Steve helped Tony the best he could in the bath. But now Tony insisted he could shave himself.

«Jesus, how can you be so stubborn?» Steve said laughing softly and kissing him on the shoulder.

«Don't fucking laugh at me, Rogers,» Tony said still annoyed.

«I prefer, Mr. Stark,» Steve whispered in his ear.

Tony stared at him through the mirror. «You know what, Mr. Stark. It just a matter of coordination of my left hand. I can do this.» He tried again and succeeded with a part of his beard.

«OK,» Steve a smiled and kiss him on the back of his neck. «I'm going to get dress.»

While Steve was dressing, he heard some hisses from Tony. It had only passed another week, but he was getting tired of not being able to do things by his own. Tony was so independent and proud he wanted to shave himself to only feel he could do something alone. He reminded him of someone, Steve laughed softly. At least, the wounds were almost heal, he thought. Very soon, Tony could receive the treatment Cho had created. Suddenly, Steve turned to see Tony when he got out the bathroom. He had some small cuts but was very happy to have succeeded. Steve approached him.

«Would you let me help you now?» Steve asked him kissing him softly.

Tony sighed, «Yeah.»

«Tell me what you want to wear,» Steve told him and Tony went to the closet and took his clothes.

Tony put the clothes on the bed, and Steve approached him. He stood in front of Tony to take his towel and threw it in a chair. Tony was staring at him with a look in his eyes that didn't talk about dressing at all. Steve smiled pleased and felt Tony take him by the neck to kiss him. Steve kissed him back, but Tony made a movement that caused him pain. 

"Fuck, I can't even kiss you," Tony said annoyed again.

«Did you hurt?» Steve worriedly asked looking at his body.

«I'm fine, Love. It's my proud who is hurt,» Tony half smiled.

«In a few days we would go with Cho,» Steve caressed his face and kissed him softly.

"The things I'm going to do to you when I'm better," Tony said smiling maliciously.

«It's that a promise or a threat?» Steve asked raising an eyebrow. He couldn't help smiling.

«Both,» Tony stared at him.

Steve licked his lips and shook his head smiling. He helped him dressing and both went to the meeting.

  
  


— — — — —

  
  
  


Steve and Tony entered the meeting room of one of the Stark Company buildings. When they were inside, the team stood up and started clapping. Steve smiled, turned to see Tony, and started clapping too.

"Okay, I deserve it," Tony said pointing everyone to continue clapping. Everyone smiled.

"Thank you all for coming. We are glad you are back. Finally, we are all together again," Steve said when everyone stopped applauding.

"Thank you all. For the effort to bring us back," said T'Challa.

"Now we have an important goal in mind," Bruce spoke. "Return the stones."

"We have to build the machine again to be able to return them," Tony said.

"Count on me for anything," added Zuri.

"Great. We'll need as much help as possible. That way we'll return them as quickly as possible," Tony said.

"I think only one person should go," Rocket told them. "It'll be much faster and more efficient. Build a smaller portal, and we already know where and how to return them."

"I offer to return them," Clint raised his hand.

"We'll see that later. But it seems like a good idea," Steve said looking at Tony who stared at him for a few seconds before answering.

"Let's build a smaller portal. I agree," Tony replied.

"Another important point is to continue helping to stabilize the situation of many people who have returned," Rhodey explained.

"It's being very difficult to adapt. We have to keep helping," Natasha said.

They continued discussing containment plans in the face of the different situations that were occurring in the different cities and countries of the planet. They would also begin building the portal very soon. When the meeting was over Tony and Steve stayed in the room.

"It doesn't have to be you," Tony said worriedly.

"We'll see," Steve said avoiding talking about it.

"Steve," Tony approached him. "It doesn't have to be you."

"Someone will have to go," Steve stared at him.

"But it could be any other," Tony told him annoyed.

"Hi," Pepper leaned out the door. "Sorry if I interrupt. I was told the meeting was over."

"Hi, Peps. Apparently, the discussion is over too," Tony looked at Steve and went to greet Pepper.

"Hello, Pepper," Steve greeted her. "I'll be with the others," Steve said addressing Tony.

"Hi, Steve. Nice to see you," Pepper said with a smile.

  
  


_ _ _ _ _

  
  


Tony received Cho's treatment after another week. He and Bruce even fused the technique a little with what they had learned by making the Extremis formula. In the end, his wounds healed and his skin regenerated quite well. Neither of them talked about the issue of who should return the stones. However, Steve was totally sure it was a fight between them they were simply avoiding. He was heading to the living room of their apartment when he heard people chatting. Tony was talking to Pepper, but it didn't seem like they had heard him arrive. He hesitated if should enter to the room so he stood stopped about to enter.

"You were and _still_ are the CEO of the Stark Company. It's a lifetime position!" Steve heard Tony say.

"You survived without me all these years, Love," Pepper said and Steve realized there was silence after her words.

"I'm sorry. That sounded bad I didn't mean it like, and I used to tell you..." Pepper was speaking nervously.

"It's alright. I understand."

It was sadness in Tony's voice what Steve could recognize. He took a deep breath and left the apartment trying not to make noise. He needed to walk for a good while.

  
  


_ _ _ _ _

  
  
  


Two hours later Steve returned to the apartment and found Tony working on the designs of the portal.

"I think one month and everything will be ready," Tony said enthusiastically.

"Perfect," Steve replied.

Tony looked at him. "Are you alright?"

"Yes, a little tired. I think I'll go to bed," he said, turning around.

"Love?" Tony told him and Steve felt his heart clench in his chest. He did not understand why he could not stop overthinking.

"mm?" Steve turned around and watched him approaching.

"We don't have to argue. I understand why you want to go. It's fine," Tony told him kissing him. "Everything will be so perfect. I'm not afraid of anything going wrong. And, I trust you," he said looking at him with loving eyes.

Steve look at him, took him by the neck and kissed him with all the intensity of the love he felt for him. He wanted to erase all doubt, every thought that made him feel so lost and insecure. He wanted to seal on his lips he was Tony's completely. He had Tony there with him, in his arms and that was what mattered.

"I missed you too," Tony said breathlessly.

"I love you with everything I am," Steve told him staring at him.

"Steve," Tony looked at him overwhelmed and kissed him again.

  
  


_ _ _ _ _

  
  


A month later as Tony had said, the portal was ready. First, they would do a couple of tests before returning the stones. The compound was also rebuilding quite quickly. Gradually everything was returning to normal. They were still in the city apartment and Tony and he missed their home too much. But both wanted to return when they had returned the stones. As for Pepper, Steve realized he had to leave fear behind. She was an important part of Tony's life, and he understood it. Suddenly, he heard Tony entered the dept. He was on the kitchen putting a glass in the sink when he saw Tony approached the counter opposite to him. He leaned on without saying a word. Steve came closer to him, stood in front, and gave him a quick kiss on the lips.

«What is it, Love?» Steve asked touching Tony's face.

Tony stared at him for a few seconds and hugged him hiding his face in his neck.

«Hey, is something wrong?» Steve said concerned.

Tony broke apart from the embrace and left the kitchen. Steve was stunned for a moment while watching him leave. Soon after, he went to the living room and saw Tony walking from side to side.

«Pepper is pregnant. She already was five years ago, but for them was so little time. Then you might think is an impossible 5 years pregnancy, but no… She was, and _ she is _ pregnant with my child,» Tony was speaking in a frantic way with a lot of nervousness. «And I dreamed about it, twice. I dreamed she was pregnant the day before Thanos happened, and even a few years ago. I had that rare dream of a crib in a middle of a dark room. In the dream Pepper told me why I could not see them? There was a beautiful baby girl in the crib. But how could I? How could I have known?» he finished saying with exasperation.

«You couldn't,» Steve replied looking lost. His eyes were fixed at a point on the floor.

«I definitely should dedicate myself to be a fortune teller!» Tony said laughing with sarcasm.

«What is going to happen?» Steve looked at Tony, but he noticed Tony did not want to see him.

«I don't know,» Tony said not looking a Steve, finally stopping and resting one arm on the chimney. He stood there in silence looking lost.

«Tony,» Steve said carefully.

«I think it would be best if I am alone for a few days,» Tony said without turning.

Steve approached and was in front of him. «Tony, what is happening?» He was starting to worry.

Tony turned away from Steve, and started walking back and forth again. «I don't know what is happening, Steve. Do you think I know what I have to do? I don't fucking know!» Tony shouted out still not looking at him.

«Calm down. This must be very hard to bear. I understand,» Steve said in a calm voice. «Could you looked at me, please?» he asked kindly. 

Tony stopped and looked at Steve. «I don't know what to do,» he said defeated.

Steve stared at him for a moment. “I'm afraid you do,” his voice contained a profound sadness.

“How can you possibly know me better than I do?” Tony said frowning. He began passing from one side to another again.

“What is happening?” Tony repeated Steve words. “Since Pepper came back, something has been growing inside me,” Tony said thinking out loud. “I was with Pepper today, and everything came back to me,” Tony stopped and looked at Steve with concern. “All the love I feel for her has awaken. And the grief is finally over…” He immediately looked down and continued walking. “We talked, we laughed as we used to do. And for a moment I wanted to kiss her, hug her. Make love to her…” Tony said afraid now, looking at Steve, as if saying those words he feared something else.

“I think it is…” Steve started to say.

“What? Normal?” Tony asked in disbelief. “Are you going to say that is _ normal _that maybe I am afraid of wanting to return to her?”

“I do,” Steve said with pain in his eyes. “It does not have to be complicated, Love.”

“I'm saying that _ maybe _ the possibility of returning with Pepper goes through my head. As if I want to go back to what I had with her, so we could have a future together. Because a fucking monster stole _ our time_, _ our world_. Where we had planned to be parents, where we loved each other..." Tony said with dismay and fear at the same time.

Each word felt like a stab in Steve's heart. What he feared so much was happening. He could understand it. They loved each other. Pepper and Tony were happy, and they had lived loving each other for so long, until that fateful day. But understanding that didn't stop him from feeling his world was breaking apart. However, he promised himself he would be strong. He took strength, and taking a deep breath began to speak.

"You have the opportunity you once lost. This is an extraordinary situation. It had never happened in the life of anyone, ever. It happened to you, and it must be terrifying." Steve said trying to sound comprehensive, while also containing all the pain that was breaking his heart. “And become a father. I know how you wanted that.”

“_You,_” Tony said in a desperate tone, looking at Steve. “Then I see you and everything vanish because of _ you_…” Tony said with a broken voice. 

Steve's eyes were glassy, contained with unreleased tears. He was approaching Tony very slowly.

“I need to go,” Tony said worried without moving, staring at Steve.

Steve was in front of him. “Stay with me,” he said in a whisper, and Tony closed his eyes.

“I need to go,” Tony repeated out of breath and made an attempt to leave, but Steve was hugging him from behind.

Steve buried his face in his neck, “Stay with me.”

“Love, _ Steve,_ please,” Tony was begging him.

“Stay with me,” Steve repeated, and this time each word vibrated with the strength of his pain.

“I want to go,” Tony said forcefully, and Steve released him from the embrace.

  
  


_ _ _ _ _

  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Stay with Me (Lorraine Ellison song) 
> 
> Remember you said you'd always gonna need me...


	14. Chapter 14

Five days had passed since the last time he saw him. For Steve, it felt like an eternity. They always had talked, even when they weren't close to the other. It was so strange not to be able of speaking with him. And it wasn't about him not having the strength or the tortuous desire to talk to Tony. He knew he should give him time, space to think. But the waiting was still eternal. While Steve was running that morning, his mind could not stop thinking. _ What if_. But he knew he should not let that thought come around. Later in the morning, they would finally have to meet. Tony and Bruce were going to test the portal. They built the machine in one hangar of Tony's depots. However, they were going to meet first in one of the offices to discuss the plan with the whole team. After days without seeing him, he was trying to run out all the anxiety he had never felt before in his life. 

«On your left,» Steve said to Sam when he passed by him. There was always time to play with him, he thought smiling.

«On your right,» Bucky also said to Sam.

«I don't fucking know why I agreed to come exercising with you two,» Steve heard Sam yelled in the distance.

Steve and Bucky were at the same pace running. They had given several rounds to the park. Nevertheless, he had to stop for a second.

«You aren't getting old enough as an excuse to stop,» Bucky told him.

«Maybe I am,» Steve replied smiling.

«You know you suck at lying, right? Bucky asked him.

Steve smiled and took a deep breath.

«I don't know about you two, but I need a big breakfast now,» Sam said, approaching.

«I'm OK for now,» Steve replied to him. «I think I better go to change.»

«Can we talk for a second?» Bucky asked him.

«OK, I see you at the meeting then,» Sam shook hands with both and continued running.

«What on your head?» Bucky tone sounded concerned.

Steve shook his head and sat on a bench nearby.

«There is an idea. It keeps bothering me. It's a possibility. _ Maybe_,» Steve said thoughtfully.

«A sacrifice,» Bucky told him frowning. He sat by his side.

«Jesus, Buck. How could you?» Steve smiled and shook his head again. He knew him so well, he thought.

«You need to wait. He needs time,» Bucky told him.

«What if it isn't about time?» Steve said looking down. «What if it's about one of us taking the decision?»

«What are you saying?» Bucky was worried.

«Maybe I could stay in the past,» Steve said looking at him.

Bucky stared at him confused, but then he took a deep breath before speaking. «I don't know him enough. But that day in Siberia. He was fighting two fights. He was fighting me for what I had done to his parents. But _ you_. He was fighting the betrayal of someone he loved. I saw it in his eyes. When he fought you, it was about hurt. A different kind of pain.» 

«I cannot live without him,» Steve said with a lot pain in his voice.

«Don't do it. Don't sacrifice yourself because it's the right thing to do,» Bucky said putting a hand on his shoulder.

Steve stood up. «I feel like I was living a dream. Finally, I found my place in the world. But now, it feels like I woke up to a reality where I feel lost. Where I do not belong. _ Again_.»

«Steve,» Bucky stood up in front of him. «You can live this life. You aren't stealing anyone future or love. You deserve to be happy, with _ him_.» 

Steve took a deep breath and stared at the sky. Bucky spoke to him with such a wisdom. As someone who has lived enough to know best. But Steve was fighting an internal battle. _ It was about he doing what it was the best thing to do for all? Or it was about running away in fear? _ He wasn't sure anymore. He stood there in silence.

«Let's go for breakfast,» Bucky said taking him out of his thoughts.

Steve nodded.

  
  


— — — — —

  
  


After breakfast Steve returned to the dept, took a shower and went to the meeting. Again the anxiety for seeing Tony was taking part of him. When he arrived at the building, he found Bucky waiting for him at the door. He felt a little more calm. They were at the door of the office and knocked before entering. Natasha and Clint were talking and came to greet them. When he looked up for Tony, he saw Bruce and him talking over a screen projection. Tony immediately fixed his eyes on Steve when he realized he had arrived.

«Steve, good day. Ready for the test? Bruce greeted him.

«Good morning, Bruce. I am,» Steve replied looking at Tony.

«Great,» Bruce said and cleared his throat. «I think I need something from the...I'll be right back,» he finished saying and went with the others.

Steve could feel his heart beating desperately. He approached Tony who hadn't stopped looking at him.

«Good morning,» Steve said in front of him.

«Morning,» Tony replied almost in a whisper.

«How are you?» Steve asked and approached even more.

«I'm...» Tony stared at him. «I...». It seemed difficult to him to finish the sentence.

«I know,» Steve told him. He could see in his eyes the struggle. Tony was fighting inside him too. Steve wanted the life they shared to return, but this time _he_ could not do anything.

«OK. First we sent the Blondie here for the test. We correct everything we need and do this on Monday morning,» Rocket said entering the room. «What do you think?»

Steve noted the closeness between him and Tony when Tony took a step back a turned to reply to Rocket approaching the screen. 

«There wouldn't be needed any correction. I'm sure of that,» Tony replied looking at the screen. «I'm going to connect the rest and then we go to the hangar.»

  
  


— — — — —

The machine was smaller than the one they had created for the other journeys. However, the procedure remained the same. Steve was in the center of the device with his suit and GPS in hand. In the hangar were only Tony, Bruce, Rocket, Natasha and him.

«It can be any time you choose from the past,» Tony told him from the control desk. 

«In five seconds, you will be back,» Bruce said to him.

«I'm ready,» Steve replied. He set the watch and disappeared.

  
  


— — — — —

  
  


Steve did not go to the past very far. Just a few months ago. The day of his birthday. Bucky would surely make fun of him and call him sentimental. Maybe he was. Steve was outside the cabin and could hear the music playing from the porch. He closed his eyes leaning on the wooden wall and remembered that moment as he listened to the melody.

Tony would take a bottle of champagne in his hands, and Steve watched him carefully while leaning on one of the columns. Both were on the porch of the cabin. Tony approached him with the glasses.

"Congratulations, birthday boy," Tony handed him one of the glasses and came over to kiss him. "Or is it birthday old man?"

Steve laughed softly. "Thank you for this birthday. It has been one of my favorites," Steve told him feeling full of happiness.

"For you, Love," Tony raised his glass and they toasted. After drinking, Tony took the glass from Steve hand and put them on the table. He turned to Steve, took him by the hand and brought him to the center of the porch. "Friday, put on some music."

_ Someday he'll come along _

_ The man I love _

_ And he'll be big and strong _

_ The man I love _

_ And when he eats my way _

_ I'll do my best to make him stay _

_ He'll look at me and smile _

_ I'll understand _

_ Then in a little while _

_ He'll take my hand _

_ And though it seems absurd _

_ I know we both won't say a word _

They started dancing looking into their eyes. They were giving each other soft kisses that caressed their lips and tasted the blessed glory contained in that instant. Steve couldn't feel more grateful and happy. Better yet to see the same devotion he felt for him reflected in Tony's eyes.

_ Maybe I shall meet him Sunday _

_ Maybe Monday, maybe not _

_ I'm still sure to meet him one day _

_ Maybe Tuesday will be my good news day _

_ He'll build a little home _

_ That's meant for two _

_ From which I'll never roam _

_ Who would, would you _

_ And so all else above _

_ I'm dreaming of the man I love. _

"Marry me," Tony told him, his intense gaze pierced his soul.

"Tony," Steve was thrilled, his heart beating fast.

"Would you? Tony asked stroking his cheek.

"Yes," Steve said short of breath. He kissed him intensely as if that _ yes _was not enough. He wanted to show Tony he was his world and wanted with all his soul to live by his side forever.

"Now nobody will ever beat me over this birthday," Tony smiled out of breath.

"I love you," Steve kissed him again.

  
  


_ _ _ _ _

  
  
  


Steve returned to the hangar.

"Are you OK?" Tony asked approaching him.

"Yes. Everything went well on my part," Steve replied.

"Here too. We'll just adjust the time a little more. But we know it works well," Bruce said.

"Why don't we do it at once?" Steve asked them.

"It was just what I was going to say," Natasha approached them.

"Calm down, Blondie. We all want to get rid of those stones, but we also need to find the way you could handle and return them without dying," Rocket explained.

"As much as it hurts to admit it. He's right," Tony said.

"Of course you will not agree with me," Steve said, taking Tony's hand to give him the GPS.

Tony smiled with that mischievousness in his eyes Steve loved so much. He knew Steve was provoking him on purpose. They stared at each other, and Steve felt an electricity run through his body at the touch of Tony's hand. How could it be possible the simple touch of him could overwhelm him?

Someone cleared his throat and Steve turned to see Happy was there.

"Tony, it's time for the appointment," Happy told Tony. "Hi, Cap,"

"Glad to see you, Happy," Steve said to him with a smile.

"What appointment?" Tony asked while looking at the GPS in his hand.

Happy stared at Steve and then lowered his head to answer. "The doctor's appointment," he said half ashamed.

Tony looked up to see Steve. He had noticed the date Steve had gone. For a moment he looked confused, but then he also seemed to realize what Happy had said and looked down.

"Thanks, I'll be there in a minute," Tony looked up to see Happy who nodded.

"I'm going to change," Steve said looking at the floor. "See you on Monday then," and left the hangar.

  
  


_ _ _ _ _

  
  
  


"Hey," Steve saw Natasha coming. He was in the hallway leaning against the wall. She had followed him. "Come on, Steve. Don't give up so easily. It's not something Captain America would do," Natasha told him with a smile.

"Captain America knows what to do," Steve told her with a sigh.

"I'm the first one going all the worlds that could exist just to kick your ass, if it occurs to you to do it," Natasha said reproaching him.

Steve smiled with a half smile. "You wouldn't be the only one," Steve looked into her eyes.

"You two can't live without each other. You had not seen each other for a couple of days and have been flirting all morning," Natasha leaned on the wall in front of him.

"I missed him so much. I couldn't help it," Steve felt himself blushed.

"And he too Steve and don't deny me you didn't see it in his eyes. The poor man loses all his genius when you're in front of him," Natasha said smiling.

Steve smiled, but Natasha's words overshadowed his thinking as well. _ What if _ he was the one who needed to make the decision? He needed to talk to Bruce, he thought.

"I need to talk to Bruce," Steve told her.

Natasha shook her head. "Steve," she insisted.

"I just want...," Steve started talking.

"You can't hold the weight of the world in your hands. It's not fair," Natasha said worriedly. "A part of you knows he could come back to you (which is going to happen), but you are also afraid that is not the right thing to do."

"They were happy. They loved each other," Steve said sadly.

"You said it. In the past," Natasha was staring at him. "Life went on as it always does and united your lives a little more than they already were. Maybe everything happened for a reason, Steve."

Steve sighed and looked at the floor. Why was he so hard on himself? _ The doctor's appointment,_ he heard Happy say in his mind.

"See you later, Nat," Steve looked at her and went to look for Bruce.

_ _ _ _ _

  
  


Steve returned to the hangar and found Bruce still speaking with Rocket. Luckily, Tony was already gone.

"Cap, I thought you were gone," Bruce said with a soft smile.

"Bruce, can I talk to you for a few minutes?" Steve asked him.

"Yes, of course. Do you want us to go somewhere?" Bruce replied.

"Yes, it would be best," Steve nodded.

_ _ _ _ _

  
  


A few minutes later Bruce and Steve were in a cafe.

"I'm so sorry for what you're going through, Steve. I know it must be very difficult for you. And maybe you already know, but he's having a hard time too," Bruce said worriedly.

"What would happen if I decide to stay?" Steve asked directly.

Bruce was shocked at the question. "What do you mean?" He looked at him frowning.

"What would happen if I stayed in the past? Would it alter the future?" Steve could not look into in his eyes.

"Buddy, I don't think that is a good idea. It's only a matter of time. Tony has only been focused on the portal in recent days, has not stopped working day and night in the hangar. We all lived his pain for losing her. Now he is simply confused. But Steve, today you saw each other and I think we all clearly saw the end of all this..." Bruce was explaining him.

"Please, Bruce. I need an answer," Steve pleaded him.

"Steve," Bruce sighed and took a pause. "We cannot alter what has already happened. It existed and there is no going back. If you stayed in the past, you would only create an alternative timeline. But no, you would not alter this timeline," Bruce replied defeated.

"Thank you, Bruce. I just needed to know," Steve said looking at his cup.

"Don't do it," Bruce begged him now.

Steve looked him in the eye. "I'll go to the cabin. I need to be alone a few days. Please, don't tell Tony," Steve asked him, but he knew he surely would. Likewise, if he made the decision, there would be nothing to stop him.

_ _ _ _ _ 

  
  
  


Steve was standing at the end of the wooden path over the lake. In the sky, the grey clouds were filling every part. It will start raining soon, Steve thought. It had been good to be alone for a couple of days. Tomorrow he would make the journey of returning the stones. He knew what he had to do. Now he was sure. Suddenly, he heard the Iron Man suit land on the ground a few meters away. In one way or another, he knew Bruce would tell Tony what they have talked. He heard Tony's footsteps echo through the wood, but he couldn't turn to see him. He didn't feel strong enough to see him in the eyes. Thunders were heard in the sky.

"What the hell are you thinking when you talk about staying in the past?" Tony said annoyed.

Steve snorted. "It was just a question I asked Bruce," Steve said without turning around. Tony's voice accelerated his heartbeat with pangs that hurt too much.

"Who do you think you're fooling, Steve?" Tony said accusingly. "If you said it, it's because you thought about it. The mission is about returning the stones, that's all. You can't stay in the past."

"Why not?" Steve turned and looked at him defiantly. He felt some raindrops began to fall to his face.

"Because it is an extreme nonsense. Because you can't change the past," Tony told him exasperatedly.

“I do not pretend to change the past,” Steve replied him.

“You cannot be sure what could you create!” Tony said getting angry.

“I want to do it," Steve told him very seriously.

"Don't bullshit me, Steve. Why the hell would you want to do that?" Tony replied even more upset.

At that moment it started to rain harder, some lightnings fell in the distance with thunders brightening the sky.

"It's just another future, Tony. _ My future_, in another time," Steve told him firmly. 

"And now you're the expert in time theories? You can't stay!" Tony said loudly. 

Steve approached and was in front of him very closely "Why couldn't I stay there?" He said with an intense stare at Tony while the rain was wetting them. "Why can't I have my chance too? Why do I have to stay?" he said breathing hard.

Tony stared at him, his chest rising. “Because I love you,” he said out of breath. “And I cannot conceive my live without you,” his words sounded with a profound despair.

Steve was kissing him, and Tony welcomed his lips with the same passion as the first time their breaths joined in one. They were completely soaked in the rain. But nothing stopped them from surrendering all emotion, feelings, and yearning into that kiss. Steve missed those lips, that body, those hands that caressed him. Tony's breath became his and embraced his soul. If time did not exist. If it had not past, nor future. Then would only exists that moment in which both surrendered again to the other. 

“I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Steve. Please, I cannot lose you,” Tony said, pleadingly, breathing hard.

Steve stared at him with all the love he felt for him. "You are my life, Tony," he said with his voice affected by an overwhelming emotion.

"Love," Tony said with a sigh and stroking Steve's face. "You, always, _ you_." Tony kissed him again. 

Steve lifted him, and Tony wrapped his legs around him. Tony kissed him desperately while Steve took them inside the house. When they entered, Steve kicked the front door to close it while leaning Tony against a wall to continue kissing him. Steve missed Tony's moans when he kissed him, they were his delight. He went to his neck to suck that sensitive spot he knew made Tony groan and say his name. "_Steve_," he immediately heard him say with a groan full of longing. Steve repeated his movement and when he heard his name again, he also groaned with satisfying pleasure.

Tony stood up so he could take off Steve's wet shirt, and Steve repeated the same with Tony's. When Steve opened his shirt, the reactor light welcomed him once more. Steve laid his gaze on the reactor. His hand touched it gently. Suddenly, he realized Tony was trembling. They had spent too much time in the rain.

"You're shaking," Steve said looking into his eyes worried.

"You will warm me up, won't you?" Tony replied with that mischievous smile Steve loved so much.

Steve smiled immensely satisfied and was kissing him. Tony hugged him, wrapped his arms around him. And Steve felt Tony wanted not only his heat, but all of him. As if the purpose was to merge with Steve, so not a part of their bodies remain that were not touching.

A few minutes passed and Steve pulled away a little to open the zipper of Tony's pants and introduce his hand.

"Fuck," Tony said with a groan of agony. "Love, please, I need you," Tony said begging and Steve knew what he meant. Steve lowered Tony's pants completely, bending down to also take off his shoes while watching Tony's chest contract with a quick breath. He got up and took off his clothes. He watched Tony seeing him with hungry eyes. He came over to kiss him and when their naked bodies touched, they both groaned loudly.

"Steve," Tony pleaded him again, breaking the kiss.

Steve turned him over and took Tony's hands and put it over his head against the wall. Then he bent down, opened Tony's buttocks and began moistening his entrance with his tongue. The simple touch had made Tony groan in advance, but when Steve introduced his tongue, Tony was panting desperately. After a few minutes, Steve got up listening to Tony's huff because of his absence. Soon enough he pushed his cock inside him in a single effort that made Tony cry with pleasure. Steve didn't move feeling the pleasure of being inside Tony again, their bodies joined, all their skin brushing.

"Tony," Steve said hoarsely in his ear.

"I'm here. I'm yours," Tony replied panting.

Steve took out his cock and put it back moaning at once with Tony. Steve felt ecstatic of knowing Tony's whole body, what he liked, what gave him pleasure. Then he put one of his hands over Tony's and with the other took him by the waist to create a rhythm that pleased them both. Their skins had gone warm. There was no part of their bodies that did not feel ignited by the burning of their passion. Every breath, every thrust, every moan created the reality they both loved. Where there were only the two of them. Where the world had stopped many times so they could meet and be together. When Tony arched his back with a gasp, Steve knew he had hit the spot that would make him come in a few seconds. So he focused on getting his thrusts to that spot while listening to Tony moans.

"_Steve_," Tony said with a hoarse gasp, and he was coming without Steve touching him. That took Steve to the brink of ecstasy, and he could also feel his orgasm approaching. He took Tony's cock in his hands and stroked him once, and they both groaned to the delightful pleasure of orgasm. 

They were panting without moving. Steve had placed his head in Tony's neck. A few seconds passed, Steve pulled out and Tony was turning around. Both looked at each other closely. Their faces a few inches from the other while their breaths were returning to calm.

"I missed you from the moment I went out from that door. I'm a fool," Tony said embarrassed.

"We are all fools in Love," Steve said stroking his face. "I understood you, and I understand you now. It wasn't easy, but this time I had to wait for you to come to me," Steve looked at him with loving eyes. "And you did."

"I love you, as I had never loved anyone in my life," Tony told him and Steve could feel the strength of those words in his heart.

Steve looked at those eyes that were his life. "I love you," he told him and kissed him tenderly. "I was fooling myself by saying I should stay in the past. I just was scare at the thought of not being with you," Steve said looking at him ashamed.

"We're two stubborn idiots in love," Tony told him smiling.

Steve smiled full of joy again. “We are.”

Their lips sealed in a silent pact about love and their embrace marked in their skins the essence of the other forever. They belonged to each other.

  
  


_ _ _ _ _ 

  
  
  


_ August 12th, 2028. _

Tony kissed him on the cheek. "We're going to beat Daddy this time, aren't we?" he asked as he put him back on the floor. "Give me five." Tony saw him run to Steve who was putting together the soccer goal in the yard with the help of Peter.

Suddenly, Tony saw Morgan running towards him. He immediately carried her in his arms.

"Daddy, it's not fair," Morgan told him annoyed.

"What isn't fair honey?" Tony asked her stroking her face.

"Why can Johnny have two daddies, and I only have a daddy and a mommy?" Morgan explained him quite dissatisfied to the terrible situation.

Tony did his best not to laugh. "Well honey, do you want me to tell you a secret?"

Morgan was very happy. "Yes please."

"You love Steve like a daddy too, don't you?" Tony asked her and she nodded with a smile. "Then is a win-win," Tony assured her.

"How?" Morgan asked surprised.

"With just that you love him very much, Steve is also your daddy. So you practically have two daddies and a mommy," Tony said to her winking.

Morgan's face of surprise and satisfaction could not be greater. She hugged him tightly and ran to where Steve was in the yard playing with Johnny. Tony watched as Morgan said Steve name while she ran between the people. When Steve turned to see her, she extended her arms. Steve took her in his arms and spun her in the air. Morgan hugged him, kissed him on the cheek and Tony watched as Steve closed his eyes. His life was wonderful, he thought pleased.

Tony approached Thor who was taking care of the barbecue. They had made another tradition of coming to Tony and Steve's house in the summer to spend a few days. The team was the best family one could have, he thought. And the days they shared together, everyone treasured them immensely.

"How are those burgers going, Point Break?" Tony said smiling.

"Almost ready. Just two minutes," Thor replied cheerfully.

"Perfect," Tony told him.

Tony smiled when he saw Pepper touching Clint's wife's belly. He took a look at everyone gathered there. There was quite a lot of noise with so many children running from side to side. Peter was now making Happy laugh, maybe telling him some of those bad jokes he knew. Rhodey was talking with Sam, and Clint and Bucky seemed to be fighting over a card game...

"John, Morgan, please be careful with him," Tony heard Steve say as he approached him.

"Poor Benny," Steve said worriedly, and Tony smiled when he saw the children peeking over the new puppy.

"Poor me," Tony told him staring at him. "You have abandoned me."

Steve smiled and kissed him softly. "I have reserved your special care for the night," Steve said raising an eyebrow and Tony bit his lip. Suddenly, they heard the puppy complain.

"OK, we need to set rules. He's not a doll. He's a little puppy and needs care and love..." Tony heard Steve tell the children when he turned around.

"Stark, burgers are ready," said Thor triumphant.

“Great,” Natasha and Bruce cheered.

"Yes, this is life," Tony said happily.

  
  


_ _ _ _ _

**The ** **end**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Billie Holiday song - The Man I Love
> 
> “We are all fools in love” ― Jane Austen, Pride and Prejudice. (Yes, I took that one from Jane :P)
> 
> Thank you for reading :) Kisses! :*


End file.
